POPSUGAR Life Balance

Lindsay Lohan Looks Back on “The Parent Trap” 28 Years Later - Including That Oreo Scene

Chandler Plante — Wed, 29 Jul 2026 07:05:03 -0700

28 years ago, "The Parent Trap" remake introduced us to one of the greatest food combinations of all time. From the moment we saw Hallie Parker dunk an OREO into her personal jar of peanut butter, we were sold, taking to the pantry to re-create the treat ourselves. Much like the 1998 film, the sweet and salty pairing has truly withstood the test of time, and for good reason. "That moment in the movie, it's when Halle and Annie really connected. It's when you start to see a sign of what their friendship is going to be," Lindsay Lohan tells Popsugar. "I think a lot of it has to do with friendship and finding someone [who] you think is so different from you, but actually is quite similar."

To her point, for all the film's iconic moments (yes, we're still trying to learn Annie and Martin's handshake), this unexpected food combo is one we just can't seem to shake. Over the years, peanut-butter OREOs have become more than just a unique snack - they're the ultimate symbol of summer nostalgia.

In honor of the film's 28th anniversary, we spoke with Lohan, Amy Sedaris, and Patricia Arquette about how they're bringing the iconic scene full circle with Reese's OREO. Read on for their candid thoughts on the combo, personal favorite food pairings, and dream Camp Walden itineraries.

Popsugar: What are your real thoughts on peanut butter and OREOs?
Lindsay Lohan: When I first tried OREOs and peanut butter, I remember [it] was during "The Parent Trap" and on set, and I was like, "What? Do I really have to eat this?" But I was 11. And then I ended up liking it.

PS: If you had to go to Camp Walden in 2026, what would you most want to do?
Amy Sedaris: I would lay on my back in the field at night and just look at the stars.
Patricia Arquette: I would do a lot of arts and crafts, but also archery. I have my little inner goddess, Diana.
LL: I think I would be doing the fencing. Just because I'd want to be out of the sun, because I'm super concerned about my skin always - [the mask] would block my face.

PS: Are there any other unique food pairings you love that people might not expect?
AS: I do like potato chips in a sandwich sometimes.
LL: I do too, I almost need them when I have a sandwich. It feels like they have to be together.
PA: I put cinnamon in my coffee . . . and turmeric.

PS: Between Nick Parker's vineyard estate in California, and Elizabeth James's London townhouse, which one would you pick?
AS: I would pick London, for sure.
PA: Am I there alone? Yeah, I'll go to London.
LL: It's hard because the vineyard has horses and horseback riding, and it's so beautiful and peaceful, but I love fashion and I love cities. So I think I'd have to go London.

Chandler Plante (she/her) is a staff writer and PS Fit Producer. She has over six years of industry experience, previously working as an editorial assistant for People magazine, a social media manager for Millie magazine, and a contributor for Bustle Digital Group. She has a degree in magazine journalism from Syracuse University and is based in Los Angeles.

Taryn Delanie Smith Is the Ultimate Hype Girl on Re:Play

Kelsey Castañon — Sat, 25 Jul 2026 07:45:00 -0700

If we learned anything from our Feel-Good List cover shoot with Taryn Delanie Smith earlier this year, it's that she's going to make you laugh. Further proof: the model, actor, and viral internet personality recently stopped by Popsugar's new celebrity talk show, Re:Play, where we gabbed about her favorite pop culture memories, played retro games, and, yes, cackled.

Watch as Delanie Smith waxes poetic about "Titanic," Ugg boots, and - ever the girls' girl - her friendship with Tefi Pessoa (host of the most recent "Love Island: Aftersun," who she delightfully called on the spot). Press play above for the full episode.

Kylie Cantrall Brings the Fun and Games to Re:Play

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 08 Jul 2026 07:15:03 -0700

It's not every day a Disney Channel icon breaks into song sitting across from you. Alas, such was the case when Kylie Cantrall stopped by Popsugar HQ to join the latest episode of Re:Play, our new nostalgic talk show. There were previews of new music (she recently announced her new EP "Valley Girl Problems," out July 24), retro games, and lots of throwbacks to 2016 - Cantrall's favorite era, naturally.

Press play on the video above to watch the "Descendants: Wicked Wonderland" star and singer break down her favorite childhood memories, from starting a burgeoning at-home slime business to bumping in to Olivia Rodrigo on set to the lessons she's learned from "Sex and the City," and more.

Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's Love Is Written in Their Aura Colors

Taylor Andrews — Wed, 01 Jul 2026 15:45:05 -0700

From red lips and a white dress to indigo eyes and lavender haze, Taylor Swift is famous for including color references in her music. But according to aura readers, Swift's connection to color may go well beyond her songwriting.

Like an astrological sign or personality type, aura colors are believed to reflect a person's energy and emotional makeup. "Auras are an energy signature around each person; they represent the authentic vibrational waves you naturally give out and help you understand yourself," aura reader Megan Firester, also known as Mystic Michaela, tells Popsugar.

