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When You Break Up, Does It Matter Whose Decision It Was?

Not long after former lovers Ryan Phillippe and Abbie Cornish parted ways last weekend did parting shots come from their respective camps. The exes's reps tell two different stories: Abbie's says she ended the relationship, while Ryan's says he "ended the relationship and asked her to move out of his house." Ouch. After a breakup, do you try to set the record straight about who dumped whom, or do you take the "mutual decision" high road?

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Monique-Marie427757 Monique-Marie427757 6 years
You can talk until you are blue in the face to people to tell them what really happened and if they don't want to believe it then they won't.
PinkNC PinkNC 6 years
Who honestly cares who dumped who....just maturely go your separate ways and keep all of your business to yourself. There most likely will be rumors about your break up so why make them worse or have the rumors lasting longer. It's really a petty issue to get so concerned about.
inlove23 inlove23 6 years
Haha! I agree with advah and looseseal. I don't understand why it even matters. I hate how in college the same thoughts are carried through a little bit. A recent friend of mine and her boyfriend broke up, and whenever someone brings it up everyone wants to know who broke up with who, but to me it didn't even matter.
looseseal looseseal 6 years
Ha, yes! I would have cared about making sure people know I did the dumping in high school. If I actually dump someone now, I wouldn't feel right going around telling people I dumped him. It'd just be so mean to pile that on top of the hurt of being dumped. Even if he wants to go around telling people he dumped me to make himself feel better, I'd let it go. If it was an ugly breakup, like he was a cheating jackass or something, then all bets are off.
looseseal looseseal 6 years
Ha, yes! I would have cared about making sure people know I did the dumping in high school.If I actually dump someone now, I wouldn't feel right going around telling people I dumped him. It'd just be so mean to pile that on top of the hurt of being dumped. Even if he wants to go around telling people he dumped me to make himself feel better, I'd let it go.If it was an ugly breakup, like he was a cheating jackass or something, then all bets are off.
Advah Advah 6 years
Not really (again, unless something despicable happened). For some reason it was always a big deal in junior/high school, but I feel when you grow up you end up realising it actually doesn't matter. All it matters is that breaking up sucks sucks sucks, whether you made the decision or not. And in those situations, it's not like there's a winner and a loser who couldn't understand what to do right - there's no right or wrong, there's just things working out or not. And when it doesn't work out, it just sucks.
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 6 years
Generally, I'm silent on that subject, as I think it's nobody else's business. My ex could say whatever he wants (or he could be silent on the subject). Either way, I wouldn't care less as he's an ex, and he's no longer part of my life. His words would have no real effect on me or my life anymore, so I wouldn't care.The only exception I would make is with my inner circle of confidantes. I would share with them what happened, as we're close, and we have a caring, trusting relationship. I would be truthful about what happened, and I would ask them to be discrete with the information, as it's sensitive and personal to me. All my confidantes have been very honorable and trustworthy about this, as I have been with their sensitive, personal information.
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 6 years
Generally, I'm silent on that subject, as I think it's nobody else's business. My ex could say whatever he wants (or he could be silent on the subject). Either way, I wouldn't care less as he's an ex, and he's no longer part of my life. His words would have no real effect on me or my life anymore, so I wouldn't care. The only exception I would make is with my inner circle of confidantes. I would share with them what happened, as we're close, and we have a caring, trusting relationship. I would be truthful about what happened, and I would ask them to be discrete with the information, as it's sensitive and personal to me. All my confidantes have been very honorable and trustworthy about this, as I have been with their sensitive, personal information.
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 6 years
You're right mama, I guess it depends on why you're breaking up. I wouldn't let someone screw me over and then lie to cover his own ass, but I wouldn't leak private details if I didn't have to.
mamasitamalita mamasitamalita 6 years
if someone is "at fault", like for example one partner cheats on the other, then it could probably matter. another example is that when my ex and I broke up about a month ago, I technically did the "dumping" but I'm still really devastated because it didn't work out for us.
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