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You Asked: I'm Always Seeking Men's Attention

You Asked: I'm Always Seeking Men's Attention

Dear Sugar--

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. Throughout our roller coaster relationship, he has remained faithful and in love with me, whereas I have not. We broke up 2 months ago because I suggested to him that I simply was not sure about our relationship.

We still see each other and hook up even though we are not officially back together. During our break, I flirted and went on several dates with another man and did everything else but have sex. Is it still considered cheating even if I didn't have sex?

I do love my ex, but now that I ended the month long fling, I have since met another guy who I am going on a date with and fear the same ordeal will start all over again like a vicious cycle. Is it wrong that I am always seeking another man's attention? Is there something wrong with me? Why can't I be happy with just one man!!

--Dating Many Men Mia

To see Dear Sugar's answer

Dear Dating Many Men Mia-

First of all, you're either in a relationship with someone or you're not, and actions speak louder than words. Even though you "broke up" with your boyfriend, you said that you still see each other and act as if you are still together, so I bet your boyfriend thinks you two are dating. It's okay to date other people if you have that arrangement with your "boyfriend," but it sounds like things are kind of fuzzy in the communication department.

You need to decide who you want to be with and stop stringing the other men along. Have a chat with your "bf," be honest with him and tell him how you feel. He obviously loves and cares for you. I'm sure he'd be very hurt if he thought you were being faithful and found out you were actually dating other guys despite the fact that you aren't having sex with them.

Women date other guys to find the right one, I don't think there's anything wrong with that, but if you were truly in love with your ex, you wouldn't want to explore what else is out there. Listen to your gut instincts and don't force the past it if it's just not there anymore - focus on finding the one person you want to be with in the future.


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