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Would You Let Your Teen Have a Coed Sleepover?

Blame it on Angelina Jolie . . . a couple of years ago she told the British paper The Sun that at age 14, she and her then-boyfriend lived together in her mother's home "like a married couple." Jolie's interview spurred a New York Times piece on the topic of teenage sleepovers, in which author Henry Alford talked to the families of teens in an attempt to get a read on "the new normal."

As it turns out, teen couples sleeping together — and even cohabiting — under a parent's roof is no longer taboo for some modern families. Alford cited one instance in which a 17-year-old girl's live-in boyfriend even took on household chores at her mother's home, including taking out the trash and walking the family dog.

A piece on the topic referenced a study of Dutch families, as teenage sleepovers have been the norm in the Netherlands for decades. The results found that in showing respect for their teens' romantic relationships, Dutch parents enjoy strengthened communication with their kids, and the country even has a teen pregnancy rate that's four times lower than ours here in the US.

While it's all great in theory, we've got to ask: would you let coed sleepovers happen under your roof? It's a controversial topic, and we can't wait to hear what you think!

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EvangelynaThurman EvangelynaThurman 3 years
I don't see the big deal about coed sleepovers. When I was growing up I always had friends spend the night at our house or I would sleep over at theirs regardless of their gender. We weren't having wild orgies or doing anything inappropriate it was just a bunch of friends hanging out, eating pizza, watching movies then crashing out on the couch/floor/day bed. Sometimes it was a group of friends, sometimes just my best friend (a guy). I grew up in a small town with parents who trusted me so I know my experiences growing up are different than most but I think it's definitely a case-by-case thing. I wouldn't want my son having sex with anyone because I have old fashioned not before marriage values lol but I wouldn't care if he had female friends who wound up spending the night. I think it's about trust, communication and doing what works for YOUR family.
TamBiddulph TamBiddulph 3 years
It is easy for everyone to judge etc but let me tell you as a parent being forced to accept that situation or possibly lose my was definitely the better option... My teenage daughter was in a bad place due to having someone living with us do the unthinkable and we had also lost a family friend at the age of 16 so her world was chaotic to say the least.... she was 'cutting' herself and even though we were going through counselling....I was losing her....she started work at a local fast food chain when she was almost 15 which i thought would help...there she met a young man who for the first time in a very long time made her feel good about herself and she was smiling... it was a very difficult situation to contain... i would drop her at school and she would disappear to his unit ... i would never know where she was .... i would scale the side of his apartment putting my own life in danger just trying to find her.... eventually i asked the police for help... they called her in and spoke to her.... then they went and paid him a visit.... we tried to keep them apart but in the end I was making it worse.... I sat with him and talked about what he could lose continuing the relationship.... he looked me straight in the eye and said ' i love her so much i am prepared to go to jail to be with her..' let me tell you that was not the answer I was expecting... so there it was... for the sake of all of us... i began to accept the relationship.... there was a time when his units lease was up and he had to leave so upon speaking with his mother who lived in a different state...we agreed for the short term it would be ok for him to stay at our house... at least I knew my daughter was safe.... and where she was... yes they were already sleeping together so it was pointless trying to pretend they didn't. Funnily enough.... once all the 'fight' wasn't there....she realised the relationship wasn't really what she wanted....and not long later he moved out and life continued on....and now 7 years on she has a wonderful boyfriend and she has her life on track.... and a very positive future.... so what I am saying is... nothing is black and white.... a few people alienated me for the decision I made but in my heart I know at that time... it was our best option...and i do not regret it. Sometimes making such a fuss just makes it more to fight for... and clouds the reality of where they are at. Yes I am a single Mum... her Father left us when she was 5 and chose to walk in and out of her life as he pleased (which never helped the situation) so when there is only you to make the big decisions... you just have to do what is right for YOUR family....and hope for the best.
suzannemshaffer suzannemshaffer 3 years
It baffles me that 7% are on the fence! The answer seems pretty simple!
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