Don't Feel Sad That These Kickstarters Failed

Pitch: "An ambitious photographic journey to major American landmarks, baring my rear and making a 12-month calendar to show for it."

Reaction: So this is basically just an excuse for us to pay for one dude's travels? No thanks.

Pitch: "Absolutely invisible panties! Use them every day, be sexy and free, even when you're having "special women's" days!"

Reaction: How is this comfortable? Just no.

Pitch: "A rare opportunity to own a copy of a reprint of the highly sought-after board game Ghettopoly. One thousand (limited) copies will be printed."

Reaction: Um, hello, this is incredibly offensive. Should never, ever get made.

Pitch: "Human Elf will be a real, live stranger. When the kids do their house sweep in the morning to see where Elf is hiding, they are going to find a person in an elf suit. I suspect he won't fit on a shelf, so he will sit on our table. He is unable to move, and the kids cannot touch him, or he will lose his magic. Don't worry — the kids have survived more traumatizing situations — who takes a 7-year-old to The Hunger Games?!"

Reaction: Creepiest of the creepy.

Pitch: "It's time to put a ring on it! This is a one-of-a-kind Beyoncé dancing wall clock for any member of Queen B's BeyHive."

Reaction: Hold up, why did this fail? Hopefully some way, somehow, it gets funded.

The pitch: "Add chocolate to a movie quote and have your friends guess what movie it came from. You may find out, 'You can't handle the chocolate.'"

Reaction: Funny, but probably for not the right reasons.

Pitch: "The Redneck Hugy — empowering individuals to stand for freedom in a peaceful open way. Spread the word!"

Reaction: Funny or offensive? You pick.