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Me and Orson Welles: A Likeable Film For Theater-Lovers

BuzzSugar — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 12:00:33 -0800

Zac Efron can act, people! Okay, so he's not going to win an Oscar for his performance in Me and Orson Welles, but he does take a step away from the tween territory of High School Musical and 17 Again to prove that he can hold his own among more experienced performers.

Efron stars as the "Me" in Me and Orson Welles, an over confident aspiring young actor named Richard whose only prior work includes a couple of high school productions - until he lucks into a bit part in Welles's stage production of Julius Caesar. Richard has a romanticized view of theater, but once he enters Welles's company, he's forced to learn the real nature of what goes on behind the scenes.

For more on the film, read more.

Ready to burst his bubble is his new mentor, Orson Welles (Christian McKay). A philanderer and liar with an inflated ego, Welles takes Richard under his wing but knocks him down at the same time. Throw into the mix Welles's tenacious assistant Sonja (Claire Danes) who makes goo-goo eyes at the young guy, and it's clear that Richard is in way over his head (even though he seems clueless about it).

British actor Christian McKay as Welles is larger than life - he plays the role as if the director is always acting and putting on a show, even in his personal moments. Welles could be an unlikeable character, but McKay makes him a guy you love to hate. Even though Efron is the more recognizable face and handles his role well, McKay's performance is the one most critics will talk about.

The film is enjoyable, but it fails to pull you in. My biggest concern is that it won't find an audience. Older viewers might appreciate Welles and the music of the era, but the appeal of Efron might be lost on them. On the other hand, Efron's fans might find the Welles element to be a snooze. Honestly, it's probably best suited to those who have a passion for theater. I enjoyed watching rehearsals with the Caesar cast (which features a ragtag mix of faces, including Ben Chaplin and James Tupper). The office politics and mini-breakdowns that take place before the curtain goes up make the film fun.

My advice? If you do choose to see it on the big screen, catch it quickly before it goes to rental.

If you'd like to review a movie you've seen recently, check out the Movie Reviews Group in community. I may even feature your critique on the site!

Ask a Wife: How Do I Stop Being the Other Woman?

TresSugar — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 08:00:58 -0800

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. This week, a woman in a happy marriage tries to help out a woman stuck in an affair. If you have a question you'd like answered on Conventional Wisdom, you can submit it here.

Today's Question:

I am involved with a married man and I don't know how to stop. He's been married for a couple of years, and his wife often goes out of town. I feel like I'm in a relationship with him: he calls or texts before he goes to sleep, cooks me dinner when he can, and we talk about almost anything with each other. I don't expect him to leave his wife for me, and it doesn't seem like he's going to. He just says he wishes we would have met before he got married. I know deep down that this is so wrong, but I feel like I can't do anything about it. I feel too happy when I'm around him. Help!

Signed,
The Other Woman

To see the advice, read more.

Dear The Other Woman,

I have some bad news and some good news. First, the bad news: you are not happy. You are in a relationship that is damaging to both you and this man's wife. The only person remotely benefiting from the situation is this unfaithful person you are involved with.

Now the good news: real happiness does exist. You can find someone - who's not married - to talk, laugh, cry, and have sex with. And it will be so much better. But first you need to do some work on yourself. Look at your life and decide what type of person you want to be. Do you want the adjectives selfish, dishonest, and disrespectful to describe who you are? Or would you rather have the words loving, faithful, and complete describe your behavior and your relationship? Next you need to boost your confidence. Think about what has made you do something that is undoubtedly so hurtful to yourself and this other woman. Is it because you are afraid of being alone? Is it because you think this is the best thing you can get? If so, let me tell you that a little patience can go a long way. Focus on the things you really enjoy in life (do you like running? painting? traveling?), the things that make you excited, and you will only become more desirable.

The search for love is a hard and frustrating one, but you are just going down a dark and depressing path with nothing but hurt waiting at the end of it. End things with this unavailable man, figure out why you love yourself, and then you will find someone who loves you for all those qualities too.

Signed,
A Wife

Are You Facebook Friends With Your Exes?

