My amazing, loving boyfriend of over a year dislikes a really close girlfriend of mine. He dislikes her to the point he will avoid being around her. The problem is I am moving into an apartment with her in a few months, I told him about my plans and he said he won't visit me. He says that is the "consequence" of moving in with someone he doesn't approve of. He doesn't mind me living with her but he refuses to have anything to do with her. It all started when they had an argument a while back, it was a minor thing. We were at a dinner party with friends and he was acting very standoffish and she questioned him about his behavior.
Needless to say she wasn't nice about it and he left the party because he was irritated. The next time they bumped heads it was my fault, I told about some issues I was having with him and she asked his friend about it. My boyfriend didn't like her discussing him behind his back and completely wrote her off. She doesn't even know that he really dislikes her because they haven't had any other reason to interact for the whole year that I have been with him. I want to resolve the problem between both of them before it gets worse. What do I do? --In the Middle Millie
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Dear In the Middle Millie--
It is always tough when your best friend and boyfriend don't get along so I see why you are at a loss. In most instances, jealousy is a driving factor for those two important figures in one's life to butt heads.
Moving in with your best friend could create serious tension in your relationship with your boyfriend. Have you already signed a lease? If not, I advise you to give your living situation a second thought. You want to be comfortable in your own home and your boyfriend shouldn't feel like he can't, or doesn't want to come see you.
With that said, separating them completely might make matters worse. Do they even know each other well enough to be certain they don't like each other? Have they ever sat down and hashed out their differences? While there is nothing you can do to force these two to like each other, let them both know how important they are to you and how much it would mean if they could at least try to be civil to each other, especially with this new living situation.
It sounds as though their dislike towards each other has no real merit, so hopefully in time, they can put aside their differences and learn to get along. after all, they have at least one thing in common-- they both love you! I wish you luck.