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You Asked: Why Won't He Just Give Me an Answer?

You Asked: Why Won't He Just Give Me an Answer?

Dear Sugar--

I have asked my boyfriend if he would move in with me and he refuses to give me a YES or NO answer?

If he doesn't want to why doesn't he just say no! I don't understand.

Need to Know Nancy--

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Need to Know Nancy--

I'm sorry to say but if your boyfriend wanted to move in with you, he would have by now. For whatever reason, it sounds like he's not into the idea.

Guys do not like to talk about their feelings, and they especially don't want to upset their girlfriends (they hate "talking things out" and can't deal with crying either). He probably doesn't want to flat out say "I'm not ready to move in" because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings.

Don't take this as a sign that he doesn't care about you though. Moving in with someone is a huge commitment, and the next step is getting engaged. That idea is probably freaking him out, so if you love him and know he loves you, give him a little time and be patient. Sooner or later, he'll realize he's ready to take that next step.

On the other hand, how long have you been dating this guy? Do you think he'll ever make a solid commitment to you? You might want to think about whether or not you two are on the same page about your relationship. If you are, then I'd ease off the pressure. If you're not, then it may be time to move on. Good luck, Nancy.


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