When it comes to Swift, Firester says she sees a blend of deep purple and shimmery, sparkly yellow. (Yes, ironically, very lavender haze.) Ahead, she breaks down what Swift's aura colors reveal about her personality, values, and, dating habits - including her relationship with Travis Kelce. Are the two of them actually end game?

Experts Featured in This Article

Megan Firester, also known as "Mystic Michaela," is an aura reader and author of the book "What's My Aura?"

What Is an Aura?

According to aura experts, auras date back to ancient Egypt, during which time Egyptians believed the colorful glows to be the "life force that sustained the pharaohs and their power." In traditional Chinese medicine, auras are an energy source that's important for maintaining each person's well-being. As Firester says, knowing your aura can help you "live life more authentically in every facet of life - career, relationship to self, money, working out, motivation, relationships, and even your personal style."

To figure out your unique hues, a professional (like Firester) can do an aura reading for you. Or, you can use your phone to try to identify your auras on your own. Firester suggests sitting in front of a white wall and filming yourself while you meditate. "After a few minutes of this, you can watch the video back to see if you spot any colors," she says.

You may need to tap into your third-eye chakra to strengthen your aura-seeing ability, Firester notes. Your third eye is located in the middle of your forehead and is felt on a subconscious, spiritual level - similarly to how it may feel to meditate. You can strengthen your third-eye skills by practicing yoga, meditation, and visualization, Firester adds.

Aura Color Meanings

There are eight aura colors in total - red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet, and pink - and each has a specific vibe. "Learning to lean into and understand the feelings each color emanates can assist with reading your aura as well as the auras of others around you. Even if you don't actually see them," Firester says. According to her, here are some of the key aura color characteristics:

Red: direct and assertive
Orange: focused and energetic
Green: logical and intellectual
Blue: sensitive and empathetic
Yellow: organized and curious
Purple: creative and intuitive
Indigo: introverted and honest
Pink: optimistic and loving

What Is Taylor Swift's Aura?

Swift's aura colors are purple and yellow. "As a yellow aura, she values organization, perfection, and commitment to excellence," Firester says. ("Commitment to excellence" translation = selling out her global Eras Tour.) As for her purple side: "Purple auras are artists by nature and relish in living outside the lines others want to draw around them," Firester says. ("Living outside the lines others want to draw around her" translation = rerecording all of her albums so she owns the rights to them.)

Firester says the fact that Swift's aura is both yellow and purple may present some internal struggles for the star. Namely, she may feel conflicted between her desires for structure and spontaneity.

What Does Taylor Swift's Aura Say About Her Dating Habits?

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Firester took a look at the auras of some of Swift's former BFs, and she noticed a pattern - something she's coining Swift's "aura dating pattern." According to Firester, Swift tends to find "long-term potential" in partners with green auras. For example, her relationships that have seemed to pull her in and resulted in a dynamic artistic shift have all been green-aura partners, such as Joe Jonas, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Joe Alwyn, Firester says.

People with green auras tend to be firm in their beliefs, have an excellent ability to explain their own perspective, think brilliantly, and take the lead in relationships. "Taylor has found comfort in these relationships, thinking they are more stable, permanent, and lasting," Firester says.

After her relationship with someone who had a green aura ends, Swift has historically pursued a partner with purple/blue aura. According to Firester, these purple/blue relationships give Swift space to "find her own voice and find her way back to her own perspective."

"Blue purple men are very comfortable with letting others take the lead. They have an evolving perspective on the world around them and rarely feel the need to stick to one belief system or way of thinking over time," Firester says. "They aren't comfortable being leaders in a relationship; rather, they are supportive of their partner taking their own roads when necessary."

Purple auras in Swift's dating history? Taylor Lautner, Harry Styles, and . . . Travis Kelce.

Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's Compatibility, Based on Their Aura Colors

Firester says Kelce's aura is a combination of purple and blue. "[Purple shows us] he's creative, excited about life, and doesn't fear new thoughts or ideas," she says. The blue tones, meanwhile, indicate that Kelce is emotional and likes to surround himself with the people closest to him, like friends and family.

This primes Kelce to be a great partner for Swift. "Taylor can feel the support and encouragement of Travis to have fun, speak her mind, and give voice to her creative flow without worrying about how it will affect him," Firester says.

But what does the future hold? Forester says with their upcoming nuptials, the two could potentially be end game. "I do get that she feels a bit more attached than she thought she would, and that feels exciting and interesting for them both," Firester says. "The purple auras of Travis and Taylor are having a dynamic and fun time together. I feel like they are learning a lot, feeling safe and excited together as they ride this wave in the public eye, and I do get that they have one another's backs."

Time will only tell what happens for these two, but if it's anything like Swift's previous dating history, we can expect to at least get an epic album from it.

Taylor Andrews (she/her) is the senior balance editor at PS, specializing in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With eight years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Prior to joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.

Popsugar Pulse's "Elle" Cover Is For the Girls

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 01 Jul 2026 06:00:03 -0700

If you think about it, "Legally Blonde" was always a story about friendship. The bending and snapping, the liposuction secret-keeping, the Double Delta Nu Sister Swearing: it was all in step with the movie's overarching theme of girlhood. Of finding your place, your people, and, in turn, yourself.

