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Should I Wish My Ex a Happy Birthday?

"Should I Even Bother Wishing My Ex a Happy Birthday?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

We broke up in March and it was UGLY. He broke up with me and tore me apart with the things he said and did afterwards. Up until recently we weren't even able to speak without fighting. But a couple days ago he texted me apologizing for everything he did, for hurting me and being an asshole. He said I at least deserved a real apology. A couple days later I went out on a whim and asked him to stay over; I haven't seen him in months and I just miss him. He said it wasn't a good idea because his head was still messed up and that it wouldn't help him. But he did admit to missing me, which I was shocked about. I don't understand why he said seeing me wouldn't help him and that his head is still messed up, because he's the one that told me he detached himself from me, that he didn't love me anymore, and that he had stopped caring. Yet, he's concerned it'll dredge things up between us? If he truly didn't love me or care about me, he wouldn't be worried about seeing me again. We were head over heels in love while we dated and I do still love him.

The thing is, tomorrow is his birthday and I'm not sure if I should even say anything. On one hand I love him, and I want to sincerely wish him a happy birthday, and be civil with him, but on the other hand there's no point in me bothering if what I say or do won't change anything. I don't want to cave and be weak by trying to reach out to him again. Should I wish him a happy birthday or no? What's your opinion?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously on Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

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