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Is it Appropriate to Cancel Plans and Dates Over Text Messaging?

Tech Dating 101: Can I Get Out of a Date Over Text Message?

Welcome back to this week's installment of Tech Dating 101, where geeksugar and DearSugar team up to help you out with the issues that arise when technology and dating meet. Last week we talked about whether it was cool to make big life announcements online, and before that, I gave you advice on changing your Facebook relationship status. This week, it's textual.

Is it OK to decline a date or cancel plans over text messaging?

Basically, it is OK to decline a date or cancel plans, but only if the date was proposed over text messaging. That way, the standard for the date has already been set with the text, making it perfectly fine for you to say you can't make it out.

To see the exceptions to this rule and what to do if you weren't asked out over text, just


Here are the exceptions to this: Even if the date was made or asked over text, if the date is only a few hours away, you should call rather than text, just to make sure they get the message and you don't stand someone up. Sure, they're as likely to see a text as they are your call or voice mail, but reaching out on voice just seems to be the nicer way to cancel at the last minute.

So what if you weren't asked out over text? Is it still OK then to say no or cancel over text? It depends on the situation. Often times, texting is the ultimate cop out and people can see right through it.

If you probably won't see the person again and it's at least the day before, I think it's OK to text that you can't accept or have to cancel the date. However, if you don't text a lot with this person and you do want to see them again at some point, always call.

It's totally tempting to text someone you're not that into that you won't be going out with them, because it's way less awkward — especially if you don't have a great excuse. In that case, when you just want to get out of something at any cost, just evaluate how you'd like to be treated on the other end of it. Do you want to be texted an abrupt cancellation?

To find out how Dear feels about texting and date plans, head over to DearSugar!


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