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Top 10 Reasons Men Don't Want Sex: Part Two

DearSugar — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 08:00:00 -0700

I know it can be pretty frustrating and make you feel a little self-conscious when your man just isn't in the mood to get it on, but like I said yesterday, there are definitely some reasons why men don't want to have sex. Here are five more.

Disagreements with one's mate: Who wants to hug, kiss, and roll around under the covers with someone they're upset with? A man, just like a woman, may be so angry with his partner that he doesn't want to be anywhere near them. Or he may withhold sex from his partner as a form or punishment or tactic to get what he wants.
Stress: If your man is stressed about money, home, his sick grandfather, or your kids then you know what's on his mind, and unfortunately, it's not sex.
He masturbates on his own: I don't think there's anything wrong with masturbating while you're in a relationship, but when masturbation takes the place of sex with the person you're dating or married to, problems will no doubt arise.

To hear the last two reasons read more.

Fear of intimacy: Ahh, the buzz words. Well it's true, some guys have a fear of getting close and having sex with someone is the ultimate form of love and expression. You may have to have a little patience (or a lot), and wait until your guy gets to know you better so he can feel comfortable with the idea of being that connected to you.
Difficulties functioning sexually: With all the commercials out there for drugs to help with impotence, it's no secret that men are having physical problems getting aroused. Some men may also have problems orgasming too soon, or too late, or not at all.

Dear's Advice: If any of these reasons sound all too familiar to you, make sure you're openly communicating with your man (in a sensitive and understanding way, of course). In order to get through this, it's important that you're both honest about what you need and how you feel.

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10 Reasons Why Men Don't Want Sex: Part One

DearSugar — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 08:00:00 -0700

In the beginning of a new relationship, it's hard to keep your hands off each other. Sharing all that fiery passion is what makes it so exciting, but as you get to know each other and become more comfortable, the frequency of sex usually cools down, and sometimes, your sex life can hit a complete drought. So if your man is the one who's "not in the mood," here are the top five reasons why, according to WebMD:

Medications: If your man is taking prescriptions for depression or anxiety, they may be to blame for his nonexistent sex drive.
Lack of sleep: If your man hasn't gotten his fair share of zzz's, then sleep will be the only thing on his mind come bedtime.
Hormonal levels: Testosterone is what drives your man to want to get it on, so if he's lacking in that department, don't count on him wanting to tear your clothes off. Your man can easily figure out if this is the problem by seeing his doctor and getting his hormonal levels checked.

Want to see the other two reasons? Then read more.

Identity issues: Some men have a personal crisis and start to ask important questions like, "What am I doing with my life?" This can happen if they're unhappy with their job or have recently gotten laid off. They could also have issues with their identity if their strong beliefs are questioned or if a close friend or loved one passes away. These kind of issues will understandably put sex on the back burner.
Turn-off to aspects of the sex: If your man has a hard time pleasing you or you take a long time to orgasm, he may have confidence issues or feel like sex is too much work. If he doesn't find sex fulfilling, or if he's not turned on by his partner, instead of talking about it, he may think it's easier to just not have sex at all.

Pretty interesting huh! Stay tuned for Part Two, with five more reasons men don't want to have sex.

Grab Bag! Problems in Your Relationship? Just Do Lunch!

TresSugar — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:00:18 -0800

Lunch dates might be the key to a happy relationship. - Glamour
How long do men think sex should last? - Em & Lo
Today is the 11th annual Transgender Day of Remembrance. - Feministing
Police ticket underage kid for holding a beer in a Facebook picture. - The Awl
Pride and Prejudice would be much better with a 20-page sex scene. - Jezebel
Should posting an inappropriate comment on the Internet get you fired? - GeekSugar
And here are some cats sitting like humans. - Urlesque

Joel McHale and Ken Jeong Share Details About Community!

BuzzSugar — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 07:00:29 -0800

Community is one of those shows where you know the cast has an awesome time together. So I wasn't all that surprised to hear stars Joel McHale (Jeff) and Ken Jeong (Senor Chang) fawn over one another when they recently sat down with reporters. I've been waiting to see these two cement their friendship on-screen too, and it sounds like I'll get my wish tonight. Both actors shared a few tidbits from the episode, plus thoughts on Chevy Chase, the possible Jeff and Annie romance, and their mutual admiration.

Joel on Jeff and Annie's kiss last week: I haven't seen any scripts where it'll be revisited, because I'll probably be arrested, but believe me it was good times. I mean it's Alison Brie from Mad Men!
Joel on Jeff's relationship with Britta: His first initial reaction was, hey there's a really hot chick. And she has like an endless, you know, she has all the denim jackets that you can find. And so I think that was his first reaction. And then at the complete rejection of him he was like, ah, a challenge. And then as he got to know her, she was so much more than he expected, which was she was a totally grounded cool person...So that intrigued him, and she really is I think the moral compass of the show.

To hear more from Joel and Ken, including what's in store for this week's episode, read more.

Ken on Senor Chang's constant power trip: There is something to be said about being in a room where you have students hanging on every word. And it's definitely, as a teacher I think it's an ego rush, you know. You're definitely feeding off of that. It's really the only time in life you get to have a room where people are hanging on your every word and learning from it, and you have a power to influence.
Ken on tonight's episode: You really get to see why Senor Chang has the chip on his shoulder that he does. And some of that involves love and some of that involves friendship, and you really get to see more of the back story of Chang...And it's the relationship with Joel. Joel is really the guy that sees how [Chang's] character comes to be, and why he's developed all these traits along the way.
Joel on working with Chevy Chase: It's like working with Nolan Ryan. He's older than everybody, he's got the best stories. He has worked way more than any of us, but he still throws it harder than any of us...We have a lot to learn from that guy and it's so weird to be walking around with this kind of icon and legend that, you know, you grew up with.
Joel on Ken: Ken he will invent comedy where there is not comedy. He creates it...He's a damn good performer and you pray to God you get him in your movie or your TV show because it's like having a secret weapon.
Ken on Joel: I'm amazed at how Joel handles everything. He's always just grace under pressure this guy, because we'll be working, you know, on a Wednesday or middle of the week, and then he's got to do the Soup or another show and it's just how he switches gears is effortless. I just marvel at that. I'm like dude, how do you do it?
Ken on Community hitting its stride: I think that my wife has a good theory about sitcoms...They're like fine wine, you give them a little bit of time, and they just keep tasting better and better......The audience gets more familiar with the characters, the writers get more familiar characters, and so do the actors.

