As someone who sleep talks on occasion, I get extremely embarrassed when someone hears me. Going back as far as middle school sleepovers, I find it mortifying that I can say such nonsensical and potentially revealing things with absolutely no control. This fact should make me feel sorry for Adam, an Englishman whose wife records and then blogs the "colorful existence" he lives in his dreams, but I can't help but laugh. The site, My Sleep Talkin' Man, is simply too outrageous.
Here are some of the best sleepy sentences from Adam:
- "Snail fiddling is not an occupation I'd be proud of. You dirty f*cker."
- "You can't be a pirate if you don't have a beard. I said so. MY boat, MY rules."
- "My badger's gonna unleash hell on your ass. Badgertastic!"
- "I'm baking pillows. Burn them slowly, keeps them fluffy! Mmmmmm, pillows."
- "I don't want to die! I love sex. And furry animals."
- "No, not the cats. Don't trust them. Their eyes. Their eyes. They know too much."
- "Hey, don't . . . don't say anything. Why don't you put it in an email, then I can ignore it at my pleasure."
Isn't it just so badgertastic?
Source: Flickr User Evil Erin