What do I do with a sister-in-law who seems to have a life mission to belittle and put me down every way possible? I don't want to hang out with her because she is so evil and rude, and then she twists everything around to make my husband think that I'm the one who's not reaching out to her. She is just such a pain!
A while back, she said that since she's older than I am she should make the first move to fix our relationship. I was open to the idea, but after a few days she was back to her old self again. I'm just so tired of this. I don't want this for my life anymore. Help!
--Tired of Her Tara
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Dear Tired of Her Tara--
No matter who the person is, a friend, relative, boss, or co-worker, if they are treating you poorly, you shouldn't stand by without standing up for yourself. Since your first attempt to mend your relationship failed, have you asked your husband to intervene? Does he have any input on how to handle her behavior towards you? There is obviously a reason why she's acting this way -- is she jealous of you or incredibly insecure? Does she feel like you "stole" her brother away from her? Is she single and wanting to be in a relationship of her own?
Regardless of her rationale, it isn't right for her to treat you this way so sit down and have a talk with her. Give her some examples of what she has said or done to hurt your feelings and ask her why she feels the need to put you down. Try talking to her in a calm manner so she won't feel attacked and come to the table with some ideas of your own on how you can better your relationship. Since she is your sister in law, you will be involved in each others lives forever, so instead of spending your time and energy disliking each other, be the bigger person, again, and work together to move past your differences. Good luck!