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3 Reasons Not to Put Your Daughter on the Pill

3 Reasons Not to Put Your Daughter on the Pill

The following information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.

While many Circle of Moms members have a "better-safe-than-sorry" philosophy when it comes to making sure their teen daughters practice birth control, others, including Kristin W., are passionate in their opposition to the idea of the Pill for teens. "I personally would only put her on the Pill if it was medically necessary and only if she is abstinent. I am against putting her on the pill or any birth control of any kind," she says. Here, Kristin and other Circle of Mom members explain reasons to keep your daughter off the Pill.

(For the other side of the story, read 5 Reasons To Put Your Teen Daughter on Birth Control Pills.)

1. It Violates My Religion

Kimm W. who has a 14-year-old daughter, cites a desire to raise her daughter within the precepts of her Christian faith: "I have to say no with putting a 15-year-old daughter on the pill," she explains. "I believe teaching Godly values and having children in church where they can be around other Christian girls can help strengthen their moral values of staying pure til they are married."

Carole, another member, is in the same camp: "If I suspected that my 15-year-old daughter was sexually active, I would definitely tell her that I was concerned. I would tell her that at 15, her health, her well-being, and her potential offspring are my responsibility. I would definitely give her my moral opinion regarding pre-marital sex. We're Catholic, so I would let her know that as unrealistic as it sounds, I believe she should wait until marriage."

 

2. It Sends My Daughter the Wrong Message

Quite a few moms, including Elizabeth S. and Linda S., agree with Kimm and Carol about the need to discourage teen sex, though not necessarily for religious reasons. Elizabeth feels that putting your teen daughter on the pill

"sends the wrong message," and "gives her more permission to have sex." As Linda explains, consenting to a 15-year-old having sex is "horrible" because sex is "supposed to be the most precious moment between the love of your life, and yourself. Not a 15- and 17-year-old."

Cheryl N. adds another consideration to this list: a teenage girl is most likely not ready to take on the responsibilities of sex and its consequences.

She and other moms in this camp are far more comfortable discouraging dating and sex altogether. "I'm so old-fashioned I guess," says Cheryl, "but I have encouraged my daughter to try to at least wait until she is married." Marina feels similarly. She "would allow no dating alone yet" and no birth control, but does plan to initiate a dialogue with her daughter about love, sex, and relationships.

3. It Can Create Health Issues

Finally, several moms intend to keep their teen daughters away from oral contraceptives to avoid courting blood clots, stroke, or more subtle side effects like depression. (The widely accepted contraindications for teens considering oral contraceptives include a family history of blood clotting disorders, migraines with auras, and early onset breast cancer. See a complete list for women of all ages at the website of the American Association of Family Practitioners.) While these outcomes are rare, it's important to be aware of your family history before making a decision about birth control.

UPDATE: The New England Journal of Medicine has just published a new study that suggests that hormonal approaches to birth control that include estrogen "do indeed boost stroke and heart attack risk in the women who take them," according to ABC News.

(For the other side of the story, read 5 Reasons To Put Your Teen Daughter on Birth Control Pills.)

The preceding information is for educational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnoses, and treatment, consult your doctor.

Image Source: Jason Meredith via flickr/creative commons

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of, and should not be attributed to, POPSUGAR.