Do you like the theory that comedies get better with time? I think Community has gradually improved week after week, don't you agree? (Don't forget to watch tonight!)

Do Tell: What Does Commitment Look Like?

DearSugar — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 07:00:00 -0700

Yesterday Reuters reported on a study, showing that men and women can tell whether a member of the opposite sex is interested in long-term commitment or a fling simply by looking at them. The article notes:

Women found men with softer features more likely to opt for commitment . . . the research also showed that women who were open to short-term sexual relationships were usually seen as more attractive.

It seems that this perception is based on human instincts and the desire to mate; however, it got me wondering why people continually fall for someone who's not interested in the same level of commitment. If we can tell what a man wants just by looking at him, then how come so many of us keep going for the ones that are all wrong for us? Then again, do you really think you can see a guy across the room and, without even talking to him, know what kind of relationship he's looking for? Weigh in and tell me what you think!

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Relationship Protocol: Nagging

DearSugar — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 13:00:00 -0700

I’ve always disliked the term nagging, I guess because it seems to imply something that only women do to men - just think of any sitcom that revolves around a family. It wasn't until the other day at a friend's house that I realized that's not always the case. I witnessed a simple request from my friend to her husband turn into a repeated demand. It was extremely frustrating to listen to as her plea became more and more urgent each time she asked it.

But clearly, her behavior was brought on by his refusal to meet her request, and thus, he was just as at fault as she was in regards to the nagging. It seems to me that it has nothing to do with women and everything to do with the dynamic in a relationship. But ladies, do you agree? Is nagging a relationship issue or a woman’s problem?

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The Things He Shouldn't Tell You

DearSugar — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Earlier this week, I stumbled upon an article from AskMen.com that lists the things a guy should keep from his girlfriend in order to avoid any potential arguments. Apparently, the motto around there is, some things are just better left unsaid. Since we've had our own discussions about what can be left out in a relationship - past misgivings or number of sexual partners - I thought I'd share the list with you. To see whether or not you concur or completely disagree, just read more.

He should never mention:

Women that he's had random hookups with throughout the years.
The fact that it was only in recent months that he finally moved out of his parents' house officially.
All kinds of trouble that his friends are up to that would both horrify and disgust you.
One girl in particular from his past that he wishes he could have made it work with.
If he's checking out porn on the regular.
He was actually into your friend before he had any interest in you.

I think quite a few of these could actually be flipped in the other direction too, but what do you think? Did they get it right? Are these all the things you'd prefer never to know?

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Sunday Confessional: She Doesn't Want to Date a Virgin

TresSugar — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 08:00:00 -0800

This week's anonymous confession comes from the TrèsSugar Community group Confession Booth. This confessor finds herself worried about dating a vrigin. She explains:

"I am seeing an absolutely amazing guy. He's everything I've hoped for - honest, funny, charming, trustworthy, and insanely handsome. I feel like he's my reward for putting up with the worst examples of men this world has to offer. I feel so lucky and safe. I couldn't be happier! Oh wait . . . actually I could. There's one small issue that I'm afraid could be a huge issue for me. He's a virgin - and he plans to stay that way. I thought it wouldn't be an issue for me; it's nice to know a guy likes me for me and not just for sex! As we get closer I realize it will eventually be an issue for me. I like sex. Sex with someone I care about is awesome. I thought I could live without it, but now I'm not so sure. I feel like "such a dude," but I'm hesitating at the thought of continuing to see him. Am I a terrible person for needing sex in a relationship? Do I continue to date him and risk resenting him later? I don't know what to do or how to feel."

Do you think this is a big deal?

Movie Preview: Amy Adams in Leap Year

BuzzSugar — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 10:30:04 -0800

You can rarely accuse a romantic comedy of being original, and the set up for Leap Year is no different. Amy Adams stars as Anna, a woman who's waiting for her boyfriend (Adam Scott) to propose when she learns that according to Irish tradition, women are "allowed" to propose to men on February 29, leap day. She chases him to Dublin and when she's diverted to Wales, meets a handsome stranger (Matthew Goode) who makes her rethink her scheme and relationship. Stop groaning.

I know the movie sounds cliche and sexist, yet I can't dismiss anything with Adams in it - her charm is just too powerful! Seriously, though, amid the mildly offensive plot details and too-familiar setting (how many times have we seen that stuck-in-the-road-while-cows-cross scene?), Adams still shines along with her freakishly dreamy foil, Matthew Goode. Take a look at the trailer to see for yourself, and watch out for a small bit from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia's Kaitlin Olson, when you read more.

Leap Year comes out January 8, 2010.

Are You Into Funny Guys?

DearSugar — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 09:00:00 -0700

I love a guy with a sense of humor, and it turns out I'm not the only one that falls for the jokester. A recent study conducted by psychologist Kristofor McCarty found that funny guys get the girls because humor makes men seem "more intelligent, trustworthy - and a better bet for a relationship." Of course hilarity makes everything else more fun, but tell me, is a funny guy a must for you, too?

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