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Are Dad's the Unappreciated Housewives of This Generation?

Are Modern Dads the Housewives of This Generation?

Women spent generations asserting their value in the home and now that some of their spouses have taken on more child-rearing responsibilities, many men are realizing how undervalued being the primary caretaker (or equally sharing the job) can be.

From Harper's Bazaar's photo shoot portraying Chris Noth as Mr. Mom to Michael Lewis's recently published book and essays on fatherhood, Home Game: An Accidental Guide to Fatherhood, men are finding that daddy duty doesn't warrant a round of applause. Lewis argues that since new-era pops are becoming more involved in their tot's lives, they have been thrown from their place of power in the household and placed in one of submissive duty, simply following their wives' childcare directives and becoming little more than the equivalent of hired help.

While moms have suffered from the unappreciated-housewife complex for years, modern dads appear to be getting a taste of it now. Are involved dads being taken of advantage of by their unsuspecting wives?


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TMommy TMommy 7 years
Funny enough I have thought about this on a personal basis for awhile and have heard my hubby voice some of these same concerns. We both work full time with him staying with our baby on Mondays and me on Fridays. We, without a doubt, split the house hold duties in half with some days me feeling like I've done more and other days I'm sure he does. It took just one day of him complaining that I hadn't been complimenting him when he had cleaned something or done a load of laundry (as if it was something special). I very swiftly pointed out that I have never seen him high-fiving me on a great load of laundry or a clean floor. I've never heard a complaint again. He quickly saw he was assigning a double standard. Now we just try our best to say thank you for what everyone does and not take anything for granted. As hard as that can be sometimes.
MaggieLei MaggieLei 7 years
I agree to a point. When men are staying home, often their partner still feels the need to tell them how to parent, take care of the house, etc, instead of letting them take charge and "own" their project. I think we are always going to take our average hard-working spouses/partner for granted no matter if they're working or staying at home. I never know what my husband is doing at work and he has no idea about my day at home. He doesn't always give me a "high five" for mopping the floor or not loosing my temper at our toddler, and I rarely congratulate him on making it through a big pile of paperwork. We make our marriage work by trying to appreciate each other. Our society as a whole doesn't seem to appreciate stay-at-home parenting- no matter who is doing it. That might be the bigger problem.
MaggieLei MaggieLei 7 years
I agree to a point. When men are staying home, often their partner still feels the need to tell them how to parent, take care of the house, etc, instead of letting them take charge and "own" their project. I think we are always going to take our average hard-working spouses/partner for granted no matter if they're working or staying at home. I never know what my husband is doing at work and he has no idea about my day at home. He doesn't always give me a "high five" for mopping the floor or not loosing my temper at our toddler, and I rarely congratulate him on making it through a big pile of paperwork. We make our marriage work by trying to appreciate each other. Our society as a whole doesn't seem to appreciate stay-at-home parenting- no matter who is doing it. That might be the bigger problem.
MissSushi MissSushi 7 years
yup, my husband is a wonderful father and he does amazing with our daughter, but the me first is always a factor. He has trouble just shutting a movie off, reading something later, etc. I think most, not all by far, just dont have the mindset most mothers have. Obvoiusly this is a generalization, but this entire article/poll can be considered one anyway.
lickety-split lickety-split 7 years
no. i don't even think that's possible (with most men). men have the "me first" mentality. they WILL work out, they WILL see that ball game,etc. women put others first, it's our nature.the dad's i know who stay home with the kids (most because of the economy) do not do it the same way moms do. that's not to say that they don't do the job just fine, but if the kids are late to school because dad is reading the sports section, hey it's just second grade. and if they send the kids to school out of uniform because they didn't get around to doing the laundry, oh well! the women i know would never do either of those things. i t take the job of being a mom very seriously, as in it's my number one priority. NOTHING else comes first. the day to day stuff is a big deal to my kids so it's a big deal to me. with the dads i know it's not a big deal, more like they don't mind doing it.
lickety-split lickety-split 7 years
no. i don't even think that's possible (with most men). men have the "me first" mentality. they WILL work out, they WILL see that ball game,etc. women put others first, it's our nature. the dad's i know who stay home with the kids (most because of the economy) do not do it the same way moms do. that's not to say that they don't do the job just fine, but if the kids are late to school because dad is reading the sports section, hey it's just second grade. and if they send the kids to school out of uniform because they didn't get around to doing the laundry, oh well! the women i know would never do either of those things. i t take the job of being a mom very seriously, as in it's my number one priority. NOTHING else comes first. the day to day stuff is a big deal to my kids so it's a big deal to me. with the dads i know it's not a big deal, more like they don't mind doing it.
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