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ShannonStabbert ShannonStabbert 4 years
What the hell... Cheryl- "but I have encouraged my daughter to try to AT LEAST wait until she is married." So for her being married isn't good enough, she'd like her to wait even longer?!!? Wow, just wow. Even the Christian right has released their own studies showing abstinence only education isn't working to lower teen pregnancies and the spread of STD's, in fact it's increased the spread of STD's among those who become sexually active because they don't know how to prevent it. Trying to pretend that you're the perfect parent with the perfect child who will always listen to you is foolish and harmful. I plan to have an open and honest relationship with my daughter about sex. When, and if, she decides to become sexually active with men, we will look into the best form of birth control for her at that time. She will also know how incredibly disappointed and upset we will be if she becomes pregnant, so it's up to her to make sure that doesn't happen by accident.
MeganSprague65613 MeganSprague65613 4 years
I don't think there is a right or wrong viewpoint, I think it should depend more on the kid(If they were raised religious, is it actually something they believe or are they just trying to make us as a parent happy) and it really depends on how well you communicate with your daughter. Personally, at a young age(They learn young, when I was a kid sex-ed was taught in fifth grade) I would probably explain to my daughter(or son) that sex is special and should be done with someone they are married too... But realistically, teenager's are so hormonal, and they feel things so deeply that even with the best moral teachings and parental support there's no guarantee that they will remain celibate until they are married, so I think its really important as parents to know our kids well(and not be blinded by what they might try to tell us) and to make them feel like they can talk to us... If your telling your daughter/son that its never okay to have sex before they are married, that its wrong and immoral, chances are they aren't going to trust us enough to tell us if they do want to or have started having sex... we might not even know that they are dating someone until its too late. I think sharing personal things with our teens is a good idea(maybe we were teen parents, or know someone who started having sex at a young age and wasn't the same afterwards) Being a teenager is hard, which is why I think open communication is so important.Their bodies are their own at fifteen, and we might not like what they do with them, but at least if we know whats going on with them we can help them make good decisions.
KrystalGibson97272 KrystalGibson97272 4 years
Potential offspring?
BrandyGreen57248 BrandyGreen57248 4 years
So if you find out your kids are doing drugs do you give them clean needles? At least their being safe,right? Come on..
TiffanyHorsey TiffanyHorsey 4 years
I can respect all decisions, however if I had a pool in my backyard. And I told the kids not to go near the pool without adult supervision. I would still sign my kids up for swimming lessons just so they don't drown. Good luck being grandparents.
ElizabethMartin80997 ElizabethMartin80997 4 years
If those are the reasons not to let your teen use birth control, go ahead and stick your head back in the sand. Really. Hope you like being called Grandma.
NicoleCarpenter23467 NicoleCarpenter23467 4 years
While my daughter is only four, I currently sit in the better safe than sorry camp. BUT, I do prefer she does not have sex, nor do I even want to think about it at four.... until she is ready. I work in a high school, so I am not niave enough to believe teens aren't having sex. TRUST ME, they are!! I understand not wanting your daughter to have sex until she is ready, but if she is, I do sit in the better safe than sorry camp. However, make she doesn't have health problems, and try to not stay on for too long if you are going to go about it chemically, like the pill. I have a clotting disorder that is genetic that I didn't know about. I went on the pill when I was about to get married in my early twenties (BIG MISTAKE ALSO, but anyway...) I didn't find out until after I lost my first born, and my second was premature, that I have this clotting disorder and NEVER should have been on birth control. So now, my chances of clots are high. No one checked this, and I don't think it is protocol, but it should be. I also developed a hiatal hernia and gained a ton of weight that I still fight with this day to take off.... So, better safe than sorry, but there could be other options out there. My current form of choice is an IUD. BUT I don't know the implications in teenagers. It's minimally invasive, but you dont' have to remember to take a pill every day, and it has less chemicals in it. I can't do the chemicals because of the clotting, so that is my current choice. :D Just my two cents. I understand BOTH sides completely! Just when my daughter gets to that age, even with all the talking, coaching, and hoping and praying she doesn't, she still may. In which case, I want her protected. Oh, and by the way, let's not forget that the pill or IUD or any other form of chemical birth control does not protect against STD's, so even if they are on one of these other forms, condoms need to be pushed as well.... IF you are going to do the whole b/c thing. :D If you wanna tear me up, you can. But honestly, I do see both sices, and one person here who was raped.... that is horrific!!! If that is the case, that is a scary thing, and a very real possiblility these days, so..... I understand both sides, just want my daughter as safe as possible!! :D
auntkathy auntkathy 4 years
Having been raped at 15 yrs old at a county fair were other people was around including law enforcement. My daughters are on birthcontrol and they are less moody
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