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Tips For Moving in Together

Do You Have Tips For Moving In Together?

Moving in together is an exciting step for a couple. But the change and added pressure can stress some people out, too. A TrèsSugar community member recently asked for some advice on the topic. She's worried about finances, the heightened commitment, and whether or not she and her mate are going to become sick of each other.

There are lots of logistics to discuss before moving in. You should tackle questions like: Will you split major purchases for the house? What will happen to these big-ticket items, like a couch, if you break up? How will you share the bills? And since we know cleanliness is a common cause of fighting, it's smart to chat about chores before you're faced with a messy argument. If you can afford it, it might even be worth budgeting in a monthly cleaning service to avoid fights about a dirty bathtub or dusty dinning room.

As for concerns over spending too much time together, I think it's smart to build in some alone time. Maybe you can agree that on the weekends, you'll each have some time in the apartment alone while the other person runs errands, or plan to leave the house while your partner has friends over.

Let's help out this reader by pooling our collective knowledge. What advice would you give someone about to move in with a partner?

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postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 5 years
I agree about both being on the same page as far as where the relationship is going. I don't get it when couples move in together without having any goal for their relationship in mind and before you know it, they're packing their bags. What a waste of time!
gingirl gingirl 5 years
I agree with both of the above posters. Our biggest thing was to TALK about everything we could before we moved in, so there wouldn't be any huge surprises. We opened a joint checking account together for bills/rent/food etc. Since my boyfriend works more than I do, I usually do more around the house, simply because I have the time to do so. We talked beforehand about chores that were non-negotiables (I hate cleaning bathrooms, he hates raking leaves). We've also implemented date nights, because it's important to get out of the house and do fun stuff, not just veg watching tv together - and to go out with friends! Everybody needs some space.
jelibeann jelibeann 5 years
All of the above suggestions are great. I think another major discussion should be money - when my husband and I moved in together (and were still dating), we set up a joint checking account that we each directly deposited the same amount of money into. This was where we drew from for ALL living expenses...rent, utilities, groceries, a new rug, etc. This way, we were both contributing equally. Once we got married, we just combined everything and it has worked well for us. I know money has been an awkward issue for a lot of our friends that have moved in together and I think it's because they didn't have a plan when they started living with each other. Everyone was raised to think about money differently, so it's important to create a compromise you are both comfortable with.
jelibeann jelibeann 5 years
All of the above suggestions are great. I think another major discussion should be money - when my husband and I moved in together (and were still dating), we set up a joint checking account that we each directly deposited the same amount of money into. This was where we drew from for ALL living expenses...rent, utilities, groceries, a new rug, etc. This way, we were both contributing equally. Once we got married, we just combined everything and it has worked well for us. I know money has been an awkward issue for a lot of our friends that have moved in together and I think it's because they didn't have a plan when they started living with each other. Everyone was raised to think about money differently, so it's important to create a compromise you are both comfortable with.
Rory1225 Rory1225 5 years
I think there are two main things to making moving in together work. First, make sure that you on the same page as to where you see your relationship going. If you expect that he will propose soon because you are moving in, say so! Talk about how long you are willing to co-habitate without that commitment.Second, compromise to make your own routine. Everyone has a routine. That is naturally going to have to change a little when you move in with someone else. You need to compromise with each other. You hate to do laundry? Maybe he hates to wash dishes. It's all about making your schedules work for you. But don't forget to keep the spark alive :)
Rory1225 Rory1225 5 years
I think there are two main things to making moving in together work. First, make sure that you on the same page as to where you see your relationship going. If you expect that he will propose soon because you are moving in, say so! Talk about how long you are willing to co-habitate without that commitment. Second, compromise to make your own routine. Everyone has a routine. That is naturally going to have to change a little when you move in with someone else. You need to compromise with each other. You hate to do laundry? Maybe he hates to wash dishes. It's all about making your schedules work for you. But don't forget to keep the spark alive :)
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