This is what made the franchise soar, and why, when we learned of a prequel called "Elle" debuting 25 years later on Amazon Prime, we knew we wanted to spotlight the new pink posse at the heart of the series for our latest cover of Popsugar Pulse.

The show itself follows a young Elle Woods from Bel Air to Seattle and carries similar themes of the films, but to me, the connection between its stars Lexi Minetree (as Elle), Chandler Kinney (Kimberly), and Gabrielle Policano (Liz) is what makes it special. During the photoshoot, I learned they are every bit the embodiment of what "Legally Blonde" represents: friends who are different in many ways but who show up and root for each other in all things.

On set, the three giggled between takes, spoke in inside jokes, and filled awkward silences for one another. Outside of set, they stay up until 2 a.m. the night before a big event, sleep on each other's couches, and FaceTime when they need help. "These are girls who will be in my life for the rest of my life," Minetree told senior special projects director Lena Felton.

I can't help but wonder, and to co-opt a phrase from the popular Instagram trend, isn't this the whole point?

In pink we trust,
Kelsey

It Doesn't Get Funnier Than A Twink and a Redhead on Re:Play

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 24 Jun 2026 07:20:01 -0700

You may not know Grant Gibbs and Ashley Gill by name, but you've certainly seen them all over TikTok. They're the viral duo behind A Twink and a Redhead, best known for making everyone in their collective wake laugh through comedy sketches like "Don Cheadle" and "Panera," and our latest guests on Re:Play, Popsugar's nostalgic talk show.

Press play to watch these childhood best friends reminisce on their 6th grade meet cute, the pop culture moments they love to this day, and what you can expect from their musical comedy tour. (Spoiler: it's chaos . . . you can expect chaos.) Be warned - the entire episode is spit-out-your-water funny.

Stephen Colletti Joins Re:Play, Hearts Melt Worldwide

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 10 Jun 2026 07:30:02 -0700

Stephen Colletti has been embedded in pop culture for decades: first, as everybody's favorite heartthrob on MTV's hit reality TV show "Laguna Beach," then as everybody's favorite heartthrob on "One Tree Hill" and, recently, as a faithful heartthrob on "Traitors." Now, he's gracing the small screen in entirely new fashion as the latest guest on Re:Play, Popsugar's nostalgia-soaked talk show.

Colletti stopped by Popsugar's offices to discuss his swoon-worthy tendencies on (and off) the screen, his favorite memories from the early 2000s, the bromance behind his latest Netflix series "Everyone Is Doing Great," and so much more. Press play above to watch.

Meet the First Guest of Re:Play, Ariana Madix

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 27 May 2026 07:10:03 -0700

Ariana Madix makes the word "multihyphenate" sound lazy. She's a reality TV icon ("Love Island USA," "Dancing With the Stars," and, of course, "Vanderpump Rules"); owner and restaurateur of West Hollywood-based sandwich shop, Something About Her; author of Single AF Cocktails: Drinks for Bad B*tches. Finally, and importantly: she's the inaugural guest of Popsugar's new nostalgic-soaked talk show, Re:Play.

From ballroom to Broadway to bombshell, clearly we've got a lot of ground to cover - and this time it is all fun and games. Press play above to uncover Madix's early "Vanderpump Rules" memories, the biggest "Love Island" misconceptions, and why producing her own TV shows may not be a reality too far off. Plus, the advice she'd give to fellow Bravo star and this season's After Sun host Ciara Miller on life after heartbreak.

Introducing Re:Play, the Nostalgic Talk Show You've Been Waiting For

Kelsey Castañon — Tue, 26 May 2026 09:00:03 -0700

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I was destined for a life of ludophilia.

Born in Las Vegas into what you might call a "game night family," every weekend growing up featured a rotating cast of characters all huddled around the living room table playing Cranium, Clue, Scrabble, Scene It?, or Guess Who, to name just a sampling. My mother, a fierce competitor with a penchant for winning but zero hand-eye coordination, extolled the camaraderie and connection that came from her chosen sport. A little friendly competition brings people together, she'd say.

She's not wrong. There's simply no greater nexus for human connection than a good game night with friends, and nothing more nostalgic for me personally. It's why I've dedicated a not-insignificant amount of square footage in my tiny Brooklyn apartment for my own stash of playing cards and trivia, and the reason I couldn't be more excited to combine said niche hobby with my journalist day job as the host of Re:Play, the celebrity interview series you haven't seen yet.

Launching with our first episode on May 27, Re:Play is Popsugar's new nostalgia-soaked talk show where I invite your favorite stars to settle in, play throwback games, and share the stories they've never told anywhere else. In other words: my ideal Friday night.

Season one will be full of surprises, starting with a jam-packed lineup of guests like reality TV icon Ariana Madix, everybody's favorite heartthrob Stephen Colletti (with a surprise appearance from everybody's other favorite heartthrob, stay tuned on that), viral internet personality Taryn Delanie Smith, and so many more. I'll ask them about their own childhood memories, get the scoop on retro trends they're loving today, and go head-to-head on a handful of games - each with a nostalgic, feel-good twist. Some of my favorites include The Crush Draft, a snake-style draft with a rom-com spin, and Full Body Flashback, a five-senses game down memory lane of taste, smells, textures, visuals, and sounds. But that's just the tip of the iceberg.

