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Dating Someone With Debt

Readers Have Mixed Feelings About Debt-Laden Guys

So you're on a date with a guy, and you find out he owes $190,000 in student loans. Would you drop him like a hot potato? I asked readers if they would find it a turnoff and it was interesting to see the mix of opinions they had on whether the massive debt is a deal breaker:

 

  • YES! Sorry but thats the truth coming from me! I worked hard not to accquire a massive debt on my behalf! —
  • This wouldn't turn me off as long as he is being mature about it and has career ambitions and prospects, and a reasonable plan to pay that debt off. Many of us come out of university owing large loan debts, so I don't think he is the only one out there facing this issue. —
  • 190k with no graduate degree to show for it? Yes, I'm sorry that is a problem. Unless you have an agressive plan to pay it off (and even if you did it would take several years) I would have a hard time taking on that responsibility. Because when you marry someone, you take on their debt and it doesn't matter if it's student loans, credit cards, or gambling. Debt is debt -- it all has to be paid back or you are faced with the consequences. — Anonymous
  • Debt isnt so much a turn off as lack of career ambition is. I see that debt the same as I would see it if he had invested 190k in a company. It's an investment in his future. —

    To find out what other readers had to say, read on.

  • If he's financially responsible, then I wouldn't have a problem dating. Now if he was taking me out on extravagant dates, then I'd question whether or not all that debt was student loans. —
  • My husband has a TON of student loan debt we are paying down and we are almost finished with his credit card. I wasn't aware of the full extent of the debt before we were married. I did know he had debt, but he was in charge of paying it and I never thought about it. Once I started writing the checks to all of our bills I realized how much it was. But then I just figured out a plan to pay it back. If I had known beforehand I wouldn't have wanted to marry him any less. —
  • Yep, that much debt would probably be a dealbreaker. You have to wonder about what kinds of behaviors got him into that much debt to begin with. Student loans are one thing; expensive cars, CC debt, gambling, etc. are a whole other ballgame. —
  • Well, it depends on his education level. Did he go to grad school? Also, it depends on his "great career prospects." —
  • 190k is a lot of money. Although, I think most people with a college degree and/or graduate degree have some debt. — Baconlover
  • No. Why would it affect me? It would be a turn off to have someone I'd just met tell me their financial situation; good or bad. Also, doubt that this man will go without sex for the period necessary to pay off that amount. So then what???? —
  • Source: Thinkstock
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