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What Was Your Wedding Budget?

Your Two Cents: What Was Your Wedding Budget?

If you're going to the chapel and you're gonna get ma-r-r-i-ed, chances are someone is going to get a budget-breaking bill. After newly engaged couples settle from the excitement of the proposal, the reality of the cost of a wedding sets in.

Asking friends and family what they spent on their weddings as a reference point isn't always appropriate, but we can share secrets among Sugar friends, right? Inquiring minds want to know: what was your wedding budget ballpark — or how much do you imagine it will be?

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danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
I feel 34 sometimes :P I guess it comes down to me not feeling appreciated or respected.
totygoliguez totygoliguez 5 years
Dana, you make yourself sound as if you were 34. You are still VERY YOUNG.
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
Thank You for the post :) Very helpful, I can tell you're in the same boat as me almost exactly. He recently took a short trip to CA and the entire time, said he missed me and made him appreciate me more. Who knows, maybe it will happen soon. I would love to take a trip to Cali, but I can't afford it (I had a ton of vet and car bills come up at once, my cushion/trip money is gone) and I have 5 animals I can't leave behind for more than a few days. It looks like we're going to be moving in 3-4 weeks, hopefully we can resolve things before then. Thanks again :)
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
I think that's just an excuse guys use for being lazy. Asking for a commitment is not nagging, it's communicating about what you want in life. When my guy and I got together, we talked about marriage in passing. He said he wanted to wait until he was done with school and in a career first. He told me after that, he would be ready. I didn't "nag" for more than 3 years, time came and went. A guy wants to live together, have sex, live like a married couple without the wedding, that's wrong if he knows that's what the woman wants (and visa versa). It's not about the ring, it's about the commitment. I didn't start really asking for an engagement until last summer, before moving in together, after almost 5 years together. 4 1/2 years is plenty of time to decide and plan the proposal. At this point, I don't even care, I'm not really excited about it. Another one of my siblings is getting divorced, they got married a few months after I started dated my guy (they were together for 5 years before). 2 family marriages, 4 kids, and 2 divorces, all before I get even a proposal. Kinda crazy :P It's okay, I would rather take it slow and learn from their mistakes than do it myself.
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
Hi Anon 18! I actually tried that, more than once and for a long period of time. 2 weeks ago I told him he has to decide, either I'm going home to California or we're getting engaged. I can't put my life on hold any longer and I miss my family terribly (haven't met my new niece yet, he got to this weekend). I'm unemployed and have more than 10k in total debt, I have work in California, there's nothing here for me to do (and we're moving soon). I know people say you can't give ultimatums, but if he wants me to be with him, he'll take actions towards making it official. We had a long talk and worked some things out. He's told me many times over the years "I absolutely want to marry you, I just don't know if I'm ready now." And most recently it's been "I just haven't thought about it much." It hurts that he puts his career before me. I've made more than enough compromises for him, he hasn't made any for me. It's his turn. Marriage is important to me, he needs to actively take the steps towards being ready. I told him he's more of a taker than a giver, he realized that and wants to change. I'll be doing dishes and rather than help, he'll keep doing what he's doing and say "You don't have to do that, I'll help," then not get up. I know a lot of people like this and I don't mind doing the housework, as long as he makes my priorities his as well. Hope that makes sense :) He's a good guy, just trying to figure things out. The odd part is about a year ago I told him about my friends FH and how he waited 8 years to propose, he had some negative things to say about him for dragging his feet... yet we're nearing 5 1/2 years, not far off from 8. He's getting it now. He needs to start thinking "How is this going to benefit US" rather than "How is this going to benefit ME." :)
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
:hug: Thanks, I hope so too. When he gets home today, I'm going to tell him he has to propose soon or I'm going to marry my other boyfriend. :P
Liss1 Liss1 5 years
Dana - Yes we lived together, i moved in with him my senior year of high school, he graduated the year before me. I didn't have the best home life so it was better for me and our relationship not to live with my mom anymore. So we lived together pretty early in our relationship. i don't really know why we waited, we just decided one day to get married and shortly after he surprised me with a ring and a proposal, even though we were already engaged, i guess just to make it official :) I hope you get engaged soon. Good luck! :)
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
@skigurl - I absolutely want to marry him, so I don't want to walk away, but I can't wait forever. I talked to him after posting this, hopefully we'll go in the right direction soon. So many people are getting married around us, that doesn't help. @ Liss - I met my guy in college, I'm almost 24, he's 25. I know another couple who just got engaged after being together for 8 years (they even own a house together). She wanted an engagement, he didn't. It's just hard when one wants it so bad and the other doesn't. I moved halfway across the country, left my family, friends, job, and hometown, I deserve something in terms of a commitment. The weird part is, he's big on saving money and spending wisely... if we got married, we would get more a month (he's in the military), I would qualify for better school loans/scholarships, I could shop on base, I would get medical insurance, we could live on base, to name a few. Those aren't the reasons to get married, but when you have love, those are just added bonuses :) If you know you want to marry someone (he has said to me many times that I'm The One), why wait if it's costing you money? I told him.... Justice of Peace, let's go! :p Did you live together? Why did you wait 9 years, just curious?
Liss1 Liss1 5 years
Dana, if it makes you feel any better my husband and i were together for 9 years before we got married. But i didn't mind since we've been together since high school so we were only 26 when we got married.
skigurl skigurl 5 years
so frustrating...and if you really love the guy you don't want to walk away from a good thing :( well i feel good things are coming for you!!
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
In the meantime, I'm just semi-planning a wedding for when the time comes. Whether it's him or not :p
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
You're right. 75% will call me an idiot for sticking around so long with false promises (he's told me numerous times over the last few years that he's going to propose soon, even to pick out a ring... early last year), some will call me selfish for even asking, saying I'm being too pushy. People who know us say to just wait until he's ready, but I'm not getting any younger (and I'm without insurance). He says he wants to marry me, then he says he's not ready, the next day he is, the day after that he isn't. I've flat out said "5 years together, s*** or get off the pot!" :p I'm so torn on this issue myself. I moved out of state to be with him too. Most recently, he's said that he's seriously considered proposing. Even more seriously than before. I'll believe it when I see it.
skigurl skigurl 5 years
dana, 50% of the posts will be "break up with the bastard" no matter how good of a guy you make him seem ;)
magickalrealism magickalrealism 5 years
We flew in immediate family to Vegas on a travel package. $10K includes time off work and the honeymoon. Got my wedding dress for $75 at Fashion Bug, got husband fitted for a $300 suit that he can reuse, and got a travel agent that worked for the city of Las Vegas. Ka-ching!
Pistil Pistil 5 years
Yeah, that is true
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
I would, but some of the people who reply to those are flat out mean! I'm scared.
Pistil Pistil 5 years
dana, sounds like an issue you could take to group therapy (not the wedding posts, the boyfriend who hasn't proposed)
danakscully64 danakscully64 5 years
All of these wedding posts (over and over and over and over) make me want to crawl into a hole and die. I've been waiting 5 years for my guy to propose, I can't take this anymore. Can we please have a separate Wedding Sugar so I can visit it when I feel like it? If I ever get married, my parents are giving me about $8,000, I'm sure the grooms side will contribute too. I didn't vote though, since I won't know until the time comes.
Spectra Spectra 5 years
I think we spent a grand total of about $6K or so. We did a lot of things ourselves and only invited about 80 guests. The more people you invite, the more you're going to spend on the food.
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