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Sunday Confessional: My Insecurities Got the Best of Me

I recently started a great job at an office firm about 3 weeks ago. I'm still in "training mode" so I am still quite self conscious about any mistakes that I have made. One day, while working at the front desk, a blonde buxom girl came walking in with her resume, and asked me flat out if they were hiring for my position. Not knowing the answer to that question, I asked one of my coworkers, and they proceeded to tell her that they would keep her resume on file, "just in case there were any openings." So I went into my boss' office (he's on vacation) and put the resume on his desk.

That night, I couldn't stop thinking about the resume. I kept on thinking
that my boss would look at her resume and think that she is better
suited for the job than I am. I had heard that the position I have has a
high turnover rate at this firm, but I had also heard from coworkers that
my boss planned on keeping me on board for a long time. I don't know if they were lying to me or not, but I was still uneasy about the resume.

So the next morning, I slipped into my boss's office and took the resume off his desk. I folded it up, put it in my purse and took it home. Once I got home, I threw it in the trash. I know what I did was wrong, but I got so caught up in my own jealousy that I became intimidated by the woman I don't even know. Am I forgiven?

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calli-gurl calli-gurl 7 years
i understand the jealousy thingy too, but it doesnt mean that its right. you really had no right to do that. it wasnt yours and u caused that woman a loss. if ure boss hires her, then that means that shes better suited than you are. u wouldnt have to feel insecure if u felt that u were good at what u do. hm?
bransugar79 bransugar79 8 years
So wrong but I completely understand why you did it. No one likes to feel inadequate and I have to say I have had experiences like this. I have to say I wouldn't tell anyone at work about this because it could probably get you fired but I forgie you
Debbie-Dee Debbie-Dee 8 years
that's f'kd up! that's exactly why i prefer to speak with a manager upfront when i'm asking about a job opening...this would be worst case scenario and it actually happened....wow.....just wow....not forgiven!......
htiduj htiduj 8 years
look, you need to forgive yourself so that you can move on with your life and not be all jumpy at your job. its done, you cannot go back in time, and so you shouldnt let yourself harp on it.but, what you did was wrong.you have no right to take something out of your boss's office, and if your job is to give him messages etc. then you have to give him all messages - including resumes.for all you know, this girl was just a walk in - going to various businesses giving them resumes in the hopes that one will call her. try working on your self esteem, you got the job, you were doing well at it, there was no reason for you to think that you would be fired.if you cant jump over the esteem hurdle yourself, maybe you should consider talking with a therapist. therapy can be very helpful in combating self esteem.
htiduj htiduj 8 years
look, you need to forgive yourself so that you can move on with your life and not be all jumpy at your job. its done, you cannot go back in time, and so you shouldnt let yourself harp on it. but, what you did was wrong. you have no right to take something out of your boss's office, and if your job is to give him messages etc. then you have to give him all messages - including resumes. for all you know, this girl was just a walk in - going to various businesses giving them resumes in the hopes that one will call her. try working on your self esteem, you got the job, you were doing well at it, there was no reason for you to think that you would be fired. if you cant jump over the esteem hurdle yourself, maybe you should consider talking with a therapist. therapy can be very helpful in combating self esteem.
Trajidy Trajidy 8 years
Totally forgiveable. You know how many resumes I trashed on behalf of co-workers whose jobs were in jeopardy? Omg. Happens everyday....From receptionist to COO. LOL....don't even think about it.
Stella10 Stella10 8 years
Totally Forgiveable. Absolute, don't stress.
gladjenta gladjenta 8 years
forgive...but don't tell ANYONE! and don't do it again. obviously.
gladjenta gladjenta 8 years
forgive...but don't tell ANYONE! and don't do it again. obviously.
nitronat nitronat 8 years
Not forgive. It will probably hurt you in the end. Something just might come out and this could really really hurt you.You made an impulsive and rash decision based solely on jealousy. No rationality was involved.You didn't think of the consequences of your actions. How it could hurt yourself or your employer. I can't feel for your position either because you *were* hired for a *reason*. You are expected to be honest 100% with your employer. I can bet you you would have gained bonus points if you put the resume on his desk. He would have totally respected that and thought that you had good character and integrity.You need to own up to this to yourself and figure out exactly why you did that and try to make sure you *never ever* do that again.
nitronat nitronat 8 years
Not forgive. It will probably hurt you in the end. Something just might come out and this could really really hurt you. You made an impulsive and rash decision based solely on jealousy. No rationality was involved. You didn't think of the consequences of your actions. How it could hurt yourself or your employer. I can't feel for your position either because you *were* hired for a *reason*. You are expected to be honest 100% with your employer. I can bet you you would have gained bonus points if you put the resume on his desk. He would have totally respected that and thought that you had good character and integrity. You need to own up to this to yourself and figure out exactly why you did that and try to make sure you *never ever* do that again.
sherry88 sherry88 8 years
I agree with apsara [+] and Asia84 [+]. what you did was wrong, they could have even been testing you to see your reaction, oy i donno what to tell you even if you yourself were a dumb blond thats still totally unforgivable, although you should ask your boss for the forgiveness other then people who will just say its female nature sorry girls but its not im a chick and no way would i ever do that that. you had to think out a plan on not getting caught and so on its not forgiveable to much thought and effert into destroying her
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
