PopSugar

What to Bring to an Engagement Party

TresSugar — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 15:30:00 -0700

xlarger" height="400" width="266">So you got invited to an engagement party. Fun! But what should you bring?

First things first: you are almost never required to bring a present to an engagement party. In fact, bringing something too extravagant could be considered poor taste. The couple will get plenty of gifts at the wedding, so you don't want to overdo it at the more informal gathering.

But, if you're like me, you probably want to share your excitement for the couple by offering them a thoughtful gift. Here are some things to keep in mind:

Lighten up: Depending on the couple's sense of humor they may get a chuckle out of a book like Honeymooners Forever: Twelve Step Marriage Survival Guide.
DIY: You could team up with friends to make a photo memory book of good times shared among the couple and your group of friends. Or you could put together a book of well-wishes from the guests and present it to the couple.
Keep it simple: a nice bottle of wine or a fancy box of chocolates shows that you're in the mood to celebrate.
Stick with the planning theme: Planning a Wedding to Remember: The Perfect Wedding Planner would be thoughtful and useful.
Be sincere: A heartfelt card might make the best gift of all.

Source

Beauty Gifts For The Newly Engaged

BellaSugar — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:00:11 -0700

If you know anyone who's newly engaged, it's a pretty safe bet that her life has become a whirlwind of planning, preparing, and of course, stressing. And I'm willing to bet the bride-to-be in question has quit paying attention to herself in the process. So why not get the future bride something to encourage some much-needed pampering? Check out this slide show for some great gift ideas, and to see all of our wedding coverage, check out IDoSugar.com!

View Slideshow ›

Engagement Gifts For Lil Ladies

LilSugar — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 15:00:00 -0700

When you propose to a mother, her kids are part of the package. So some grooms include the bride-to-be's daughter in the engagement by also gifting her a keepsake token of his affection. The gesture not only makes the children part of the wedding planning process, but is the first step in blending a family. Check out these sweet finds, that won't set you back as much as mommy's ring, but have that perfect amount of sparkle.

View Slideshow ›

The Office, "The Lover": Best Lines of the Night

BuzzSugar — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 05:30:00 -0700

Yay! Jim and Pam return from their romantic honeymoon, but there is no rest for the newlyweds at The Office. Michael crosses the line - and Pam bears the brunt of his antics, like usual - while Jim fends off a nosy Dwight. I'll admit that Pam got on my nerves this week but I was glad to have Jim back so he could one-up Dwight.

I found this week to be much more engaging than last week's post-wedding episode, and I'm pretty excited to see where the storyline is headed now that the co-workers are all together again. But before I give away any spoilers, check out my favorite quips plus a few more thoughts when you read more.

Meredith: "What'd you bring us?"
Pam: "Some candy."
Meredith: "What else?"
Pam: "That's it."
Meredith: "Ohhhh, because you spent so much on the wedding."
Poor Pam and Jim. They walk into Dunder Mifflin bearing gifts with the honeymoon glow still on their faces - until they realize they're back to working with goons again. I love the bit between Pam and Erin over the candy distribution. (Erin's such a goody-goody that she has to clear everything with Michael.) But my favorite is definitely the rum with the stuffed parrot. Mainly because watching Steve Carell talk next to a stuffed parrot holding a bottle is kind of hilarious.

Michael: "You know what? I'm going to start dating her even harder."
Pam: "What's that supposed to mean?"
Michael: "You know what that means."
So yes, Michael is dating Pam's mom, which he reveals after she gets wind of his fancy dinner reservations. I agree with Pam's initial anger - no one wants their mother to date Michael Scott, especially when he keeps using the word "lover." (Though "pickle" may be worse). However, I'm giddy over this new development, because I can't wait to see what it spawns. Pam and Jim on a date with Michael and Pam's mom? That would be a-ma-zing.

"You know, I really would've appreciated a heads up that you were into dating mothers. I would've introduced you to mine."-Dwight
Just picture Dwight's mother in your mind for a second. That's funny in itself.

"I have plenty of female friends...My aunt, but she just blocked me from IM; the woman from Quiznos."-Michael
Poor guy. I'm curious to see how Michael's new romance ends up affecting his relationship with Pam. She's got to forgive him at some point, but do you think she's overreacting? Personally, I find her complaining kind of grating. She has every right to be P.O.'d, but as the episode went on, she seems angry more out of spite than anything else.

