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Parents' Reactions to Leiby Kletzky Murder

Does the World Feel More Dangerous Now That You're a Parent?

The horrific story of Leiby Kletzky, the missing 8-year-old Brooklyn boy who's body was found dismembered in a neighbor's refrigerator, has shaken parents to the core. Members of the media and the parenting community will continue to debate the various aspects of the case —everything from the right age to allow a child to walk home alone to how to give kids the freedom to be kids — in the days and weeks ahead. But one quote has stuck with me since I read it (though bleary, tear-filled eyes) yesterday. Over on The Motherlode, Lisa Belkin responded to a reader's request for tips to quell fears in new parents. She said:

All I can tell you is that the world feels more dangerous and personal when you become a parent. Some days — today is one — just reading the news feels like being rubbed with sandpaper. You are more vulnerable, and more aware of that vulnerability.

It touched a nerve. Do you feel more vulnerable now that you're a parent?

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Jenny-Sugar Jenny-Sugar 5 years
Yes, so much scares me now that I'm a parent. My biggest fear is that someone will come into the house while I'm sleeping and kidnap our daughter. I live in the cutest, quietest little neighborhood, but still, I have this irrational fear and always double-check to make sure the front door and ground level windows are shut and locked. You really can't be too careful when it comes to your kids.
ilanac13 ilanac13 5 years
i don't know if it feels more dangerous- but you're certainly more aware of things and that's kind of scary. i think about how things affect my children every time i see something on the news about an unsuspecting child getting picked up, or harmed. it's scary - but it's not new scary - it's just a different scary.
cwtmommy cwtmommy 5 years
Without a doubt I feel more vulnerable. And it's not just watching the news that feeds it. It's all those crime scene and law shows I can't help watching. It just makes me realize there are more situations then I can even imagine and I get more paranoid with everyday.
amber512 amber512 5 years
I'm just an Auntie and it has caused me to be extra cautious whenever my nieces and nephews are with me. That and my obsession with L&O:SVU.
aubrey214 aubrey214 5 years
I couldn't agree more. My first child is due in October and already I can feel myself getting more paranoid about these types of things. Every decision you make from the day you become a parent is no longer made with just you in mind. Your child influences everything. Alot in life is about control. While you may not be able to control all outside forces, you can control your actions and reactions as well as the foundation of what your child learns early on. I agree with you aembry396, that we cannot live in fear of everything though. It is truly a fine balance we have to find.
aembry396 aembry396 5 years
Very much. I have always been paranoid and having a baby has not helped. However, I also learned that if I live in my fear, my daughter will live in it too....and I don't wish for her to feel hurt (actual or theoretical). It is a fine balance that parents have to find.
Natasha-Dantzig Natasha-Dantzig 5 years
Absolutely. The second P was born, I saw everything as a potential death trap. A corner is no longer a corner - it's a instrument waiting to bludgeon my baby's head. A nice old man walking a little too slowly is now a predator. It's all so scary.
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