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You Asked: Am I Being Bridezilla?

Dear Sugar,

I recently got engaged, and my fiancé and I are planning a small destination wedding. We both come from fairly large families and them alone is already 50 guests, which leaves very little room for friends.

I am curious to see what the general opinion is about having a small destination wedding (50 or so) and then having another party, say in my hometown, where all of our family, friends, and extended family could attend. I know a destination wedding might be too pricey for some of our guests so I want to be able to accommodate everyone. I know etiquette dictates that if you invite someone to an engagement party or shower you should also invite them to the wedding, but is asking certain guests to attend one wedding and not the other in poor taste? And is asking other guests to attend both selfish? I don't want to be looked at as a Bridezilla! — Planning My Wedding Miranda

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Dear Planning My Wedding Miranda,

There are millions of etiquette books out there that dictate all sorts of rules about weddings, but when it comes down to it, your wedding day is all about how you and your fiancé want to celebrate your love. If you wish to have a destination wedding (perhaps it'd be best if you only invited immediate family) and then have a larger party for those guests that couldn't travel with you, by all means do it! If you have some overlapping guests, be mindful that they might not be able to commit to both celebrations. If that's the case, don't take the decision of those who decline personally.

Of course no one aims to be a Bridezilla, so just be mindful of your big day: remember that it's about the marriage, not the wedding. Though your wedding will no doubt be one of the most memorable days of your life, if you keep everything in perspective, I'm sure you'll be an even-keeled bride! Good luck to you.


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