I am a long time reader and a first time poster and my question for you is what am I doing wrong? I am a smart, pretty girl and just turned 31, but all through this time I have never had a boyfriend. I have joined some associations and I'm outgoing and funny, but every relationship I start ends in friendship. I've tried Internet dating and now my last effort is for a professional matchmaker. I am getting a bit tired of always being single. Can you help? — Boyfriend-less Becky
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Dear Boyfriend-less Becky,
Though the dating game might feel like an uphill battle, remember that finding your Mr. Right is all about timing and chance. Most of the time there's nothing you can do better or differently to make meeting someone easier, it's just a waiting game. I'm glad to hear that you've made an effort to get yourself out there but just because you haven't met someone yet doesn't mean you won't. In other words, don't give up! As E. Jean brilliantly put it, if you place yourself where there are high numbers of men, it becomes a mathematical certainty that you will meet someone.
In the meantime, make sure your on-line profile highlights all your positive attributes, and by all means hire that professional matchmaker, why not! Use every angle you can to meet someone — ask your friends, your family members and your co-workers to set you up. It's also important to remember that eligible bachelors are lurking where you'd least expect it — the grocery store, the gym, your church or temple, even at the gas station or car wash — you name it, they're there so make sure you always look presentable and have at least one eye open. You say you're outgoing, but are you approachable? It's key to smile and genuinely look happy — no man wants to approach a grump!
I also advise you to give people a chance. Even if someone doesn't seem like your type, it might behoove you to give him a shot because going back to the same (wrong) guy could be the source of the problem. Be patient Becky and as cliché as it sounds, meeting the right person will most likely happen when you're least expecting it. Good luck!