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When Being a Mom Makes a Woman Rude

Mind Your Mom Manners: Rude Things Mothers Do

Whether we want to admit it or not, motherhood changes us all. Most of the life alterations are for the better, but some things are for the worse. Though they may be unintentional or unavoidable, when children come first — a few common courtesies are tabled. Check out the things many mamas end up doing.

Forget about thank-you notes: We crossed all our "ts" and dotted every "i" in a timely matter pre-tot, but once babe took over our thank-you notes took a hiatus or fell into the "better late than never" category.

Eat and run: We enjoyed leisurely meals and lingering conversation while eating out with friends, then children came and the words "check, please!" followed by an abrupt exit became more common.

Interrupt conversations constantly: It's almost impossible to concentrate and express complete thoughts while carrying on a conversation when your tots are asking for help, swinging from the monkey bars or screaming.

Space out: We may be in a business meeting or engaging in chitchat, but our minds wander elsewhere — to the carpool rotation, the permission slip left on the kitchen counter or our infant's diaper rash.

Pull the mom card: Never missed a birthday fete, holiday soiree, or girlfriend get together before baby, but now our lil ones take priority and hiring a pricey sitter or gussying up after a sleepless night doesn't sound at all appealing.

To see the rest of our list,


Shout in public: Hitting the mall for a shopping stroll changes when tots are in tow. Mums who never said boo before baby suddenly find themselves frantically shouting safety precautions, "Joey, do NOT step on that escalator — you will fall!" or "OMG! Where's Hannah? She was just right next to me. HANNAH? HANNAH?"

Stroller rollover: Size does matter when it comes to strollers, and since stores have aisles that barely accommodate them, it's impossible for a mama to see every foot or knee cap that is in the way when she swings the buggy around to make an exit. Unfortunately and unintentionally, a stranger's toe occasionally falls victim to the rubber wheel.

Talk, talk, and talk about their tots: Once a woman has kids, they inevitably become the topic of chitchat. What can possibly top having created human beings?

Hold up the line: Whether mom's in the bathroom stall or the dressing room, peeing and slipping into clothes with an entourage takes a bit longer — especially when the kiddos expect to be entertained.

Are tardy: Getting out the door suddenly takes a little or a lot longer. Last-minute diaper blowouts, spit-up stains, and tot tantrums can set mamas back no matter how much time they've allotted.

Image Source: Thinkstock
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amandachalynn amandachalynn 6 years
I will NEVER ask someone if they have kids. A friend of mine lost her 2 year old a few months back. I can not imagine how she would feel or what kind of spot she would be put on with that question. Right now I am pregnant, I have my son who's almost 5, and I watch my friends 8 month old twins and her 10 year old. I am never late! I start heading out the door 30 minutes before I need to, and that's only if I'm going somewhere that takes 5-10 minutes to get to. My dentist is 20 minutes away, so I start leaving and hour before so I can account for traffic, or anything else. I have never liked to be late, even before kids. Better early than late.
Kelly-O Kelly-O 6 years
Have to agree, I think the majority of this list is ridiculous - of course you're going to take longer in the bathroom if you have a small child or two with you. Of course you're going to have interruptions when you have an infant or small child running around who may not yet understand the concept of interrupting Mommy. Yes, I do believe that it's important to build time in your schedule so you're not constantly late, but I also think that most people understand when a child makes you late from time to time. So long as it's not a consistent thing, it can be worked around. I know when this baby comes, my whole world is going to change. It already has. I would hope that people understand this little girl I have waited so long for is one of the most important things in my life, and I want to talk about her. I don't think that's rude, just sharing the good stuff with friends and family.
amber512 amber512 6 years
I second your comments. While as far as I know nothing is seriously wrong with me, my husband and I have been trying for over three years and haven't been successful. Often, moms just walk away after hearing that.
Rjs-baby-girl Rjs-baby-girl 6 years
I'm not American so I still don't totally get the tradition of thank-you notes, as where I live people don't send thank-you notes except after a wedding. I don't think that one is rude, especially if the person called me on the phone to thank me or did it in person. When you send a gift, it's because you feel good and want to make someone happy. I don't have a kid but I don't think the aforementioned behaviour are particularly rude, it's normal for the life to change after having a baby and making sure they are safe, parents are more tired, etc. However, I do think that parents who talk non-stop about their offspring are annoying. There's a woman I was friends with a couple years ago that had a baby and even with her kid was 1-2 years old she kept talking about her constantly like nothing in the world existed besides her. She wasn't asking how I was doing or what was new with me, all our encounters were discussions about the wonderfulness of her daughter. I'm sorry but that was rude behaviour.
amber512 amber512 6 years
Interrupting conversations constantly: exactly why I prefer to talk to some of my mom friends in person rather than on the phone!!
schnappycat schnappycat 6 years
I agree that most of the things on the list aren't necessarily rude. However, I DO think that being constantly late is rude, especially if others are waiting on you. Kids or not, there is usually little excuse for being late and causing other people to wait for you is very inconsiderate. And this is coming from someone with a 2 yo and an infant. Sure, unexpected things come up, but that is why you always allow extra time. It obviously does take tons of extra time to get out the door, but if you plan correctly, it should be doable to arrive somewhere on time. And I also think forgetting thank-you notes is inexcusable if you have always done them before. It really only takes a few minutes to write one. In the time I took to write this post, I could have jotted one out. Which reminds me that I actually have one to do right now! :)
isahrangme isahrangme 6 years
COMPLETELY agree with stephley. people go on and on about ANYTHING, whether it's kids or not! kids, family, family gossip, work, etc. and yea, jenni5's list is actually rude, while the stuff in this list is normal and, in my opinion, expected. i wouldn't expect a mother to put me and my party above the needs of her kids. the mothers who DON'T put their kids as a top priority are the ones who actually tend to be RUDE in other aspects of life (ok maybe this is a huge generalization...)
stephley stephley 6 years
I think the behaviors Jenni5 lists are rude - most of the behaviors in the article are necessary. I enjoy long lunches with friends, but have to cut them short for work - is that rude or reality? Missing a party because you're working on a project for your job isn't considered rude, why is it rude to be too tired to party because you're being a responsible parent? People go on and on about work - is that better than talking about children?
jenni5 jenni5 6 years
I have some that I think are a bit worse... -When other mom's shove their kids to the front of lines at amusement parks, character greets, etc., while shoving your kids and you out of the way. -Running other people over with their strollers (extra points when they are walking with a friend with a stroller and the 2 of them take up the entire walkway and neither moves). -Not cleaning up the messes their children make (at restaurants, stores, friends homes). -Not watching their children at playgrounds when they know that their kids hit other children or take their toys.
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