What counts as cheating may get ambiguous, but whose fault it is does not. Spoiler — it's always the cheater! Yet the idea that women are somehow responsible for men cheating is as ludicrous as it is common.
So the last thing we need is women espousing the idea as "advice" in books like Sugarbabe. Author Holly Hill (a pseudonym) quit her job as a psychoanalyst and put an ad online for a sugar daddy. MSN Glo interviewed her, and she had tips for wives trying to keep their husbands home with fear and jealousy.
- "Don't let yourself go — there is nothing less valued than a commodity that no one else wants."
- Put his wandering eye to work for you, not against you: "That means negotiating some infidelity if you are not 'in the mood.' It does not have to be other lovers: It could be pornography, or a lap dance [at a strip club]."
- "Never cross legs for an extended period without arranging some sort of alternative." (ed. I don't know, either!)
- "Always remind him how valuable you are, how popular you are, and drop subtle hints that other men still find you desirable."
- If you find out he's cheating . . . "harness your jealousy, arrange to meet the woman — you might be able to work together to make your man the happiest guy in the world. What a wonderful thing to do for someone you love."
Just as I wouldn't blame Holly Hill for being the other woman (he's the one with the commitment), I would never blame the person cheated on, whether man or woman. It's only one person's fault, and that's the cheater.