You can catch it all on YouTube, where we'll drop episodes every other week on Wednesdays. See you there?

To making mom proud,

Kelsey

Angourie Rice on How Connection Fuels Her Creativity

Lena Felton — Fri, 15 May 2026 12:00:03 -0700

It's early in Australia when Angourie Rice appears on Zoom, her long blond hair in beachy waves. She seems bright-eyed and energetic, so I ask if she's a morning person. She laughs and eventually lands on, "Nope." Her sweet spot is waking up at 8:30 or 9, she says, but she's up early because she travels to the UK tomorrow.

It's a bit of a nutty time in general for the multihyphenate - her second book, "My Wonderful Disgrace," hit shelves this week, and her latest feature film, the rom-com "Finding Emily," releases in the UK next week. But in Australia, where she was born and raised, she's able to maintain somewhat of a normal schedule before the craziness really begins.

"I like to wake up, I like to go to the gym, I like to sit down on my computer and read scripts and do meetings," she says of a typical day when she's not on set or traveling for a project. "Usually, I try to make time to see friends and family. I like seeing people in real life every single day. That's mostly what I'm doing."

It sounds like a balanced approach to the life of a celebrity, but I get the sense talking to the 25-year-old that she must be very productive to be able to pull off all that she does, between acting projects (you might recognize her from her role as Betty Brant in "Spider-Man" or as Cady Heron in "Mean Girls: The Musical") and her writing. She admits that when she is on set for a project, her day to day looks more "regimented."

"I do try to be disciplined about taking care of myself throughout the week, because the job can be so tough on the body," she says. In the mornings, she'll give herself 30 minutes to an hour to prepare for the day, sometimes squeezing in a little yoga. She'll meal prep her lunches ahead of time, too, and has a few other tried-and-true tricks that keep her feeling her best.

The first is physical movement - she loves being able to walk to a gym nearby and "have someone tell me what to do." Last year, she says, she fell in love with lifting weights. She appreciates the goal-oriented aspect of this type of fitness: "I love anything practical - anything that feels like, I will be doing this at some point in my real life, like I will be lifting a heavy thing."

For her mental health, she says, it's simple: "I do just feel my best when I'm talking to people I love and who understand me and have known me for a while." That could be her mom or sister or dad or a friend. She says that some of her closest friends are from high school, which she knows can be rare. "Something I really value about those friendships is that I've been close with them since before this all became a huge part of my life," she says, referencing her career. "And I think also when somebody knows you through your really embarrassing 13-year-old stage, you're kind of bonded for life."

In a matter of minutes, it becomes crystal clear that Rice is a people person. She says the way she decompresses best is with loved ones ("I can go like one or two days living on my own, not seeing people I know, talking to the cashier at the grocery store, but after two days, things are happening up in my brain and I need to, like, go and see someone"). And in the middle of our conversation, Rice checks her phone; her mom, Kate Rice, is calling, but she'll return it later on.

It's that ability to connect, that empathy, that perhaps makes her so successful as both an actor and an author. After all, both of her writing projects have been done in collaboration with her mom (their first book, "Stuck Up and Stupid," was a Reese's Book Club pick). And her acting projects hinge on her ability to connect with others in a genuine way. Her latest film, "Finding Emily," is all about a hopeless romantic teaming up with Rice's character, Emily, to find his one true love.

This week and next, she'll be promoting the film with her castmates, and it's in these moments that she abandons her regimented schedule for later nights - risking an empty tank for the magic of togetherness. "I'm definitely more the one to be like, 'Hey, let's go out,'" she says. "I'm like, let's actually sit down and talk away from all the madness and just have a conversation with us."

Given that she likes to be with people, it all makes sense. And although discipline may be what's gotten her here, Rice is also looking forward to a summer - and a year - where she lets go. "This year, one of my ideas for this year was letting go of embarrassment . . . just do what you want to do and if being embarrassed is the worst thing you're going to be, it's actually not that bad," she says, then repeats it one more time like a mantra. "I'm trying to chase adventure and opportunity without the fear of embarrassment."

Lena Felton (she/her) is a senior director of special projects at PS, where she oversees sponsored packages, tentpole projects, and editorial partnerships. Previously, she was an editor at The Washington Post, where she led a team covering issues of gender and identity. She has been working in journalism since 2017, during which time her focus has been feature writing and editing and elevating historically underrepresented voices. Lena has worked for The Atlantic, InStyle, So It Goes, and more.

No More Maxxing: Why I'm "Minusing"

Kristine Thomason — Wed, 06 May 2026 14:40:02 -0700

Looksmaxxing, sleepmaxxing, fibermaxxing, healthmaxxing, longevitymaxxing, cyclemaxxing, even grandmamaxxing. Lately, it seems like every corner of the internet is riddled with people "maxxing", or maximizing, one aspect of life or another.