"Did you really think I would put my primary listening device in a wooden mallard? I'm not insane."-Dwight
The mallard! I always enjoy a good Jim versus Dwight scuffle, so this was one of the highlights for me, especially when Jim tries to throw Dwight off by playing opera music or giving the wooden duck to Kelly. Then just when you think Dwight is a total idiot, he pulls out a twist, having hid a pen recorder amongst Jim's office supplies. Jim may have won the promotion, but Dwight's out to win the war.

So what'd you think about the episode? Are you on Team Pam, or were you a little annoyed by her screaming fit like I was? Weigh in below in the comments, and tell me your favorite lines of the evening!

Oh, and don't forget that you can discuss the episode in full over at The Office! group in the BuzzSugar Community! Here's a topic to get you started: Ryan's fedora. Discuss.

Photo and videos courtesy of NBC

Register For Your Wedding the Healthy Way

FitSugar — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 10:15:00 -0700

It's never too early to get in shape for your wedding, but you also can't be blamed for thinking about the wedding gifts right off the bat. You can go the traditional route and register for home and kitchen items, or you can mix it up with some fitness-related finds, from tandem bikes to gym memberships.

I was actually surprised to find a number of online retailers that let you register for fitness-related gifts. Even if you're already married or not getting hitched anytime soon, these make great gift ideas for any fit newlyweds on your list. To see what I've come up with, read more.

Yoga and Pilates Gear: Alternative online retailer Gaiam has a gift registry where you can choose from yoga gear and DVDs, as well as Pilates accessories and exercise balls.
At-Home Fitness Equipment: Through Amazon's wedding registry, you can register for items like treadmills, dumbbells, and other gym equipment for your new love nest.
Outdoorsy Options: Hiking and camping enthusiasts should check out the gift registry at REI, where you can shop for everything from climbing and cycling gear to tandem kayaks.

Did any of you register for fitness-related wedding gifts? If so I'd love to hear your stories. To see all of our wedding coverage, check out IDoSugar.com.

Source

Would You Say Yes to a Cupcake Proposal?

partysugar — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 12:50:48 -0700

I was browsing the YumSugar Community - brides to be: did you know there is an entire group devoted to Wedding Talk? - when I stumbled across these adorable cupcakes. Reader and foodie Kbussanich says that her boyfriend surprised her with the proposal and cupcakes!

The cakes were created by the Flour & Sun Bakery in Pleasantville, NY, and were a mix of chocolate and vanilla cake with vanilla icing that was dyed bright blue. When she heard Kbussanich's answer was yes, the bakery's owner sent over an engagement gift of seasonal (pumpkin and apple with cream cheese frosting) cupcakes. While I'm not a fan of public proposals, the idea of cupcakes at home is incredibly sweet. What do you think? Would you say yes to a cupcake proposal?

Got something you want to share? Participate in the YumSugar Community and you may just be featured here!

Book Bag: Why Women Have Sex

TresSugar — Thu, 10 Sep 2009 08:00:00 -0700

The authors of Why Women Have Sex interviewed 1,000 women with the hopes of uncovering hidden female sexual motivations. Their conclusion? That women sometimes have sex for reasons other than desire and might not be that interested in sex itself.

Some of the women interviewed said they have sex with their partners for the following reasons:

To defend against male infidelity.
To boost their self-confidence.
To barter for gifts or household chores.
To cure a migraine headache.

I'm not so surprised that women have sex for various reasons (don't men, too?), but let's not forget that many women actually enjoy sex and don't just engage in it to get something out of a man. I know women who have sex (gasp!) because they want a good-old fashioned orgasm (as elusive as that orgasm might be!).

The book is out Sept. 29. Would you pick it up?

Hump Day: Is My Boyfriend a Sex Addict?

TresSugar — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 09:00:00 -0700

Welcome to Hump Day, TrèsSugar's new sex advice column! Are you confused about sex? Do you have trouble having an orgasm? Is there something you'd like to try but you're worried it's too weird? Send your questions to TrèsSugar, and our friend Dr. Charlie Glickman from Good Vibrations will offer his sound advice!

Today's Question:

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for six months, and I’ve started feeling funny about the quality of our sex. At the beginning, sex was fantastic between us. We both have high sex drives, are creative in bed, and I think we both felt that we’d found our sexual soul mate.

