Dear Sugar --
My boyfriend told me that just because he loves me, it doesn't mean he doesn't want to have sex with other people. What the hell? In my opinion, it's OK to find other people attractive but if you really love someone, it doesn't seem right that you would actually want to have sex them! I know he isn't cheating on me and I don't believe that he's interested in anyone else, but I do think if I gave him permission to have sex with someone else, he might! How am I supposed to take that? It's been a while since he's said anything about it but it's eating away at me and I can't seam to let it go. Help! -- Confused Constance
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Dear Confused Constance --
Wow, I have to tell you Constance, a statement like that would eat away at me too! Without knowing the context of your conversation, it's hard to grasp what his intentions are. Was he trying to say he doesn't believe in monogamy or was he saying he wants to see other people and have an open relationship? Since you're committed to this man, it's important to get to the bottom of this asap. If he isn't happy, you as a couple, need to figure out what's missing in your relationship and decide if it's worth fixing.
Feeling insecure in your relationship can't feel very good so if you truly believe that your boyfriend would sleep with someone else if given the permission and opportunity, you might want to reconsider this partnership. Not only is it emotionally unfair to you to doubt him, but sleeping around isn't healthy in terms of spreading STIs. At the end of the day, you're going to have to trust your gut instincts and decide if you want to be with someone that might not have the same views about what a committed relationship is all about. Good luck.