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Summers Home After College

The Oddities of Coming Home After College

Here's a post from OnSugar blog My DISFunkshion.

Can’t quite put your finger on it can ya? It’s still the same bed, the same swings where you had your first kiss, the hallways which you walked with a carefree smile, but there’s something missing. Something just doesn’t feel right. Everything has changed and yet in some way, nothing has. But out of nowhere you’re suddenly smacked hard with the terrifying realization that home isn’t really home anymore.

It’s an unsettling thought for most of us because this means we really are growing up. The friends that were like family are strangers. Of course it's fun to get to see how everyone’s doing (you can make sure that mean girl is doing terribly and way less successful than you), reminisce with "remember whens" and high school seems like it was yesterday. But it wasn’t.

Keep reading...

For me, it’s been two years. I was close with everyone my senior year and thought we’d all be friends forever. But people change. And most of all, I’ve changed.

Not a single one of my BFFs are the same people they were in high school. Change is not necessarily a bad thing. It’s only when someone changes so drastically that you can’t remember why you were friends with them in the first place that it becomes a problem. Everyone’s paths have taken them on different roads with only a few remaining old, comfortable intersections and common paths. Slowly but surely, it’s happening right in front of our eyes and there’s no way to slow it down or turn it back.

But don’t dwell over how it used to be or how much easier life was back then, just remember this is all a part of growing up. We are all off to bigger and better things!

Want to see more? Start following My DISFunkshion or start your own OnSugar blog. Maybe your stories will be posted here on TrèsSugar!


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nyxmoxie nyxmoxie 6 years
I never went away to college, I went to a community college, then I moved out of state and am finishing up my last two years at a state university. I've worked from the get-go during college and am still working. My parents just sold their houses, and bought a new house in a retirement community, you have to be 55+ to live there. So I'm all on my own, and can't go home even if I wanted to. I pay rent, pay all my other bills, and I think its great. I love it, this whole independent thing is fun. I love being on my own, making my own decisions, doing whatever I want. Yay. As for my high school years, a couple of us went to the same community college, and then we grew apart. Even my old best friend whom I was best friends since I was 14 and we went to two separate high schools and just grew apart during those first couple of years after college. Today I don't keep in touch with any of them or anyone else that I went to high school with. Since my parents live in a retirement community, I have to book a hotel if I visit, and I don't see anyone that I went to school with. I think by moving out of state, it gave me a chance to start over, with new people and gave me a chance to be the person I am today without friends reminding me of whom I used to be. Sometimes friends can't let go that you've changed, well you can't help it if you change. You know? By making new friends, it gives you the chance for a clean slate, and I just needed that in life. The chance to start over.
nyxmoxie nyxmoxie 6 years
I never went away to college, I went to a community college, then I moved out of state and am finishing up my last two years at a state university. I've worked from the get-go during college and am still working. My parents just sold their houses, and bought a new house in a retirement community, you have to be 55+ to live there. So I'm all on my own, and can't go home even if I wanted to. I pay rent, pay all my other bills, and I think its great. I love it, this whole independent thing is fun. I love being on my own, making my own decisions, doing whatever I want. Yay.As for my high school years, a couple of us went to the same community college, and then we grew apart. Even my old best friend whom I was best friends since I was 14 and we went to two separate high schools and just grew apart during those first couple of years after college.Today I don't keep in touch with any of them or anyone else that I went to high school with. Since my parents live in a retirement community, I have to book a hotel if I visit, and I don't see anyone that I went to school with. I think by moving out of state, it gave me a chance to start over, with new people and gave me a chance to be the person I am today without friends reminding me of whom I used to be.Sometimes friends can't let go that you've changed, well you can't help it if you change. You know? By making new friends, it gives you the chance for a clean slate, and I just needed that in life. The chance to start over.
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
I think this happens anytime you leave home young and live somewhere else for a couple years. Its just a really huge and important transition time.
mediagirl2890 mediagirl2890 6 years
This was a great article. I too am home after my sophomore year of college, and I definitely saw how people changed, some for worst some for better. I have to say I think it was good, especially for me and my best friend. Out of everyone we have managed to stay in touch 24/7 no matter what, whether it be through video chat, IM, facebook, texting, calls, you name it (Guess being friends since well..since we were practically born helps). In just the first year of college we had to grow up really fast and dealt with a lot of issues that hadn't presented themselves to us before, but we always managed to be there for each other. It has only strengthened our relationship with one another. We both had very tough sophomore years (this year) with dealing with people we thought we could trust back stabbing us out of no where, and we were each others rocks. I think for us college really taught us that we can always depend on each other no matter what.
joriss joriss 6 years
That is so true, nothing stays the same after college. Everyone you know before is like a totally stranger. Even the closest and best of friends. Its like you have to get to know them again in order to bring back old times.
sourcherry sourcherry 6 years
Same as postmodernsleaze. It's more likely that I lose touch with my friends from college than my group of close friends from high school.
KibzeeLovee KibzeeLovee 6 years
thank you for touching on this topic! i just graduated and will probably be moving back home in a couple of months, i have been trying to mentally prepare myself for this transition!
Pistil Pistil 6 years
I didn't go too far from home and I made some of my best friends during my first year of college, so I didn't have quite the same experience.
postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 6 years
I didn't move away for college and neither did my best friends, so I never had the experience of returning home only to find it totally different. So we're closer than ever having been there to support eachother growing up and getting into our own apartments, dating in the "grown up" world, etc. I guess we're townies, haha.
mix-tape mix-tape 6 years
I feel guilty at times for not wanting to foster a relationship with old friends. I just let them go so easily. We weren't the same people in high school any more. I still keep in touch with one of my best friends from hs, even if he lives 4 hours away from me. Going home is still strange, that's why I avoid it unless there is an event I need to be present for, plus the six hour drive isn't economical for my college budget.
bryseana bryseana 6 years
I didn't move off and live in a dorm when I was in college because my mom was sick. I stayed home to help her out. She needed someone there to give her shots and take her to the hospital / doctor. It seemed like the most responsible decision.
chatondeneige chatondeneige 6 years
Honestly, this topic is *so* tired. Since Garden State came out (my freshman year of college, btw!) everyone has been churning out shit about this topic nonstop, and it's boring now.
runningesq runningesq 6 years
Oh man, I remember coming home after my freshman year in college (which was 6 years ago - wow!). It was so ... WEIRD. In college you're used to being around people constantly - home can feel too quiet and too, well, boring. You're used to being out with whomever you want, wherever you want, etc., and suddenly you have someone questioning where you're going and when you'll be home.It's a weird transition time !
runningesq runningesq 6 years
Oh man, I remember coming home after my freshman year in college (which was 6 years ago - wow!). It was so ... WEIRD. In college you're used to being around people constantly - home can feel too quiet and too, well, boring. You're used to being out with whomever you want, wherever you want, etc., and suddenly you have someone questioning where you're going and when you'll be home. It's a weird transition time !
syounus syounus 6 years
great topic!
syounus syounus 6 years
great topic!
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