I just got into the dating cycle and a few months ago, I was at a diner and this cute man in a surgeon's uniform came up to me and wanted my phone number. He told me he was an anesthesiologist at a nearby hospital and was there for lunch. I was (and still am) skeptical about giving my phone number to strangers even if they are cute. So instead, I gave him my email address and was really hoping he would email me. I told my friend that and he thought it was equivalent to a rejection. My friend was right, he never emailed.
Is there any other way besides getting his business card and me calling him? And if that is the only way, how long do I wait before calling him? --Disappointed Deirdre
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Dear Disappointed Deirdre
I don't blame you for not wanting to give your phone number to just any man who asks for it, but I have to disagree with your friend-- offering your e-mail instead of your number is not the equivalent to a rejection. In this day and age, some people's only form of communication is via the Internet. How long ago did you give this man your e-mail? Could you be prematurely assuming the worst?
I think it is perfectly acceptable for you to ask for his number the next time you meet an eligible bachelor. I would stay away from asking for his business card though, as that can be quite an impersonal exchange. I am sure you have heard about the "three day rule," but if you want to avoid playing games right off the bat, call him whenever you feel confident and secure, regardless if it is the next day or four days later. Remember, guys have insecurities too, and if they are interested in you, chances are they'll be excited that you are taking the initiative and calling them.
As hard as it is to not take it personally when a guy doesn't call you Disappointed Deirdre, try to remember that it just means you haven't found your match yet. Since you are new to the dating scene, take your time and use this as an opportunity to explore yourself and the types of men you enjoy surrounding yourself with. Remember, the most important thing to do is have fun! Good luck.