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You Asked: I "Cheated" But Does It Count?

You Asked: I "Cheated" But Does It Count?

Dear Sugar,
My boyfriend and I have been together on and off for about a year. All the times we were on breaks or broke up it was because of jealousy. The second month into our relationship I was in another state visiting my best friend. We went clubbing and I danced with one of her guy friends the whole night. He asked if I had a boyfriend and I said no (stupid I know but things were on rocky ground) and he leaned in to kiss me. The night is such a blur and I can't remember if I kissed back but I decided not to tell my boyfriend. He's so jealous and even me dancing with another guy would set him off enough to break up with me. The problem is I still think of this night all the time and I am completely guilt ridden. My question is it was so early on in the relationship so did it even count as cheating? — Kissing Bandit Kassie

To see Dear Sugar's answer

Dear Kissing Bandit Kassie,

To answer your question, yes, your kiss was cheating, and I have a feeling your boyfriend would agree with me. Now, with that said, it sounds like telling your boyfriend about this drunken kiss that happened almost a year ago could lead to a breakup. If you had written me right after it happened, I would tell you to be honest with him ASAP, and although I'm not one to advocate lying, in this situation I would advise not to tell him, as long as that kiss was a onetime mistake. Since jealousy is the main point of contention for you both, what he doesn't know won't hurt him.

At the end of the day, if you're not going to be able to get the kiss out of your head, I would own up to your mistake, but if this bit of advice helps you have a little more peace of mind, I would try to just put it behind you and work on making your relationship stronger for the future. Good luck to you.


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