Pitch: "Human Elf will be a real, live stranger. When the kids do their house sweep in the morning to see where Elf is hiding, they are going to find a person in an elf suit. I suspect he won't fit on a shelf, so he will sit on our table. He is unable to move, and the kids cannot touch him, or he will lose his magic. Don't worry — the kids have survived more traumatizing situations — who takes a 7-year-old to The Hunger Games?!"
Reaction: Creepiest of the creepy.