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You Asked: Should I Confront Her?


Dear Sugar,

My so-called best friend has never approved of my now husband. We used to work together but we're not as close anymore because I changed jobs. I started dating my husband when her and I spent a lot of time together, going out every Friday and Saturday night and we were basically inseparable. I revealed a secret of my husband's to her and she didn't approve of it.

Fast forward to now, almost two years later, we don't talk much anymore because she's always "too busy." I ran into her today while taking my grandma to the doctor. We were sitting in the same waiting room and she came over to show me a picture of one of her guy friends and told me that she wished I was single so she could hook me up with him. Inappropriate much? I was telling my sister about this and she told me that whenever she runs into her, she speaks negatively about my husband, calling him creepy and weird and says that we'd never last. Obviously all these things really hurt my feelings. Do I confront her or let sleeping dogs lie?
— Feeling Burned Becky

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Dear Feeling Burned Becky,

Let me first start out by saying that this woman is not your friend. Her childish ways are hurtful and mean so I am glad to hear that you're no longer as close. With that said, it sounds as though her actions are driven by jealousy. Since you used to be inseparable before you met your husband, she probably feels a little left out — like you chose him over her. If she was a good friend, she would be supportive of you even though she doesn't approve of your husband's secret.

Yes, trying to set you up with her friend even though you're married is wrong, but bad mouthing your husband is even worse so you can do one of two things. Let it go, be the bigger person, and have faith that anyone that knows you and your husband won't listen to the awful things this woman is saying, or you could confront her and let her know how rude and inappropriate her actions have been. Whatever you choose to do, be glad that you no longer have someone like this in your life. I am confident when I say you're much better off without her. Good luck.

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