The concept spread like a disease after manosphere content creator Clavicular popularized the term "looksmaxxing," which refers to the practice of optimizing one's physical appearance by way of skincare, cosmetic surgery, or practices like "mewing." (Worth noting: this content is primarily targeted at young men.) Suddenly, "maxxing" became a ubiquitous suffix across the internet, as creators began sharing how to bring every niche topic to its extreme.

Personally, I'm wary of any concept that's plucked from the depths of toxic masculinity - and this one is no exception. Although so many of these concepts seem wholesome in nature (what could be wrong with getting more fiber in your diet or optimizing your sleep?), even positive sentiments brought to their extreme can be detrimental. It can breed obsession and unhealthy hyperfixation - and, frankly, it all feels a bit too familiar.

I entered the workforce in the millennial "girl boss" era in New York, when hustle culture was at its peak, and running on empty was a badge of honor. Part of this was a side effect of being in my 20s, when I was wildly ambitious and hungry to keep moving up the ladder as quickly as my legs could carry me. I said yes to every new opportunity and responsibility that was thrown my way, never once pausing to think about whether or not I was draining my cup; there was no space for that, I was squeezing out every single drop of effort my body could give. I was maximizing my potential.

During those years, immersed in the wellness world as a journalist, I also watched the health-trend pendulum oscillate between one extreme to the other. Raw veganism was all the rage, and then carnivore diets reigned supreme. We went from dabbing the excess grease off a pizza to mixing butter into coffee. Even bodies had trends - slender bodies were desirable, and then muscular glutes were the "it" look. It seemed like every day, there were new studies flooding my inbox about some seemingly benign food we needed to cut from our diets entirely, and within years we would learn those fears were dramatically overblown.

It was, in a word, exhausting.

As I scroll through social media now, with words like "sleepmaxxing" and "fibermaxxing" littering my feed, I fear it's simply a rebranding of the same toxic cultural patterns we've seen on loop generation after generation. These concepts, like so much of problematic media, prey on our deepest fears and insecurities about not being enough as we are. They imply that if we simply lean in, and optimize these intricacies of our life, then maybe we will be whole and worthy and lovable.

The thing is, chasing extremes rarely gets you where you want to go. From where I'm sitting, as a 30-something millennial still recovering from burnout (thank you, hustle culture), I'm so tired of maximizing. Instead, I'm adopting a new principle: minusing.

Now, before you come at me for introducing even more internet nonsense, allow me to explain. In this era of my life, I've realized that running myself into the ground in the name of self-improvement is not only counterproductive, but also unnecessary. Throughout my 20s, steeped in the wellness world, I began to hyperfixate on maintaining a healthy lifestyle and thriving at work - to the point that the stress of constructing a perfect version of myself actually began to deteriorate my health. In retrospect, I realize the more I dug in and obsessed about maximizing every element of my life, the less mentally and physically healthy I became.

Now, as I'm bombarded with new ways to hyperfixate on my diet or how I look, I'm trying to quiet the noise through some self-reflection. Can I unfollow accounts that aren't benefitting my life, and spend less time muddling through the slop of social media in general? What are the healthy habits that really sustain me and help me feel like my best self, and which ones are causing me more harm than good? How do I really want to spend my energy, and who do I want to spend it with? What activities fill my cup, and which ones drain me? What can I say "no" to in order to find my space in my life for stillness, spontaneity, and even boredom (which is, after all, the birthplace of creativity)?

Ultimately, the concept of minusing is about getting in touch with yourself, and noticing what's actually improving your life, and where you can subtract those things that aren't (be it people, commitments, habits, obsessions, or otherwise). In weeding the garden of your life, you create fertile soil for beauty to blossom. Maybe cutting back on your over-the-top gym schedule gives you space to try out another hobby you've neglected. Or perhaps paring back your 15-step nightly skincare routine gives you time to read a bit of that book on your TBR pile before bed.

For me, I've been trying to cut back on my screen time to open up space for offline creative expression (creative writing, sewing, playing an instrument, etc.). And while I used to compulsively feel the need to fill every minute of my weekly schedule, I'm trying to leave more room open on the weekends for rest (previously, I wouldn't take any downtime until my body was screaming at me to pause, and I'd wind up couch-ridden for a full day). I've even been working on adopting a scroll-free Sunday, where I allow myself to pour through a novel, go for a leisurely walk, or putter around my home.

A healthy life doesn't exist in the extremes.

Minusing will look different for everyone, but the key is really to offer yourself a bit of grace and kindness. One thing I've learned over the years as someone immersed in the world of media is that the internet thrives on extremism. That's what gets you to click. That's what keeps you scrolling. That's what keeps you locked in.

But just as the world is not so black-and-white, a healthy life doesn't exist in the extremes. To truly thrive, in a way that's sustainable, balance is key. So as toxic messaging continues to pull us in disparate directions, and tries to manipulate us into believing we aren't living the "right" way until we're "maxxing" out x, y, and z, I encourage you to turn down the volume on the nonsense. Instead, listen to your intuition, use your critical thinking, and consider the kind of life you want.