GeekSugar — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 15:44:00 -0800

An essay in this week's New York Times hit close to home. The author, mourning the breakup of a long-term relationship, used Facebook to keep up with what his ex was doing. I've covered this topic before in Tech Dating 101 posts; from using Facebook to get to know a potential date to how and when to change your relationship status. I've even offered my advice for how to cut an ex out of your digital life. He was pretty distraught over the breakup, but still couldn't resist the occasional peek at her page:

"Every once in a while, when I was feeling particularly pathetic, I would log on to her Facebook page and listlessly click through the photos of a life that was, somewhat disappointingly, continuing without me."

While I still feel it's best to avoid an ex on Facebook, especially after a tough breakup, actually pulling the trigger to delete an ex from your list of friends is tough.

How Do I Handle This Strip Club Situation?

Tres Community — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 06:00:15 -0800

This post comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

First of all my husband and I have been married for half of a year now. He's in the Navy and just got deployed, but right before the deployment he was sent to Hawaii for one day. I dropped him off at the airport and it was so hard for me to let him go. He called from Hawaii and we talked for five minutes then he said he had to go and he would call back.

As I was checking our bank account to check on the bills I noticed he had paid to go in to some type of club. While crying my eyes out because of how much I already missed him and knowing he wasn't coming home any time soon, I waited for him to call back. When he finally did I got him to tell me the truth and it turned out to be a strip club. This was his first time going into a strip club. The problem is that I feel so offended and disrespected. I know I'm not unattractive, and I'm very open minded in our sex life. So to me it seems as if I'm not enough for him, and that he didn't care about how I feel about strip clubs. The fact that he was lusting over those girls makes me so angry and upset.

To see the rest, .

When we talked I was so mad and disappointed and couldn't stop crying. But after a while I realized that I've been told not to say anything negative or upsetting to him since he was going on deployment to a very stressful environment. I won't be able to talk to him at all while he's gone, I can only send emails but I can't confront him there either. So I had to pretend that I got over it and that I was OK, so he wouldn't feel bad and guilty. But in reality I feel so disgusted and can't take the thought of him wanting someone else. I'm alone and don't have any family here, this is our first deployment and I'm still trying to handle it. He made things so much worse for me, now I'm not just worried about his safety, but also at the thought of when he goes to a port he's going to cheat on me. I'm just hurt and feel resentment towards him, but for as long as he's out I have to pretend I'm fine and support him through the emails. I know some people might think I'm over reacting, but to me this is just like cheating.

There's lots of great stuff going on in our community - join it, check it out, share your posts or advice in the great groups and maybe we'll feature it here on TrèsSugar!

The How-To Lounge: Picking Yourself Up From Rock Bottom

DearSugar — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

This past weekend I asked you all to share a moment in your life when you felt as if you'd hit rock bottom. There were some amazing stories, and it was so inspiring to hear how some of you had made it through all the stronger. But I also feel for those of you in the midst of a low point right now, so I want to take this opportunity to share some of my advice for how to cope with such a difficult time. If this is something you're struggling with right now, check out my tips when you read more.

Perhaps the most difficult part about hitting rock bottom is admitting it. For many people, acknowledging this low point is basically the same as saying they've let their life spin out of control, which can feel very dispiriting. But if you don't admit it, you'll never be able to fight through it.
It's OK to be scared. Once you realize you need to put your life back together, the climb to the top can seem terrifying. Learning to keep trying even when you're scared is half the battle.
Fear can be very defeating, but don't give up. Change doesn't happen overnight, but if you stick with it, eventually you'll get the results you long for.
They call it rock bottom because you can only go up from there, so start with baby steps. Create small goals for yourself and as you succeed, make them larger. And of course, whenever you achieve a goal, no matter how small it may seem, take a moment to pat yourself on the back.
Finally, reach out for support from others. Obviously friends and family are a great resource, but if you can't go to them, consider a therapy group or even an online forum. Sometimes just knowing that others understand you makes all the difference in the world.

As impossible as it seems right now, you will make it past this rough patch! For those of you who have, please feel free to provide your best advice in the comments below.

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Ask an MBA Student: Is It OK For My Boyfriend to See His Ex?

TresSugar — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 09:00:44 -0800

Conventional Wisdom is a different kind of advice column. Your questions will be answered by people from all walks of life rather than by advice experts. This week, a guy working on his MBA tries to help out a woman nervous about her boyfriend's ex. If you have a question you'd like answered on Conventional Wisdom, you can submit it here.

