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Should I Bring Up Our Future?

"Does He See a Future With Me?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I have been seeing my boyfriend for almost a year now and the closest we have ever gotten to discussing our future together was when I asked him if he knew if he wanted kids a few weeks ago — he said yes. I had waited to bring things like that up seeing how the first few months of our relationship were a little rocky because of some personal things he was going through. Even though it was a bit rocky at first, we never had any doubts about wanting to be together. So besides asking the kids question, I have been happy to just let our relationship grow organically without putting any pressure on it. I was the one who said "I love you" first a few months ago and he immediately said it back to me. We have about a 10 year age gap; I guess now that we have been dating for a year and because of his age (he's getting to where if he plans to have kids he will need to do so in about the next four years) I'm getting anxious to know his thoughts about us and our future together. I want to marry and have kids with him — I have no doubts that he is all I want — I'm just wondering if I should bring up the future with him and how I should do it. I want to know if he has the same feelings I do, even though I don't think we're ready — personally or financially — for marriage and kids quite yet. Maybe part of it is because I have so much invested that if he doesn't feel the same I don't want to spend any more time with him. Neither of us is old, but we're not getting any younger and there is no point in being with someone if there are no thoughts of a more permanent commitment in the future. So no rush on moving forward, but I'm getting a little anxious that we have never come close to discussing it. Any thoughts or suggestions?

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