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Glee Star Jane Lynch Reads Her Daughters' Texts and Emails

Glee Star Jane Lynch Reads Her Daughters' Texts and Emails

Is reading a child's exchanges always snooping? Glee star Jane Lynch doesn't think so. The mother of two told Prevention's Spark! Blog:

My partner and I let the girls know that we absolutely reserve the right to review texts, e-mails, address books, and content at any given time. It's a good idea to discuss this with your child in advance so it is not seen as "snooping" otherwise you lose their trust. It's also a good idea and extra safety precaution to have access to all of your child's passwords and lock-codes

Do you agree?

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sourcherry sourcherry 5 years
Ok, I admit that maybe I am seeing the world through rose colored glasses :P I guess it's because I never did anything really stupid/dangerous in my teenage years... When hormones kicked in, I was hot for the geek in class and grossed out by older guys going after girls my age! Also, my best friend was pretty levelheaded too, so I extrapolated that we were the norm. But now that I think about it, a good friend of mine, when she was around 15, used to sneak out the window at 2a.m. to meet with her boyfriend, who was a few years older than her. I would never have guessed (although I only met her a year or so after that). While her case makes me doubt my position, I remember that her parents were the snooping, "can't date until you're 18", "can't get home late" kind... I don't know if they checked her messages, but they did eavesdrop on her calls and did a bunch of other stuff... And even thought they didn't tell her, she was perfectly aware and she hid everything from them. Messages are very easily deleted :) So I can't bring myself to think that snooping, with a previous notice or not, is the answer... Even putting aside privacy or trust issues, it's pretty unreliable, so say the least... But, of course, it's a personal decision, and I can understand why parents do it!
MissSushi MissSushi 5 years
I was going to mention older men too. I was a really really good kid. Great grades, very obedient, didn't do anything wild or crazy, helped out at home, but once I hit the mid teens, and was told I coudln't date, I did anyway. I also dated several much older guys, as do so many young teens. Logic and critical thinking isn't exactly a strong point with teenagers. My mother should have been reading my emails and listening in on my calls, it would have pissed me off, but it would have nipped many potentially dangerous/stupid situations in the bud.
Girl-Jen Girl-Jen 5 years
To me, reading texts and emails is the same type of thing as asking, "Where are you going? Who are you going with? Have her mom call me. When will you be home? Who's driving? etc. etc. etc." It verifies that information.
runningesq runningesq 5 years
Jen, that's a really good idea - a way to give her privacy to express herself without the threat of harmful outside influences. sourcherry - I don't think you can always tell... there are often stories of teenagers (usually girls) with good grades, active in sports, clubs, etc., good group of friends --- who are seduced by older men. Teenagers' brains aren't fully developed and even the smart ones can make made decisions, even if they aren't the "in trouble" type.
sourcherry sourcherry 5 years
I don't think I could ever do that! I remember what it's like to be a teenager, and I remember that I'd pretty offended if my mom did anything like that, even if she warned me first. I actually remember thinking how awful it would be to have some of my friends' moms because of this! Not that I had anything to hide, I just wanted to be trusted. Personally, I think if you spend enough time with your child you can tell if they're in trouble or behaving in ways they shouldn't... But that's just me, maybe I'm being naive!...
Girl-Jen Girl-Jen 5 years
Heck yes. I am going to tell my daughter that I will (not can, not may, WILL) be reading her texts and emails and I will know her passwords. However, I will also give her a journal with a lock (either paper and hardware, or a password-protected file) that I will not have access to. That way, she can have her private thoughts and a part of her life that I am not privy to, but I will still know what her and her friends are up to.
lickety-split lickety-split 5 years
If I was concerned with my child's welfare, I would read texts, a journal, what ever I could get access to. My 11 year old is very open with her communications. So far I haven't needed to, but I certainly would. I had a friend with a 12 year old daughter who was physically very mature looking. Lots of boys were interested in her. The rule at her house was that all emails, texts and chats were read by the mom: all of them. I saw her point.
MissSushi MissSushi 5 years
Of course they need to be monitored, teenagers will do as much as they can get away with as a general rule. I totally agree that it needs to be a well known and done fact, becuase if it isn't, it IS snooping. Absolute freedom of privacy is a really horrible idea, and you will eventually run across a facebook full of nearly nude pics of your 14 yo. Almost none of my sisters friends have parents that monitor their facebooks or texts, and it's pretty bad.
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