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Divorce When Spouse Lied About Money Problems

Would You Divorce If Your Spouse Hid Money Problems?

Bankruptcy came as a surprise to NJ housewife Teresa Giudice. One day she was enjoying her suit of armor and Sea-Doo Bombardier X20 Jet Boat, and next thing she knew she had to auction it all off. "Joe didn’t want to worry me," she told the women of The View yesterday. "He didn’t tell me at first because he thought things were going to get better." They didn't.

The loss of trust resulting from financial dishonesty can be just as damaging as infidelity. The life you thought you had and that your spouse led you to believe was secure suddenly disappears. It's just another reason to stay on top of your own finances, but even if you try to maintain some financial independence, secret debts or a failing venture can still have serious repercussions. It could even be reason for divorce. As for housewife Teresa's, she's OK with her husband's omissions, saying if anything the eventual bankruptcy brought her and Joe closer. These two might really be meant for each other.

Photo courtesy of Bravo

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GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 5 years
I agree -- it would depend on the severity of the problem. Personally, it would be hard for hubbie to be financially dishonest with me. I handle all our personal finances, and I monitor our credit files. I would even know if he went to a strange ATM for any financial transaction. :) One time, many years ago (early in our marriage), I called him on that. Not only did I question him financially, I asked for his motivation. I asked, "Why were you in that part of town at that time??" The ATM transaction indicated the area it was in. LOL Incidentally, my husband joked that if he ever had an affair, his mistress had to pay for everything, as his wife behaves as a forensic accountant when it came to the personal finances. If the affair left any financial trail (on his part), I would find out. :) ;)
jazzytummy jazzytummy 5 years
That chick in that show is basically trailer trash and spent money like water in order to give herself some kind of weird social status. To be that clueless about finances, when you are spending millions of dollars on useless things only highlights her stupidity and she gets no sympathy from me. Seriously, I would never become that financially dependent on a man. They may keep money problems from you to "spare your feelings", but ultimately their financial disaster is your burden....I would have a tough time forgiving that, especially if we had kids.
amber512 amber512 5 years
I wouldn't just up and leave, but some things would have to be SERIOUSLY discussed.
Spectra Spectra 5 years
Before we got married, we revealed our money situation to each other very openly...all student loans, credit cards we had, etc. We've always shared everything with each other when it comes to money. If my husband ever started taking out a lot of loans and stuff, I'd be very upset about it. I'm not sure that we'd divorce, but we would definitely fix it.
GirlOverboard GirlOverboard 5 years
Because hiding financial issues to the point of basically ruining the family is the reason why my husband's parents are currently living with us while we help them get out of debt, if I found out my husband were hiding financial issues it would damage the relationship a lot because it meant he learned nothing from the experience. Honestly, I don't think there are many things in this world that could tear me from him, but if he put us in a situation so bad that we couldn't recover, I would seriously consider it. With how much financial frustration we've already felt I just wouldn't be able to take it anymore. Fortunately, we've already learned a *lot* about how to handle our finances just by learning from their mistakes and by helping them recover. In fact, we've made it work for us by essentially taking them on as room mates - it may up the utilities bills, but rent is much cheaper and keeping them with us prevents the same mistakes from happening. We've already "lent" them way too much money in the past to avoid eviction to let that happen again!
postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 5 years
It would really depend on the situation/severity, like chloe bella said. I would feel betrayed, but I think I could work it out depending on the situation. If he was blowing all his money on coke and strippers, for example, I would break it off, haha
skigurl skigurl 5 years
I would never allow myself to be that in-the-dark about money issues, but I agree, it would be a huge betrayal, especially if he was living lavishly. It would all depend on the situation, though.
chloe-bella chloe-bella 5 years
I agree with SKG, in that I don't think you can draw a hard and fast line. It would totally depend on the circumstances and the severity of the situation. Maybe your spouse made a bad business deal and is embarrassed about it, and thinks he can recoup the money somehow without you knowing. If there was no malicious intent behind it and it was a one-time thing, then I probably wouldn't want to end a marriage over it - isn't part of being in a long-term relationship realizing you have to deal with problems, instead of just bailing? On the other hand, if he was doing something totally sketchy, like going around and making secret purchases, gambling irresponsibly, etc., to the point where he's showing a blatant disrespect for you, I think that would almost always be a dealbreaker. So I guess for me it would depend on why he didn't tell me, how much money was involved, and whether he eventually came clean or actively lied to me.
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