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Where Do You Stand? Spending the Holidays Together For the Sake of the Kids?

In the midst of all the scandal and rumors surrounding the Madonna and Guy Ritchie split, new reports say that they will be spending Christmas together, for the sake of their kids that is. While I think the idea is nice, I'm not sure faking it, if you will, is necessarily a good idea. Obviously different things work for different families, but ladies, where do you stand on the notion of spending the holidays together for the sake of the kids when the parents are clearly in an unhappy, volatile relationship?

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bluesteyes bluesteyes 7 years
if Mag can hide her ego then great!
jessie jessie 7 years
sometimes its just worst to see the parents acting all cold should to each other. my parents were like that. it ended up being easier to spend Christmas's seperately with each parent. plus being a kid...i got more excited having Christmas several times.
WeTheLiving WeTheLiving 7 years
My mom used to invite my dad over for Thanksgiving and it was great for us. As a kid, you feel bad for the parent that is alone on the holiday and it makes you feel guilty and worried they'll think you don't love them (kids mentality). We always spent Christmas Eve with our dad, then Christmas morning with our mom and usually our dad would come over and eat with us. If your parents can set aside all their stuff and get along for a few hours to spend the holiday with their kids, then it's great. It was nice for our parents to call a truce on holidays and birthdays so we got to see both, but didn't have to worry about them fighting.
psterling psterling 7 years
My parents always did this, even though they never got along. Holidays always sucked and the only ones who felt good about it were my parents, who thought they were doing us some kind of favor.
lickety-split lickety-split 7 years
tough if the parents don't like each other. suck it up for your kids. christmas isn't about you, it's about your children. as adults we are in charge of our emotions, not the other way around. if the parents "are clearly in an unhappy, volatile relationship" they need to grow up and keep their differences away from the kids. parents don't have to be bff's, but they need to show their children that they respect each other. this is a really good move by madonna i think. she's puting her kids first.
starangel82 starangel82 7 years
I think it's okay if the exs can get along civilly. Otherwise, you'll just end up ruining Christmas for the kids and everyone else.
caryatid caryatid 7 years
Lord, if my parents tried this it would RUIN my Christmas... Divorced/separated people are that way for a reason and pretending that can still be best friends or even get along (especially this soon after the divorce!!) is asking a bit too much. And Angela, the spoiling them with two Christmases isn't really very effective. The extra effort only highlights the reason for the extravagance.
caryatid caryatid 7 years
Lord, if my parents tried this it would RUIN my Christmas... Divorced/separated people are that way for a reason and pretending that can still be best friends or even get along (especially this soon after the divorce!!) is asking a bit too much.And Angela, the spoiling them with two Christmases isn't really very effective. The extra effort only highlights the reason for the extravagance.
hibiscus96818 hibiscus96818 7 years
Coming from a broken home, I think it is great to spend the holidays together if, and only if, the exes get along and there is no tension between them at all. Kids pick up on tension between parents very quickly and that can ruin the holiday. If the exes can get along it saves them from being alone on Christmas and it saves the kids from feeling guilty about having fun with one parent while the other parent is alone.
skigurl skigurl 7 years
depends on how well you get along with your ex and how young the kids are, but i would say MAYBE do it for a couple hours, for the whole opening presents under the tree situation at 6am in the morning to keep the kids happy but in terms of dinners and spending elongated periods of time together, it's really not necessary and may do more harm than good.
Angela123 Angela123 7 years
I agree with you, Dear, and with the poster above. I don't think it's helping the kids at all to FORCE them to have what is almost sure to be a tense and uncomfortable holiday. Spoil them a bit, let them have 2 Christmases that are happy and fun and all about them, not about Mommy and Daddy's divorce.
CoMMember13630786602261 CoMMember13630786602261 7 years
I dunno. I think its kinda weird. Honestly, I think its more confusing for kids if you do this. Because they are trying to get used to the idea of their parents being apart and then you get back together for the holidays and you either A) give them false hope or B) they will be able to sense the tension. I think kids are much more keen to these things than adults realize. I come from a broken home and we just always did things seperatly. It worked fine.
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