Nov 26, 2008 -
GOODNESS IS THE ONLY INVESTMENT THAT PAYS!!!!
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Getting a hairdryer through customs...
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> A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favour?'
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Nov 16, 2008 -
IN AN EMAIL I RECEIVED....IT'S FUN TO SHARE!... :D
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)
If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
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Nov 15, 2008 -
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips on the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
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Jan 18, 2009 -
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Nov 16, 2008 -
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: 'Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?'
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Nov 16, 2008 -
An elderly man in West Virginia had owned a large farm for several years.He had a large pond in the back.
It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts,and some apple, and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he Hadn't been there for a while, and looked it over.
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Nov 16, 2008 -
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.
I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'
'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.
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Nov 16, 2008 -
LOL.....OMGOSH....AN OTHER EPISODE OF KIDS SAY THE DARNEST THINGS...HAHAHA
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed
he had his collar on backwards.
The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards.
The man, who was a priest, said, 'I am a Father.'
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Nov 16, 2008 -
> Have a wee chuckle to brighten your day..........
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> Local Pastor explains that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more.
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> There is a hush within the congregation...
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Nov 16, 2008 -
LOST IN THE DARNDEST PLACES:
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: 'They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!' she cried.
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