Kristine Thomason is a lifestyle writer and editor based in Southern California. Previously, she was the health and fitness director at mindbodygreen, and the fitness and wellness editor at Women's Health. Kristine's work has also appeared in PS, Travel + Leisure, Men's Health, Health, and Refinery29, among others.

Why Game Nights Are the Ultimate Friendship Hack in Your 30s

Jordan Shalhoub (she/they) — Wed, 06 May 2026 06:00:02 -0700

Once you're an adult, it can be easy to get caught up in what I call the time-capsule trap: you meet up with your freinds every few weeks over drinks, catch up on the latest happenings, then part ways. Sure, it's a nice time, but it's not really anything you'll ever think about again. When you enter the time-capsule trap, your friendships can become stagnant. Rather than creating new memories together, you merely live in parallel, watching formerly strong bonds become a thing of the past.

Adult friendships - especially ones that have withstood the test of time - deserve to live, breathe, and grow. They should be relationships that evolve with you and continue to bring new joy into your life. My high school friends and I live in different cities now, but we like to take annual trips together to places (most) of us haven't been before. With the friends I've made as an adult in my new city, I love going to concerts or doing weekend getaways. But, we're also in our 30s with full, demanding lives (read: we are tired and have limited funds). This is where game night comes in.

Having a great game night in your 30s isn't exactly a tough sell. Everybody gets a comfy seat, it's basically free (aside from any food costs or new games you've bought), and if you start early enough, nothing will stop you from your 15-step skin-care routine and 10 p.m. bedtime. So when I had the chance to throw a grown-up game night in celebration of Uno's recent partnership with VRBO, my friends and I were all in.

"There were alliances, rivalries, underdogs, comebacks, and beatdowns."

We arrived at the house and played a couple games of ping pong and pool while we waited for dinner to arrive. But it wasn't until after dinner that the memories really got made. It had been a while since any of us had played Uno. Luckily, we had an assigned Uno dealer to lead us through the game, playing a couple classic rounds before upping the ante and trying some other variations, like Uno Party and Uno Attack.

We're a fairly competitive group of people (most of us met at the gym), so we were locked in. There were alliances, rivalries, underdogs, comebacks, and beatdowns - we really went through a lot together, and I already know we'll be reminiscing on our game night for years to come. To get a taste of the game night magic, you can book your own Uno Wild Card stay this summer, with six limited-time UNO x Vrbo homes (including this Hollywood Hills location).

On paper, it's something so simple: a group of people and a deck of cards. But sometimes that's all it takes to create a little magic among adult friends. You don't need expensive concerts or extravagant trips to make new and lasting memories with the people you love; you just need a solid game night that can bring everyone together.

Jordan Shalhoub (she/they) is the supervising producer for Vox Media's lifetyle group and has been creating content and digital media since 2012. They started their career as a documentary editor and continued to report and create around real stories that impact real people - at the heart of their experience is a love of storytelling. She also brings to her work a personal passion for wellness through a fitness trainer certification, mental health advocacy, and championing LGBTQ+ rights (and joy!). Currently, they oversee the short-form video program, from strategy through execution, across editorial and sponsored content.

The Joy of Coachella in Your (Late) 30s

Kelsey Castañon — Fri, 17 Apr 2026 11:45:00 -0700

I woke up the first Saturday of Coachella weekend with aching back pain. The night before, I had danced ad nauseam to everyone from Lykke Li to Sabrina Carpenter, walked eight miles, and inhaled copious amounts of desert dust. After staring at the ceiling for 15 minutes, I peeled myself out of bed and rummaged through my bag for Advil.

That's Coachella in your 30s.

The last time I was here, nearly a decade ago, I was 28 and brimming with collagen and the sprightly energy of someone who can down multiple rounds of Aperol Spritzes without begging for mercy the next morning. I wasn't sure how my perspective would shift coming back all these years later, especially considering there are many moments in my life today where I relate more with Parker Posey in "The White Lotus" when she says, "I just don't think, at this age, I'm meant to live an uncomfortable life," than I do any influencer on social media.

As I quickly found out, festival season is not one of those moments. In fact, I vehemently reject the notion that you "age out" of music festivals and can confidently say Coachella is a better experience when you're older. Here's why.

1. You're old enough to rent a car

Let's start with the basics: getting around. In my 20s, this is something I spent 2% of my brain power thinking about, and as a result remained at the mercy of Uber, shuttles, and group carpools. Any time I wanted to go anywhere in Palm Springs, or leave the festival, or leave the festival and then come back to the festival, I had to rely on other people's timelines. Ultimately, this cost me countless hours of waiting and, yes, money.

This time around, my wife and I rented the electric Rivian R1S SUV, which was big enough to haul our suitcases for the road trip to and from Los Angeles but also pack in up to seven friends if we wanted to. It also meant we could go wherever we wanted: on coffee runs, for a late-night bite, on a scenic drive down Palm Desert. Access to a car turned the trip into more than just the festival, and was the low-key advantage that dramatically improved our entire weekend.

