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You Asked: Am I Going to Get Hurt?

Dear Sugar,

I recently met a pretty amazing guy, and we hit it off right away. About two weeks in, we had a state-of-the-union conversation, and he told me that he just got out of a year-long relationship and doesn't want to get into anything serious right now. We agreed to try just being friends, but that only lasted two weeks because we have this crazy chemistry and we love being together. Since friendship didn't work, we decided to date and keep things casual. We're seeing a lot of each other still, and I can feel myself really starting to fall for him, but I'm scared that I'm going to get hurt at the end because he's been so adamant about not starting up a serious relationship again. He makes time for me and he treats me like a girlfriend; we even met each other's parents. So am I just being paranoid? Am I heading for big trouble/heartbreak by letting myself fall for him? Should I get out now before it's too late? — Setting Myself Up Sadie

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Dear Setting Myself Up Sadie,

Although this guy says he doesn't want a relationship, it's pretty clear by his actions that he does! As the old saying goes, actions speak louder than words, but I completely understand your concerns. Another talk is definitely in order, but I recommend keeping it fairly laid-back. Tell him how much fun you've been having with him, but make sure you let him in on your fears too — again, in a casual way. You don't want to scare him off, but it's important to be honest. Something tells me he's afraid to put a label on your relationship so see how he reacts to your talk — hopefully he'll be able to calm your fears.

There are no guarantees in any relationship, even the ones that have labels on them, so if it feels right and if you're enjoying the time you spend together, I say stick with it. Good luck and have fun!


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