With that attitude, you'll get replaced anyways.You have to be tough, and know that you are competent and a good fit for the job.You should know that if they were to fire you and hire blondie, that eithera. she was more qualified, therefore you shouldn't be jealous. it's reality orb. they hired her because she's hot. and you don't want to work for a company that does that.
Asia84 Asia84 8 years
With that attitude, you'll get replaced anyways. You have to be tough, and know that you are competent and a good fit for the job. You should know that if they were to fire you and hire blondie, that either a. she was more qualified, therefore you shouldn't be jealous. it's reality or b. they hired her because she's hot. and you don't want to work for a company that does that.
InfernalMari InfernalMari 8 years
To quote Ugly Betty, you tapped your inner 'Mode Girl'. I say 'forgive', because I appreciate that while what you did was underhanded, ruthless, sneaky and rotten, so's business. She was incredibly rude by asking up front for whether your position's up for grabs, she should have gone right to Human Resources...As long as you can keep your mouth shut, you'll be fine. Work as hard as you can to make yourself invaluable.
AmorFati AmorFati 8 years
The person who needs to forgive you is your boss. You usurped his or her prerogative. And not that far into your job. Bad idea. The woman was probably asking for it by approaching her job hunt in such an unprofessional manner, though I agree with those who pointed out that maybe more than one person might be able to have "your job"--she might have meant "a job like yours." Don't sweat it too much over this woman; nobody should ever hand-deliver a resume or ask staff if there are any jobs available. But worry a little about what the boss is going to think if he finds out you did this. The woman could call and ask if he has seen the resume, and she might well finger you. On the other hand, you may have inadvertently done yourself a favor: anything like this should go through HR, and you might have been a bit unpopular for loading your boss down with paperwork that he or she shouldn't have to get in such an, uh, direct manner. You might be able to come clean after a fashion by telling your boss about the incident and saying that you removed the resume when you realized the woman had not gone through the right channels and you might have made a mistake leaving it on his desk. Then if she calls back you will be covered, even if you get reprimanded for taking it away. If you're pushed on why, just say that the woman's rudeness turned you off.
AmorFati AmorFati 8 years
The person who needs to forgive you is your boss. You usurped his or her prerogative. And not that far into your job. Bad idea. The woman was probably asking for it by approaching her job hunt in such an unprofessional manner, though I agree with those who pointed out that maybe more than one person might be able to have "your job"--she might have meant "a job like yours." Don't sweat it too much over this woman; nobody should ever hand-deliver a resume or ask staff if there are any jobs available. But worry a little about what the boss is going to think if he finds out you did this. The woman could call and ask if he has seen the resume, and she might well finger you. On the other hand, you may have inadvertently done yourself a favor: anything like this should go through HR, and you might have been a bit unpopular for loading your boss down with paperwork that he or she shouldn't have to get in such an, uh, direct manner. You might be able to come clean after a fashion by telling your boss about the incident and saying that you removed the resume when you realized the woman had not gone through the right channels and you might have made a mistake leaving it on his desk. Then if she calls back you will be covered, even if you get reprimanded for taking it away. If you're pushed on why, just say that the woman's rudeness turned you off.
lexichloe lexichloe 8 years
Um, I have a big problem w/ the way this question was phrased. Most likely, it went something like this: "Hi, I'm Jane, I wanted to apply for the receptionist position, could you please pass my resume along?" I'm sure this "buxom blonde" LOLLLLLLLLLLLL...didn't say, "Hi, I'm here for your job, give my resume to my future boss." I'm sorry, I'm disgusted by this entire post, I think it's a joke.
lexichloe lexichloe 8 years
Um, I have a big problem w/ the way this question was phrased. Most likely, it went something like this: "Hi, I'm Jane, I wanted to apply for the receptionist position, could you please pass my resume along?" I'm sure this "buxom blonde" LOLLLLLLLLLLLL...didn't say, "Hi, I'm here for your job, give my resume to my future boss." I'm sorry, I'm disgusted by this entire post, I think it's a joke.
jenniferellen jenniferellen 8 years
I was tempted to say unforgiven, just because many people are hard up for jobs. At the same time, you want to keep your job and she's probably applying to many other places as well and will more than likely get a job somewhere else. I guess now I would want to say forgiven, but I think undecided is best...haha, not that it really matters.It's better to play fair though. I mean...wouldn't you have felt better if you'd been able to keep the job, knowing her resume looked so good. It would have probably given you a higher sense of achievement.
jenniferellen jenniferellen 8 years
I was tempted to say unforgiven, just because many people are hard up for jobs. At the same time, you want to keep your job and she's probably applying to many other places as well and will more than likely get a job somewhere else. I guess now I would want to say forgiven, but I think undecided is best...haha, not that it really matters. It's better to play fair though. I mean...wouldn't you have felt better if you'd been able to keep the job, knowing her resume looked so good. It would have probably given you a higher sense of achievement.
Hootie Hootie 8 years
Yipe, seems you can't be trusted! Sorry but that was so wrong.
apsara1 apsara1 8 years
Look, it's not like you committed genocide, but I said "not forgive", because this was not an impulse - you thought about it, went to a lot of effort and did a sneaky underhanded thing. Mostly I wouldn't want someone who would do this on my team because I couldn't trust them. Find a way to work through your insecurities and try to remember that your personal honor is the one thing nobody but you can besmirch.
machete machete 8 years
Stop Acting Like A wet Sock.This Is A tough world. Yes, There Are morals We should Consider. What was done was done.
machete machete 8 years
Stop Acting Like A wet Sock. This Is A tough world. Yes, There Are morals We should Consider. What was done was done.
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