At an exclusive screening in New York City this afternoon, we got the inside scoop from the author/designer/reality star and her husband about life after their children, Liam, 3, and Stella, 1. Here are the highlights:
On marriage after kids.
Dean: You really have to have a willingness to communicate, listen, make compromises and sacrifices and just work together. It’s a really difficult thing with careers and kids and the relationship sometimes gets put on the back burner. And you both have to have that willingness to say, "This is going to take some work."
Tori: Before kids, you say — and we said the same thing — our relationship will never change. And then you have little beings you have to provide for and you have to make them a priority for a certain amount of time. And it's true, when kids come, they take over and you forget you have to work on communication and it takes work, and it would be nice to get back together.
To see what else the couple had to say about family life,
On how Tori juggles being a working mom.
Tori: The cameras are not necessarily the problem. We have a lot going on. For me personally, and as a woman, a wife and as a mom, I’m trying really hard to find that balance. I want it all. I want to be that stay at home mom, have dinner waiting when you get home at night, taking the kids to carpool. I hear women say, "I dropped the kids off and then I had time to go to a yoga class." I’m like, "What’s that like?" It all sounds so inviting to me. And on the other hand, I want to run an empire! I love all my business ventures. I’m struggling every day on how to blend the two. We get through it, mostly on adrenaline. I would love to find a way to have more family time.
On getting Tori time.
Tori: That’s something I’ve been struggling with. I give everything to my kids and my husband and my work and then there’s nothing left for me. That’s something that’s a goal of mine, because I have lost that.
Dean: It's really important to do those things that you can identify with, that kind of make you, you. I’m blessed that I have the motorcycle racing to do that.
Tori: But my kids are my hobby. It’s so hard when you’re a mom because if you have any free time, you want to do stuff with them.