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You Asked: Who Should I Date?

Dear Sugar,

I met a guy recently who I see every week as part of a social running group. We ended up doing a recruitment project together and we hooked up twice. After the second hook-up session, he told me he "kind of" has a girlfriend in an on-again off-again relationship who lives far away. He told me he wasn't sure what was going on with them, but he said he really enjoys spending time with me. I really like him, but I don't want to put myself out there since I know he is attached. At the same time, I'm worried that if I start dating other guys, and he decides he wants to date me, I could end up hurting someone else.

There is also another guy who I have known for a few years, who I think is interested in me. He unfortunately lives four hours away from me so I don't know what to do. Should I keep seeing guy number one but not hook up with him anymore in the hopes that he realizes how good we are together, or date guy number two and see what happens with him? — Options Olive

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Dear Options Olive,

From what you're telling me, it sounds like you're trying to decide between the better of two not-so-great situations. Since guy number one is playing games, I'd talk to him about the future of his on-again off-again relationship — perhaps he's just holding onto her for security. If he can't give you a straight answer, I think you should move on — you don't want him to continue giving you false hope.

If guy number two is really someone you think you could date, truly take the distance between you into consideration. Long distance relationships are tough, so if you're pushing something with him just to have a boyfriend, you might want to think about holding off until you meet someone close by.

Relationships should come naturally, so try not to push matters of the heart. Be true to yourself and your feelings and everything will fall into place.


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