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You Asked: Am I Selling Myself Short?

Dear Sugar,

I met this great guy about a month and a half ago and we really hit it off. He told me when we first started dating that he had recently broken up with his ex who he dated for two and a half years. He opened up to me yesterday and said that he was frustrated because he wasn't sure if he was ready for another serious relationship right now. He says that he really likes me, but he thinks everything happened too fast between us. I was really upset by his decision to take a step back, but I agreed to remain in contact with him.

My problem is that I really like him, and I think he really likes me, but I'm not too sure what to do now. I know he's not ready for a relationship, but maybe if I give him time, he will be later on? I don't want to stop seeing him because he was a great friend before we started going out, but I don't want to just string myself along and end up getting hurt. I am also confused as to the status of our relationship now. Are we taking things slow, or are we just friends? If you have any insight, I'd love to hear what you have to say. — Unresolved Rebbecca

To see DearSugar's answer

Dear Unresolved Rebbecca,

So you don't hold on to false hope, I suggest you talk with this guy about whether or not you have a future together. I'm glad he was honest with you about not feeling ready to jump back into another relationship, but it sounds like you're still unclear as to where you stand now, which must be incredibly confusing.

If he's unable to give you an answer, you're going to have to just feel it out. I wouldn't advise you to pass up opportunities to date other men, but if you feel that you can maintain a friendship while continuing to live your life, I say why not.

It's easy to blur the lines of love so be sure to keep the lines of communication open and hopefully your future with him will become clear one way or another. Good luck.


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