2. You don't care about being "seen"

In your 20s, there can be this pressure to dress to impress, hit every "cool" party, spot all the celebrities, and take the perfect photo in front of the Ferris Wheel. That's all fun and fair, but once you've lived enough festival life, you know that looking cute and being seen won't help you survive Coachella - a comfy pair of shoes will. By your 30s you'll bask in the luxury that is leaving a set early, skipping a line, or sitting down during a headliner without feeling like you're missing some big social milestone.

3. You're less likely to pack your schedule

At this stage in my life, I've learned that energy is a commodity; I protect mine with fervor. That's why my wife and I took our sweet time in the mornings and afternoons before making our way to the festival. We were staying about 15 minutes away at private airstream campsite powered by AutoCamp and Rivian, where there were cold plunges, communal fire pits, and a secret headliner experience each day. We imbibed in countless coffees from the Anomaly pop-up, did morning yoga and meditation, ate our meals at leisure, and otherwise moved at a glacial pace, as if there was no agenda on our minds.

That was one of my favorite parts of the entire weekend. Instead of rushing to get ready and map out our day - as if we were checking off a list - we got to sit back and enjoy being in the desert. The result is that I was actually less tired at the end of each day, if you can believe. (I wasn't the only person to enjoy a little R&R, our senior style director turned her Coachella trip into a full-blown "glowcation," which, goals.)

I applied this same mentality to the festival, enjoying the moment instead of rushing to get somewhere. To me, the beauty of something like Coachella is the spontaneity of it all - you never know what you'll find when you give yourself the space to wander into a tent, stumble across a new artist you've never heard of, or just vibe without a plan. (For me, that meant getting a private concert from Tinashe, where she DJ'd to 20 people at Camp Rivian before actually hitting the festival stage.)

4. You appreciate more than just the music

Coachella is about music, of course, but it's also an art festival. In my 20s I might have considered the art installations nothing but a backdrop for photos, a few fleeting objects to lay my eyes on while sprinting between stages. This go-around, I was able to slow down and actually enjoy them. It didn't hurt that, per LA Times, the hippos were back at "Network Operations" this year as chaotic media tycoons, giving my wife and I ample time to discuss its deeper meaning. I guess being in your 30s means finding joy in those reflective spaces, while, yes, giving your feet a break between sets.

Even with the artists on stage, I found myself marveling at more than the performance, but also the sound design and visuals. There's just something to being less tunnel-visioned on the lineup and more receptive to everything else the festival offers.

5. You prioritize little luxuries

In your late 30s, comfort upgrades are king. Whether that's better accommodations, better tickets, better transport, better food, or a combination of all the above - giving yourself permission to be comfortable makes the weekend all the more worth it. For me, that meant splurging on Le Burger's caviar and chicken nuggets and skipping a very big headliner to stand in a shorter line for tacos at Birreria Michi.

When you're old enough to know food is just as much a spiritual experience as snagging a spot to see Justin Bieber, you prioritize those experiences. If you want a free dopamine rush, you can always check your steps at the end of each day. Then get the Advil ready for tomorrow.

Kelsey Castañon (she/her) is an ASME Award-nominated writer and editor with enough years of experience to warrant a retinol prescription. She is currently the editor-in-chief at PS, where she manages content across platforms while simultaneously stockpiling (and reporting on) everything from skin care to wine.

The Best Amazon Spring Home Finds For a Fresh, Clutter-Free Space

Haley Lyndes — Fri, 10 Apr 2026 06:00:03 -0700

Spring always hits me with the same realization: suddenly, everything in my life feels a little dusty. Not in a dramatic, throw-everything-away way - more like I open a window, feel a hint of warm air, and immediately want to become the kind of person who has fresh juice in the fridge, crisp sheets on the bed, and a home that doesn't stress me out the second I walk into it.

But here's the thing: come spring, I'm not doing a full life overhaul. I'm not Marie Kondo–ing my entire apartment or waking up at 6 a.m. to reinvent myself (that was January). What I will do is make a few very strategic swaps that make me feel like I have my life together, even if it's just a really convincing illusion.

That's where these Amazon finds come in. They're equal parts practical and slightly indulgent in that "this just makes my day better" kind of way. Because if spring is about anything, it's pretending you're a new person . . . and then slowly becoming her.

The Best Spring Reset Items

Colorful gloves that make cleaning feel slightly less painful: COOLJOB 3 Pairs Colorful Household Gloves at $11, originally $14
A space-saving broom set that keeps things looking tidy: XXFLOWER Broom and Dustpan Set at $15, originally $20
Under-bed storage that hides away off-season clutter: Budding Joy 90L Under Bed Storage Containers at $19, originally $26
A spring-ready berry bowl that rinses and serves in one step: Creative Co-Op Stoneware Berry Bowl with Handles at $24
A natural fiber mat that instantly upgrades your entryway: KanKun Coco Coir Door Mat at $25
A shell tray that adds subtle shine to any surface: Chi An Home 12.6 Inch Round Capiz Shell Decorative Tray at $30
A coastal-inspired pillow that refreshes your outdoor setup: Hofdeco Premium Coastal Hampton Patio Throw Pillow at $35
Playful glasses that make even water feel like a treat: SiliFine 4 Pack Fruit Icon Juice Glasses Set at $44, originally $53
An essential for surviving allergy season: BLUEAIR Air Purifier at $98, originally $140
A collapsible drying rack that keeps your counters clutter-free: Dorai Home Collapsible Dish Drying Rack at $108, originally $128
A cold press juicer for your "I drink fresh juice now" era: YOYODS Cold Press Juicer at $110, originally $190
Lightweight linen sheets for warmer, in-between nights: Simple and Opulence 100% Linen Sheet Set at $115, originally $144
A cordless vacuum that makes staying on top of messes feel easy: Dyson V11 Origin Cordless Vacuum at $470, originally $630

