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You Asked: Is He Overstepping His Boundaries?

Dear Sugar,
My husband is 32 years old and thinks it's normal to talk about his sex life with his mother. When we were dating, his mom once told me that I should learn how to give a good blow job in order to attract him more. Then one Valentine's Day, she was the one that told me the kind of lingerie he likes! I was extremely grossed out but at that time, since I was so crazy about him, I did not give importance to the weirdness. He tells me that a lot of men talk about their sex life to their moms, even at his age. This makes me very uncomfortable to say the least, and I can't help but constantly feel embarrassed around her. Am I correct in thinking that he's overstepping by talking to his mom about our intimate sex life or is this kind of relationship in fact as normal as he claims? — Grossed Out Gretta

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Dear Grossed Out Gretta,

I've never heard of a grown man talking about such intimacy with his mom, but to each his own. The problem I see with your situation is that it's making you uncomfortable. Since this is both of your sex lives he's talking about, I think it's only fair that he makes sure you're comfortable with him divulging such private information before doing so. Some people don't appreciate their significant others talking about their sex lives with their buddies, so I can only imagine how awkward it is to have his mother be in the know with this information.

Since he doesn't see anything wrong with it, you're going to have to approach the topic from a different angle. Let him know how it makes you feel that his mother knows about what goes on behind closed doors and that you'd appreciate it if he would keep those intimate details to himself. Hopefully he'll be a little more understanding of your feelings once he hears the uncomfortableness in your voice verses hearing a frustrated or annoyed tone. I'm all for being uninhibited when it comes to talking about sex, but it's incredibly important that both parties are permitting of such open disclosure. I hope that after a good heart to heart, he'll be able to respect your desire to be more private.


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