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Mom's Friends and Her Children

Are Your Friendships Affected by Your Children?

A bit of fear creeps in when I am introducing my kids to my friends for the first time. I hope that my babes will adore my buddies (and vice versa), but there's no guarantee. I have experienced the awkward moment when my daughter wigged out as my girlfriend tried to hold her. And, watched as my child tried to strike up a conversation with friends only to have them snub her and return to other topics of interest. To be fair, they are generally self-proclaimed "no children" kind of people.

Though reactions can be chalked up to moodiness or bad timing, the bond (or lack there of) between a mom's kiddos and her friends can have a lasting impression on the adult relationship. Mamas may feel more at ease knowing her tots are surrounded by those who adore the wee company. She may stray from those that are only interested in adult time, which can be sparse. Do the relationships between your children and your friends affect your friendships?

Photo courtesy of New Line Cinema

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cristal556 cristal556 6 years
yeah I agreed with some of you, is hard to make a combination of your friends and your kids, but for the must part they turn out to like your kids after a while
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
I can totally see a lessoning of friendships with people who dont care to be around my kids and dont treat them very well or where they are forbidden topics. They are your KIDS. Why is any activity, career, interest that DOESNT involve kids ultimately more important then kids? Everyone talks about everything in their lives, and if theyve got kids, its part of their lives, just like if they have pets, or if they have are going to school or doing whatever. It's never the mark of a true friend to snub any part of your life or anything that is important to you. People are so incredibly selfish these days. I agree that adult time is equally important, but that does NOT mean that you should be forced to be friends with people that have an "acceptable list" of topics you can discuss. Everything is about moderation anyway. No one should be unable to discuss anything but one subject, whether its club hopping or their kids.
lickety-split lickety-split 6 years
disagree. i ditched anyone who didn't want to be around my children and or hear about them. being a mom isn't a part time gig for me, it's my whole entire life. we lost many "friends" when my oldest daughter was diagnosed with autism. that was fine because if the most important thing in my life doesn't register to them; they don't get me. seriously, if you had a family member on a transplant list would you be okay with "friends" not wanting to hear about it? and as far as people being "no children" kind of people, what are they 16? people grow and mature and usually move on from the selfish ME stage where only what they want is allowed to enter their world. i would have been REALLY offended if a friend had snubbed my child. that is outrageous. children are still learning how to behave, adults should already have that covered.
Moms Moms 6 years
Children definitely affect friendships. Most of my friends adore my kids and love hanging out with them. But, I do see less of my "adults only" type friends because I value my time with my kids and they come first. Though I don't take them everywhere, the hassle and expensive of hiring a sitter makes me pretty selective in things I do attend.
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