Lately though, I’m feeling more and more objectified by him. He texts overly sexual things to me. (That’s fine, but how about an “I miss you!” every once in a while!) He wants to do rougher things, and although I don’t mind that and even find it a turn on, I'm beginning to feel less like a partner to him and more like an object. I know he’s really into porn, he masturbates a lot, has had lots of casual flings in the past and I’m beginning to wonder if he’s a sex addict.

What are the signs? What should I do? I care about him, but I am feeling suspicious that he no longer sees me as an equal, and I wonder if, with his insatiable appetite, he might even cheat on me. I know he’s done it in the past. Help! To hear what Dr. Glickman has to say, read more.

Dr. Glickman's Answer:

First thing - good for you for listening to your intuition and your feelings on this. A lot of people ignore or don’t listen to those early warning signs, and that often leads to a worse situation. It’s important to pay attention to them when they first show up and I’m glad you did.

I hear the term “sex addict” used a lot. To be honest, there isn’t any consensus among therapists or sexologists about what it means and there is still a lot of debate about whether someone can be addicted to sex in the way that someone can be addicted to drugs, with all of the physiological effects that can have. At the same time, it seems pretty clear to me that some people have sexual compulsions that they have difficulty controlling or working with.

Now, maybe most people outside the sexology or therapy worlds don’t really care about the difference between sex addiction and compulsion. But I think it’s important to not throw the “addict” label at people (not that I’m suggesting that you’re doing that) because it can be really triggering. In my experience, it tends to create a lot of shame and judgment on top of whatever difficult feelings someone may have because of their actions. Of course, if someone wants to use the word to describe themselves, that’s fine. It’s about self-definition, after all.

Leaving aside the question of whether your boyfriend is a sex addict, I think that the place to start is the fact that you’re not getting what you want. From what you say, it sounds like you enjoy some of the same things, which can be helpful. But if you want sweetness and loving moments mixed in with the rough and tumble, that’s a totally fine thing to ask for. Have you spoken with him about that? If so, has he been open to hearing that? And what have the two of you agreed to do? If you haven’t raised this topic with him, why is that? What could make it easier for you to talk with him about it?

Along those lines, what about the non-sexual parts of your relationship? Are you getting your needs and desires met? Does this pattern extend into those realms, too? If he’s open to talking with you and finding ways to support your relationship, great! That’s a good starting point for working through how things are for your sexual connection. But if he’s not open to that in other arenas, that’s probably a good reason to reconsider whether being “sexual soul mates” is enough of a foundation for a relationship.

Assuming that you two are both willing to work on this together, there are a few directions that you could take things.

One of the challenges that can arise when someone explores some of their sexual desires is that it can cause a disconnection from their partner, especially if they go through a phase of wanting to focus on a particular set of fantasies to the exclusion of other ways of being sexual. I’ve seen people fall into those patterns when exploring many different sexual practices, although it seems to be especially likely when rougher sex is on the menu. I’m not aware of any research on the topic, but my sense is that for some people, the heightened intensity of the interaction can make it easy to get lost in the fantasy and hard to stay present and focused on the real life person they’re with. So finding ways to connect in other ways, such as sweet text messages or more romantic sex can be a big help.

You might want to take a vacation from the rougher sex for a while, at least until you can reconnect in other ways. Being able to ask for the types of connection that work for you can be a big help. I like the book The Five Love Languages for that. The author describes five basic ways of giving and receiving love and care (words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch). He also talks about how we tend to have our preferred method and that we often get into conflict because we’re using different languages, not because we don’t care for our partners. It’s a good read, although I personally don’t care for his biblical approach and had to filter that out. You can get the basic idea on this page of his website without getting into his particular religious perspective, if that works better for you.

It could also be worth talking with your boyfriend about why he wants to have rough sex. For that matter, you might also get a lot out of exploring what your motivations are, too. There are many different reasons people enjoy any type of sex and having a clear understanding of what yours and his are could be really helpful for both of you. If you’re clear about what you want to get out of it, you’ll be much more likely to be able to create the connection that you desire. If you go that route, I strongly suggest not having that conversation during or after sex. Set some time aside for it when you’re both feeling relaxed and ready.

Finally, if none of that works for you and things don’t change, or if he’s not open to talking about it, that may be a sign that things really aren’t going to change. Take a good look at the situation and listen to your feelings. (It sounds like you’ve already been doing that.) I think that whether your boyfriend is a sex addict is less important than whether he’s able and willing to sit down with you and talk about your relationship, and whether the two of you are able to engage in the give-and-take that all successful relationships need.

(Remember, if you have questions for Dr. Glickman, send them to TrèsSugar and we'll pass them along!)

