One of the decisions every pregnant woman eventually makes is who she wants to have by her side in the delivery room. And since giving birth is an incredibly personal as well as momentous event, it can be complicated decision. Aside from doctors and nurses, who should be present? To help you decide, we've rounded up several different perspectives and advice from Circle of Moms members who've been through labor.
Significant Others Only
Many Circle of Moms members chose to have only their husband or partner be in the delivery room. "We wanted our special moment of meeting OUR son the first time to be just about us, and no one else," Ashley J. recalls. "We had an awesome delivery, it was a fun experience for me, and my husband was very attentive and a great labor coach. I'm very glad that I did it this way."
"I Needed My Mum"
On the other hand, not all moms trust their husband or partner to be able to come thtough for them in the delivery room. Jess L. shares: "I needed my mum because I knew my partner would be no good under pressure....My mum was my rock, honestly. My partner was crying in the corner! My mum cleaned me up when I vomitted all over the place, she held my hair, rubbed my back, held the vomit bag." Veronica H. agrees: "I would not have made it without my mom. She was such a calming person to have there for me. I had both my husband and my mom with me."
A Party in the Delivery Room
While spouses and moms are obvious candidates, they're certainly not the only ones asking for admittance. Circle of Moms members share stories of sisters, aunts, cousins, mothers-in-law, and roommates who are all clamoring to witness the delivery room action. Roxanne D. recalls: "I had an argument with my baby's father about having HIS mother in the delivery room with me." And Maggie E. shares: "I had my husband, my mom, my sister, two cousins, and a video camera. It's all what you're comfortable with."
Deciding What You Want
Maggie's final point ("it's all about what you're comfortable with") has been echoed by countless Circle of Moms members. Try to realistically assess the kind of support and experience you want in the delivery room, and go from there. Will your husband be a great coach during labor or faint at the first sight of blood? Will your mom help keep you calm and provide a "been there before" perspective or will she irritate you? And in general, do you prefer privacy or to have a cheering squad around you when going through an intense experience? Krista D. explains: "This is one decision that has to be left up to you and your feelings. Are you and your mom close? Would she be supportive? Don't listen to what she is telling you that she wants, do what you feel is right for you at that moment."