Today's Question:
My boyfriend's ex-girlfriend just moved back in town and he wants to hang out with her. She's going to stop by his house this week so they can catch up. They broke up a couple of years ago, but they dated for a few years so this sort of makes me uncomfortable. Can I tell him that I don't want them to be friends? I don't know whether I should be upset or just let it go.

Signed,
Nervous

To read the MBA student's advice, read more.

Dear Nervous,

My advice is to let them hang out and catch up initially. It's natural for friends who haven't seen each other to meet up; there is nothing to worry about. I think it might be a good idea for you to be there, if your boyfriend is OK with that. If this is truly a friend situation, he shouldn't have a problem with you being there, and if the ex-girlfriend is moving back into town then she should want to get to know you. After they catch up, the novelty might go away and they might never see each other again as people change. However, if they continue to hang out and see each other a lot, you can let him know that it makes you uncomfortable. He should respect your wishes and tone it down.

Signed,
An MBA Student

Do Tell: What's the Best Piece of Advice a Parent's Given You?

DearSugar — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Getting unsolicited advice, especially from our parents, can be more frustrating and intrusive than helpful. With more years and life experience under their belts, some of what they say must be true, which is why it’s always good to at least hear them out even if you find their know-it-all sentiment irritating.

My mom always told me to beware of charming men, and to this day I'm not convinced by a charmer until I see his genuine side - I think it's saved me a few heartaches! I’ve shared mine, now what’s yours? Do tell: What’s the best piece of advice you got from your parents?

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Savvy Links: Advice From Glamour's Women of the Year

SavvySugar — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 04:00:50 -0800

Advice from Glamour's Women of the Year: Work hard at your job, but work harder at your life. - Glamour
Could the recession jump-start your health? - Walletpop
ICYMI, Google is making holiday travel more tolerable with free WiFi - GeekSugar
How to establish credit history without losing your shirt. - Get Rich Slowly
Spend less, live more. - Bankrate
How nagging texts can make you healthier and richer. - Slate
Reader shares about her lack of communication with her husband after his layoff - TrèsSugar

6 Ways to Save on Your Everyday Purchases and Afford Something You Really Want

SavvySugar — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 08:30:45 -0800

In this economy, little treats, like my weekly gossip mag and a latte are my no-fail pick-me-ups, even when I can't afford the new handbag I really want. Still, living on a budget doesn't mean splurges have to be totally out-of-the-question. In fact, even finance experts, Ori Schnaps, co-founder and manager of Thrive, and Aaron Patzer, founder of Mint.com, wouldn't recommend not shopping at all.

They advise that going cold turkey can have a negative affect on your finances, and vowing not to splurge can lead to overspending later on in the month. Instead, both financial experts have real-life advice and small spending tips that will help you to spend more wisely day-to-day. Who knows - that splurge-worthy item might just be affordable after all. Read on to get all of their great tips and find out how you can save.

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You Asked: Why Doesn't He Want Me to Come Out With His Friends?

DearSugar — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 06:00:00 -0800

Dear Sugar,

I have been dating my boyfriend for nine months. We have a great relationship and one I don't want to give up on. The issue is this: I always include him with my social outings but he has yet to include me with any of his. I am a social person and he is more of a home-body, but when he does go out with his friends, he never includes me. I want to meld the two worlds together (my friends and his friends), but still maintain a balance of our own personal time with our own friends. I have mentioned all of this to him before and no actions have been taken to include me.

I'm so confused and feel that having this separation is causing me to have trust issues since I only know one of his friends (his roommate). I am not a controlling person, I feel as though I'm a ghost in his world. Do you have any words of advice?
- Left in the Dust Danielle

To see Dear Sugar's answer read more.

Dear Left in the Dust Danielle,

The fact that you only know one of your boyfriend's friends and you've been together almost a year is a big red flag to me. It seems as though he's deliberately trying to keep his personal life separate from his life with you, which leads me to believe that he's hiding something. I'm glad to hear that you've voiced your concern, but what does he say in return? I don't blame you for developing trust issues so I advise you to readdress the subject once again.

Perhaps you could suggest organizing a get together with both sets of your friends so they can all finally meet each other. Or see if he will compromise and bring you out with him every few times he's with his friends. The company you keep says a lot about who you are so I'd get to the bottom of this ASAP. Trust your gut Danielle and listen to your intuition about this guy. Good luck to you.

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