Tips For the Perfect Engagement Party

partysugar — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 07:50:52 -0700

If you were recently engaged: congratulations! While the weeks after he proposed can be overwhelming, they are also very exciting. First things first: you'll want to properly announce the engagement. One way to do so is by hosting an engagement party. To find out my tips for planning the perfect engagement party, read more.

Host the party soon after you are engaged. The engagement party should always take place before the save the date cards are sent.
Select your guests wisely. Everyone who attends will expect to be invited to the wedding. However, there are circumstances - if your big day is a small destination event - where you may want to host a party for those who won't be attending the wedding.
Be creative! The party should reflect you and your fiancé's style. It can be anything from a private dinner at your favorite restaurant to a backyard barbecue to a salsa dance class followed by a buffet.
Traditionally, the engagement party is hosted by the bride's parents, but it's 2009, and really anyone, from the bride's best friend to the groom's brother, can throw your engagement party.
Whoever ends up hosting the party, thank them afterward with a nice note, tickets to a show or sporting event, or a cool coffee table book.
You don't want to upstage the wedding, so choose a theme and style that is different from the one you envision for the big day.
After a round of toasts, don't forget to thank your friends and family for joining you.
Promote mingling: an engagement party is a time for the two families to come together and get to know each other.
Gifts are not customary at an engagement, but some people may choose to bring them, so set up your registry.

What was your engagement party like? Please share your stories below!

Source

How-To: Register For Your Wedding

CasaSugar — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 07:00:15 -0700

Planning your wedding can be stressful, but the fun part is registering for gifts! Unfortunately, some people get carried away at the thought of all the presents coming their way and register spontaneously, not methodically. You have to remember that you're going to live with these gifts, and your friends and family are spending real money on them, so you better like them! Beyond that, you should think about what you need, not what you want, so you can really "set up house" - that's kind of the point. I have a few tips that will make it all easy for you. To hear them, read more.

Consider your timeline. If you're having any sort of engagement party, try to register by the time the invitations for that party go out, making sure you've covered all the price points. Many of your friends and family will want to buy your engagement and wedding gifts as soon as they hear about the engagement and get it out of the way. Don't feel rushed; you can always go back and add more items later on. If you're not having an engagement party, about nine months before your wedding day is a good time to register; it doesn't make you seem as if you're either rushing or procrastinating.
Do your Spring cleaning, and take note of what you already have and what you need for your home.
Then, get together and make a list of things you both want for your home.
Before you start checking boxes, cruise around to a bunch of stores and decide which one or which few suit your tastes the most. Stick to three stores or fewer to keep things uncomplicated, and make sure one of them is a national department store like Bloomingdale's or Macy's.
Most major stores have some sort of registry system, if not an online one. However, if you love a certain boutique or specialty store, they may not. But most will be more than willing to work something out with you, so just ask!
Go through all the questions. Figure out what kind of return policy each store has, how shipping works, whether they take phone orders, whether they have an online database to track orders, etc. Your older generation of friends and family may only want to shop by phone or in store, so there should be something available for them. And it's ideal to be able to track the orders as they come in, so you can add more items at different price points, or remove items if need be.
Use our downloadable registry guide to make sure you've covered all the bases for your housewares, and go ahead and register with each store, giving as much detail as possible to make it easy on guests. Choose size, color, brand, etc.
You can also use MyRegistry to register online from a variety of sources, giving your friends and family a central place to shop for you.
OK, so let's say you already have all the table runners and Le Creuset pans you could ever want. What then? Nowadays it's not uncommon to have an alternative registry. If you'd like, you can register with a charity or even to pay for your honeymoon. Although it's not the most proper of moves, if you really need help with your finances, you can even register for stocks or cash for big ticket items you may need.
Once you're registered, there's some etiquette you should follow for getting the word out. It's a bit taboo to send your registry information out with your invitation. If you have a website for your wedding, you can post it discreetly there. It's also common to have your maid of honor send out the details with the invitations for your bridal shower, and the same for the bachelor party. You can ask your family members to pass the word along to the guests as well. And, if your guests ask you up front where you are registered, go ahead! If you are sending out a package to your guests with other details about the wedding (maps, hotel information, etc.) apart from the invitation, you can slip in a printed card with the registry information.
Most registries remain active for at least a year after the big day so guests can make purchases after the fact. And many stores will give you a discount on the items that weren't purchased, so that you can buy them for yourself.

Source