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You Asked: Should I Fight for My Love?

Dear Sugar--

My boyfriend and I have been going out for more than half a year and
recently we've been arguing over stupid things all the time. He tells me that he thinks that I don't appreciate him as much as I used to in the beginning, and keeps asking me if we should take a break. I'm scared that If we really do end up taking a break that we will end up never getting back together and he might meet someone else which would tear me to pieces. He wants the old feelings to come back (the butterflies in the stomach feelings). We both love each other very much and don't want to hurt the other. He thinks that it's because of the stress from work that is also contributing to the negative emotions going on between us, and I agree. We see each other every week and go on regular dates, but end up getting in some kind of argument over nothing. What do you think is the best solution for this?

--Is it Over Omalee

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Is it Over Omalee--

Since you love each other so much and both want to try and make it work, then I think you should do all you possibly can to make that happen. Taking a break won't really fix your relationship. It'll probably just make you miss each other, and want to get back together. Then when you do, you'll continue bickering and having your little fights. What you need to do is get to the bottom of why you're fighting in the first place.

It doesn't sound like a lack of love between you is the problem here, but rather how you are expressing that love. Since the newness of your relationship has worn off, you've got to work extra hard to keep the passion, respect, and appreciation going. You both must go out of your way to show the other that you care.

You also mentioned that stress from work may be contributing to you not getting along. If that's the case, work on ways to de-stress from your job without letting it affect how you treat each other. Also, be honest and talk about what other factors may be affecting your relationship. As long as you both keep the lines of communication open and are willing to put all your effort to making it work, you absolutely have a fighting chance -- in other words, don't give up on love without putting up a fight. Good luck.


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