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my boyfriends fantasy is sex with his mom

during  recent love making with my bf, he wanted to pretend i was his mom. it totally turned me off!, but i didn't let him know that, i thought that was totally off the chain(not normal).  any advice???

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xxxrated xxxrated 6 years
I'm shocked that some of YOU are so shocked. I'm an independent phone sex provider. I cannot begin to tell you how many successful, well adjusted men fantasize about sex with their "mothers." Not actually with their exact mother ... but with one they imagine to be their mother, for lack of a better way of putting it. Fantasy IS just that, fantasy ... it's not "creepy" it's not "weird" and their is nothing to "run" from here. Open your minds and try to understand other human beings for goodness sake. Google a little something called the "love map" and get a better understanding on the very core of human beings. It's pretty damn imporant and worthy of more than your small-minded "judgements" for all of you who fell into that category.
Layla75 Layla75 6 years
lilica lilica 6 years
I'm sorry...but this is sick... I'm not one to judge, but you need to get away from him,leave a shrink's phone number on your way out.
Torysgirl91 Torysgirl91 6 years
Fallen- I love you so much for knowing Dan Savage. He is a god. And little atheist me does not use that term lightly.
Torysgirl91 Torysgirl91 6 years
Unfortunately, this is not a totally uncommon male fantasy. Ever hear of the Oedipus/Oedipal complex? If you go to any porn/erotica site, you will find ridiculous amounts of stuff relating to incest. I know for a fact that my father fantasizes about his mother (it's a really long and disturbing story). Yes, it's creepy...but it's actually fairly common.
vmruby vmruby 6 years
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.....
justanerd1975 justanerd1975 7 years
I said I hoped this was a joke. This is not normal, you know it's not. Something is very wrong. I don't even want to know what other surprises this guy has floating around in that mind of his. And I'm sticking to that! Not trying to be mean, but this is def. not normal. And sexual devience is the last thing you need in a marriage.
Fallen85 Fallen85 7 years
ladywishes: "God help his daughers if he ever has any..." What kind of ignorant bullsh!t comment is that? He has a fantasy about his mom (aka: Oedipus complex - VERY common) so automatically he's an incestuous pedophile?? God help anyone you give advice to. Remove the stick out of your a$$, open your mind and start googling. Jumping to the worst conclusion over something so small is pretty dispicable. You should be ashamed. You're the type who would shame children into being virgins until they're 40.
sparklestar sparklestar 7 years
bowyerlori bowyerlori 7 years
WOW. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. Sickening.....
ladywishes ladywishes 7 years
EEk!! I would have to agree with Janneth on this one.. run, run far far away. God help his daughters if he ever has any...
janneth janneth 7 years
NO, sorry but it is weird. Get away from him. Stop trying to rationalize it, and just think clearly about it for a moment. And do you really want advice from the "queen of kink"? On the other hand, if you don't see it right away, maybe you and this guy will be happy together.
gingerlea gingerlea 7 years
I am really surprised at the amount of interest this topic got, not so much here, but i did post at another forum and it was quite the discussion. although everyone gave me kind advise,(few naysayers) I'm beginning to realize that I am not the only one who had this experience. Which actually makes me feel better! thank you again for all your advice. by the way Dan Savage didn't get back to me as of yet.
NorthsideGirl NorthsideGirl 7 years
So sorry, Ginger, it looks as though someone stated "I hope this isn't a joke" - then it escalated from there - like a snowball effect. So, then, back to the original problem. I had stated that it is normal and even 'fun' to have fantasies and many couple 'play act' in bed, but if the topic HE enjoys makes YOU uncomfortable - just talk to him and let him know. The last thing, I am sure, that he wants is for you to be uncomfortable during sex with him. If he is the great man you describe, he will understand. The two of you should be able to come up with a compromise or a different fantasy all together that you BOTH are comfortable with. And, THERE ARE A LOT of scenarios the two of you could experiment with and ENJOY! Good luck to you.
gingerlea gingerlea 7 years
I just wanted to say thank you for the advice. I will forward the question to Dan Savage to see what he says on the subject.
gingerlea gingerlea 7 years
thank you for all your advice. actually this is not a bs post. this actually happened to me. My Bf is acutally a very handsome and well respected physician, and not at all strange in any way(except until this happened) so it is hard for even me to imagine this. I will take your advice and forward the post to Dan Savage.
NorthsideGirl NorthsideGirl 7 years
This was a joke? Wow, get a life I guess...
Muirnea Muirnea 7 years
I think it's BS too. And if it's not...that's just gross and creepy. Who wants to imagine sex with a parent!? uggg...
jazzytummy jazzytummy 7 years
I agree with R&R...I think this letter is BS. If it isn'
RockAndRepublic RockAndRepublic 7 years
Ugh! I hate fake letters!
justanerd1975 justanerd1975 7 years
oh. my. .... please tell me this is A JOKE!?! If this is not a joke, please get away from this deviant little man. This is just wrong, and since every serial killer has had wierd--deviant!-- sexual fantasies, I'd say RUN!!!
kurniakasih kurniakasih 7 years
I agree with Fallen. Fantasy is just a fantasy (unless you see him trying to hit on mom..) and many people have different fantasy as well as fetish. Hey, whatever rocks your boat. I have to admit since that's not my type of fantasy, that'd probably make me feel a little weird at first, so I have to commend you for actually going through with it in tact (if it were me, I probably couldn't stop lmao, feeling all bizarre). Maybe Gscott has a point, he likes the feeling of being a 'naughty boy' or a 'son' esp. if his mom is the type to 'nag' or 'baby' him, he'd like you to do stuffs to him that way, not really like his mom, just be that nagging, mommy type woman in the bedroom. Yeah, forward this to Dan Savage. I'd like to know what he'd say. :D
GScott86 GScott86 7 years
Creepy. You could try being more of a mom than a girlfriend. Maybe he's into being dominated... some guys like it rough, being spanked, etc. o_O
PinkNC PinkNC 7 years
I agree with what *Fallen85* expressed. That is strange, talk to him about, women have had stranger request in bed just to get turned on I'm sure, and it is a good thing you didn't make him feel insecure about it. Good luck!
Fallen85 Fallen85 7 years
Totally what I was thinking Pop!! This chick is totally GGG! I love it. Send your question to Dan Savage ( see what he thinks. He is the queen of all kink! Personally, I would let it go. He's banging you, not his Mom. A fantasy is just that... a fantasy. Pretend. Doesnt mean he actually wants his mom, just means that it's taboo and the idea of it (not the actual act) turns him on. Some girls get turned on by the idea of rape, does that mean she actually wants to be raped? Hell no. Have an open mind and unless he starts hitting on his mom I'm sure there's no real issue here. I love that you did not freak out on him and make him feel insecure about it though! You go girl.

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