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Why Don't I Want to Have Sex

Group Therapy: Why Don't I Want Sex?

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I don't want it often. Maybe, every few weeks, I'll want it a fair amount, about 2-3 times a week. But, then . . . I don't want it again. It can be up to about a month where I don't want to have sex with my boyfriend. We've been together for 6 years. We love each other so much. He gets frustrated when I hit my not-turned-on patch, and I hate rejecting him, and I know it hurts him. Emotionally . . . everything is amazing. Sexually, we've always had some difficulty.

Sometimes it hurts when we have sex, due to me being too tight. Believe me, we've tried everything. Apparently that won't be fixed until after I have kids, according to my gynecologist, which I can deal with. Sex is OK,  but foreplay is amazing. We both agree on that topic. So, there's no loss there.

Get the rest after the jump!

The main issue is me not wanting it enough. And I believe that my sexual appetite isn't normal. To want it a few weeks in a row, but then for it to fall away almost completely . . . is insane. I've spoken to my doctor about it. They can't figure out what it is. My hormones are fine. I used to suffer depression, but I don't anymore. I feel happy, and content . . . except disappointing my partner is so mean, and I feel guilty about it.

I just, I don't know what to do. I want to change. He wants sex all the time. But eventually, he stops initiating anything for a bit because he doesn't want to get rejected. I totally understand this. We love each other so much. We are soul mates. He even wants to marry me as soon as we have enough money and graduate. We are young. I'm 24 this year, and he's 23. We've been together since we were 17. We were each other's firsts. I want to spend the rest of my life with him.

So . . . any idea why I don't want it in blocks? It seems to always be right after my period. Or at least that's the trend I've noticed. Just a bit of advice, or . . . something would be great.

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