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Awkward! My Married Friends Have No Boundaries

TresSugar — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 07:00:00 -0700

My friend just vented to me about her married friends who like to divulge details about their sex lives without realizing that they're sharing way too much! (Sound familiar?) Here she described her dilemma:

"My good friend just sent me an email telling me that she and her husband are 'trying' for baby number two. She went on to tell me that they've been 'working on it' for a month now, and she assured me that she will keep me updated. Why do all my married friends think that it's suddenly not awkward to talk about their sex lives when there's baby-making involved! Not OK!"

Do you have any advice for my grossed-out friend? Do you think she's overreaching, or is she justified to feel like this is TMI? (And if you have some awkward tales of your own, join our Awkward! group to share etiquette questions and stories with other readers.)

Would You Bring a Girlfriend to a Wedding?

TresSugar — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 09:00:00 -0700

One of my single girlfriends, let's call her Francesca, is in a bind. Francesca was invited, with a guest, to a wedding that is happening this weekend. The bride allowed for a plus one because she knew there wouldn't be too many single guys at the wedding.

Francesca RSVP'd saying she would bring a guest, figuring she would invite either a love interest or a guy friend. Since then, she has dated two different guys, but things didn't work out with either of them. Francesca has gone through her pool of guy friends, but no one is available! She's thinking of bringing a girlfriend. Would you do that?

And, by the way: don't forget to check out our All the Single Ladies group if you want to chat more about the single life!

Study Says: Single Women More Likely to Pursue Taken Men

TresSugar — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 11:00:00 -0700

As if single women were not stigmatized enough, researchers at Oklahoma State University, likening single women to certain species of "mate-poaching" birds and fish, claim that a study they conducted reveals that single women are more likely to pursue men who are taken than single.

Melissa Burkley, who conducted the study with her colleague Jessica Parker, told 184 heterosexual university student participants they would be involved in a study on sexual attraction. The volunteers (equal numbers men and women, half attached and half single), were told that a computer program would match them with an ideal partner.

The same photograph of Mr. Right and Ms. Right were presented to the respective groups. Half of them were told these ideal mates were single, the other half were told they were in romantic relationships. The results? When told Mr. Right was single, 59 percent of the single women were interested in pursuing a relationship, but a whopping 90 percent were interested when told he was attached. Men didn't seem to care either way, and the attached women in the groups seemed to slightly favor single men. To hear what the researchers had to say about the results, read more.

So what do researchers Burkley and Parker make of the results? They hypothesize that single women might be more drawn to attached men because they've been "prescreened' by other women.

Perhaps I don't know enough about research methods, but how does this speculation arise from the results? Also, although these researchers asked participants whether they'd actually pursue a relationship rather than merely ask if they found the ideal mates attractive as previous studies had, what does that mean exactly? They might consider it - but I find it hard to believe 90 percent of women would actually go after an attached man. What do you think about this study and whether or not it would actually translate into real-world action?

10 Best Things About Being Single

TresSugar — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 04:00:00 -0700

If you don't know already, it's National Singles Week! Earlier I asked you all what's the best thing about being single? I've rounded up some of your thoughts, and added in a few others, to come up with the 10 best things about being single. Warning! If you're in a relationship, this slideshow might make you miss being single! Join the Single Ladies group on TresSugar to meet other single galls, share stories and swap advice.

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Say What? It's All About Drew

TresSugar — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 15:00:00 -0700

"Sexual love is secondary to me right now. I've spent a lot of time in my life dedicating myself to love or the pursuit of love or the understanding of love. But for the last few years, my life just hasn't been about that for me. It's just not about the mother baggage. It's not about the boy. It's about something completely different, and it's very refreshing. I'm trying to understand it and relish it."

- Actress Drew Barrymore tells Parade magazine why she is in no rush to find a mate. Having time to focus on yourself is definitely a major perk of being single!

Do Tell: What's the Best Part of Being Single?

TresSugar — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 07:00:00 -0700

It's National Singles Week! Each year, the third week of September is carved out to recognize "singles and their contributions to society."

If you're single, you might think it's patronizing to have a week set aside to remind everyone that people of your same relationship status contribute to society. Is a reminder really necessary? But since now is the official time to celebrate being single, tell me: what's the best part of not having a significant other?

Also! In honor of all you fabulous single women, we've created a new group on the TrèsSugar Community. Join All the Single Ladies to keep the conversation going!

Awkward! He Hit on Her in Front of His Girlfriend!

TresSugar — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 03:00:00 -0700

A couple of weekends ago, I went out to a bar with one of my girlfriends who was visiting from out of town. (Let's call her Linda.) We met up with a group of friends and Linda started chatting and flirting with a guy who was part of our extended group. They hit it off, so Linda gave him her number because he said he would be visiting her city the next weekend.

Later in the evening, Linda was introduced to the guy's girlfriend! Feeling embarrassed, she convinced herself that he was just being friendly. By the next day she had totally forgotten about it . . . until he ended up sending her a suggestive text message when he came into town. This guy was a real keeper: trying to make plans via text when he already had a girlfriend! How does one handle such douchiness?

Single Ladies: Happies vs. Crappies

TresSugar — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 11:00:00 -0700

There's nothing wrong with being single, so why not embrace it? Just be careful about how you embrace it, argues Wendy Atterberry in a column titled Do Some Single Women Need to Shut Up?

After reading Lea Lane's inspired Huffington Post piece entitled Why I'm Alone, Atterberry applauds a single woman who relishes her independence. A widow and the founder of SoloLady.com, Lane says that she's not aggressively pursuing a mate because she likes being able to call her own shots and she appreciates solitude but also because "life doesn't always wind up the way you expect it to, and you roll with it."

Lane is what Atterberry dubs a "happy" - a woman who is happy being alone but not militantly antirelationship. On the flip side are the "crappies," women who are off-putting in their lack of compromise and self-righteous singlehood. Let's discuss this, shall we?

Dear Poll: Do You Consider Yourself Single Until You're Married?

DearSugar — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 06:00:00 -0700

Yesterday geek and I launched a new feature called Tech Dating 101 which is aimed at answering all your dating questions in relation to this new age of technology we're living in. Our first question tackled dating status on online profiles, and Hiding55 brought up a great point when people suggested to keep your status as "single" until you're married to avoid confusion. She said that she doesn't consider herself "single" when she's in a relationship, and I completely agree. I know not everyone has the same definition of single, so tell me, do you consider yourself "single" until you have a ring on your finger?

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Group Therapy: Can I Still Find Love?

Wed, 11 Mar 2009 04:00:00 -0700

My boyfriend of three years recently broke up with me. We lived together and even talked about getting married, but one day he just came home and said he didn't love me anymore and that I wasn't enough for him. As devastated as I was, I actually feel it was for the best.

The problem is that I fear he was my only chance at love. I'm in my late 20s, in business school, and I'm the only single one left in my group of friends. Do girls like me get a second chance? It just seems hard to believe that I could find another man who would love me for who I am without coming to the conclusion that he could do better. Are there men out there looking for a nerdy girl who is not gorgeous, but who is a good person?

[EDITOR'S NOTE: To read more GROUP THERAPY, click here or submit your own question here.]
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