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You Asked: Her Invite Has Me Confused

Dear Sugar,

My friend's wedding invitation arrived in the mail yesterday, and it was addressed to my name and "partner." My friends know that I'm not seeing anyone at the moment, yet they included this in my invite. As I don't want to go alone (I won't know anyone at the ceremony or party), do I just assume that this is giving me permission to bring a friend instead of a romantic date? Or would this be bad etiquette? I'm assuming that since they didn't specify a name and know that I'm not seeing anyone, that they took that into consideration when writing the invite. But I don't want to be rude. What should I do?

— Uncertain Cee Cee

To see DearSugar's answer,

.

Dear Uncertain Cee Cee,

Since you won't know any of the other guests outside of the happy couple, and because the bride knows that you're currently single, I think it's likely that she's expecting you to invite a companion of some sort. Though it is more common to invite a date over a friend, I have heard of situations where platonic friends have attended weddings in lieu of a romantic interest. If you're feeling worried, I think it's perfectly reasonable to ask the bride whether or not she'll mind if you bring a friend as opposed to a date. As long as you're clear that the decision is hers and you're not trying to impose, I'm sure she'll be receptive to your request. But do keep in mind that if you have your eyes set on someone lately, a wedding is the perfect opportunity to get to know them better!

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Join The Conversation
gaelgirl gaelgirl 7 years
here's an idea: ASK lol my friend recently took me to a wedding b/c her husband was at work. it was no big deal & i've since become friends w/ the bride.
gaelgirl gaelgirl 7 years
here's an idea: ASK lolmy friend recently took me to a wedding b/c her husband was at work. it was no big deal & i've since become friends w/ the bride.
ninjastarlett ninjastarlett 7 years
I can see where the confusion might come in -- I haven't seen that phrasing on an invitation before either. If the wedding is a small party and you're pretty close to the bride, go ahead and ask for clarification. If it's a huge event, then don't bother with the details and just bring any guest you'd like. On an unrelated note, this post marks 1000 points for me and upgrade to gold status!! ^_^
ninjastarlett ninjastarlett 7 years
I can see where the confusion might come in -- I haven't seen that phrasing on an invitation before either. If the wedding is a small party and you're pretty close to the bride, go ahead and ask for clarification. If it's a huge event, then don't bother with the details and just bring any guest you'd like.On an unrelated note, this post marks 1000 points for me and upgrade to gold status!! ^_^
JaimeLeah526 JaimeLeah526 7 years
I would assume that you can bring anyone you want but you might want to ask. I know it wouldn't matter to me if you brought a friend or a man.
Asia84 Asia84 7 years
ya . . .gossipqueen. some folks are slow. she's probably a nice girl though.
gossipqueen gossipqueen 7 years
well, somebody is DENSE....partner is your + 1. bring a guest! duh!
gossipqueen gossipqueen 7 years
well, somebody is DENSE....partner is your + 1.bring a guest! duh!
snarkypants snarkypants 7 years
when this happens to me and i'm not dating someone, or when my constantly traveling bf is out of town at the last minute so i rsvp for two, and suddenly don't have a date, i bring somebody who at least knows the couple. i have never had anybody get annoyed at me for doing that, since i'm not bringing some random person that they don't know.jadore, somebody got kicked out of a wedding for not being romantically linked to a guest? that is ridiculous!!!
snarkypants snarkypants 7 years
when this happens to me and i'm not dating someone, or when my constantly traveling bf is out of town at the last minute so i rsvp for two, and suddenly don't have a date, i bring somebody who at least knows the couple. i have never had anybody get annoyed at me for doing that, since i'm not bringing some random person that they don't know. jadore, somebody got kicked out of a wedding for not being romantically linked to a guest? that is ridiculous!!!
brown_eyed_grrl brown_eyed_grrl 7 years
If they know you're single, it means you can bring a guest. I did the same thing for one of my friends who wasn't seeing anyone but also wouldn't know anyone at my wedding.
brown_eyed_grrl brown_eyed_grrl 7 years
If they know you're single, it means you can bring a guest.I did the same thing for one of my friends who wasn't seeing anyone but also wouldn't know anyone at my wedding.
jaxon jaxon 7 years
I think they just tried to be different and wrote "and partner" instead of "and guest" don't think thre is any hidden meaning behind it. No need for a phone call
0danielle0 0danielle0 7 years
I would assume you have permission to bring whoever you want, but it would only take a 5 minute phone call to make sure! :P
cubadog cubadog 7 years
If the bride and groom did not want her to bring anyone it would have just had her name on the annoucement.
SaucySassy SaucySassy 7 years
Ask the bride.
SaucySassy SaucySassy 7 years
Ask the bride.
Le-Luxe Le-Luxe 7 years
I would ask the bride. Just to be sure.
skigurl skigurl 7 years
how is the bride going to know the person you brought isn't a "romantic partner"? its really none of her business!
skigurl skigurl 7 years
how is the bride going to know the person you brought isn't a "romantic partner"? its really none of her business!
skigurl skigurl 7 years
how is the bride going to know the person you brought isn't a "romantic partner"?its really none of her business!
ajennilynrushhh ajennilynrushhh 7 years
yeah, ask the bride just to make sure.
sundaygreen sundaygreen 7 years
I think it's funny that if you took a guy with you who was just a friend, no one would ask any questions - but if you took a girl with you who was just a friend people might think it's weird. Anyway I would definitely ask her first, just in case. Usually including the "and partner" line is just a polite formality for the single folk.
sundaygreen sundaygreen 7 years
I think it's funny that if you took a guy with you who was just a friend, no one would ask any questions - but if you took a girl with you who was just a friend people might think it's weird. Anyway I would definitely ask her first, just in case. Usually including the "and partner" line is just a polite formality for the single folk.
Asia84 Asia84 7 years
Please get over yourself. There is no conspiracy. No need to clarify anything to the bride. This means bring a date/friend/jigglo/whomever. If not, it's okay.
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