Meet the Feel-Good List, a Safe Space to Celebrate Micro-Moments of Joy

Kelsey Castañon — Wed, 04 Mar 2026 06:05:02 -0800

A few weeks ago, my wife and I were curled up on the couch watching "Traitors," pretend-screaming at the TV every time a Faithful guessed the wrong person (so, repeatedly), and scrolling Instagram during commercial breaks. When we landed on a clip of figure skater Alysa Liu's Olympics performance doing the latter, we stopped to watch. We must have replayed that video four, five times, the word "happy" triple axel-ing through the pixelated screen.

Looking back now, I wish I could bottle the feeling of that moment, just stick it in an airtight jar and seal in all the goodness. It was comfort in where I was, the connection of who I was with, a glimmer of joy in what I was watching. That's the good stuff. Allowing yourself to feel it is also an important, but often unrealized, practice.

At Popsugar, we've been talking a lot about what it means to "feel good" in 2026, when the news cycle is bleak no matter which way you look. Here's where we landed: it's in those micro-moments of joy. It's whenever you find yourself escaping, connecting, or laughing - not to ignore what's happening around us, but to celebrate the humanity and happiness that exists right alongside it.

Which brings us to today: I am elated to unveil our inaugural Feel-Good List, a curated snapshot of the people, trends, and moments delivering a hit of dopamine this year when the world needs it most. We binge-watched every heartwarming TV show, scoured the internet for pockets of positivity, and went down memory lane as the stars we grew up with made a triumphant return.

Yes, you'll find nostalgia threaded throughout this list, because we learned that so many of us are collectively finding refuge in revisiting the past. You'll see that in every story before you, from the profiles of our cover stars Lana Condor, Taryn Delanie Smith, and Adrienne Bailon-Houghton to the fashion staple that's a literal comfort blanket for your feet to a playlist that makes you want to get up and dance, and so much more. I hope each one resonates with you as much as it did with us.

These are all small things, of course, as is snuggling up on a couch. But remember: a handful of small things has a big impact. Every bit is worth celebrating.

To the little moments,
Kelsey

Rob Rausch Knows You Want the "Traitors" Tea

Chandler Plante — Mon, 02 Feb 2026 08:15:02 -0800

Hang on to your overalls: It's safe to say the turret has never seen a traitor quite like Rob Rausch. "Basically, I'm a toxic gaslighter, but I'm hot enough that it doesn't matter," the reality star previously told Alex Cooper in a July 2024 interview following his appearance on "Love Island." But based on what we've seen so far, season four of "The Traitors" plays to these strengths. By all accounts, Rausch is operating as a villain, doing his best to deceive and "murder" the faithfuls in the castle. The only problem? We can't help but root for him.

With each episode we see Rausch forming (seemingly) genuine bonds, sharing smart strategy, and commiserating over tough banishments. We have a lot of questions, and luckily, Rausch is here to deliver. As the face of Sonic's Break Up with Your Burger campaign - which encourages people to "break up" with their current burger for the new All-American Smasher Meal - we sat down with Rausch and chatted everything from breakfast salmon to fast food habits.

The good news is, when it comes to food, Rausch believes more is more. Yes, you can share his fries, and honestly? He's coming for yours too. "I'm definitely a big sharer," he tells Popsugar. "It's good to get a bunch of stuff and I can have a little bit of that, you can have a little bit of this - spread the wealth."

We naturally had questions about that famous "Traitors" breakfast salmon (which true fans know is turning out to be the real star of the show). As cast members trickle into the room, they seem more concerned about securing any remaining salmon than the previous night's murder. So why the sudden salmon fixation? "[It was] the best food item; it was also the only limited food item. So if you got there first, it was probably gone by the second or third round of people coming in," Rausch explains. "It almost became a status thing like, 'Oh, I had salmon today, I'm better than you. You literally can't banish me today because I had salmon.'"

"Of course I want to wear my overalls, but I didn't bring them."

Despite this collective salmon obsession, Rausch did manage to turn a few heads after walking into the breakfast room in his viral overalls - sans shirt, of course. We were curious to know exactly how many overalls he packed for Scotland, but as it turns out, getting his hands on the first pair was a bit of a journey. "I honestly didn't bring any . . . I didn't think [they[ would be within dress code," Rausch admits. "But they were like, 'Do you want to wear your overalls?' and I was like, 'Of course I want to wear my overalls, but I didn't bring them. I didn't think you'd let me wear them.' So they got me some."

On a more serious note, playing a game with stakes as high as $250,000 isn't for the faint of heart. Thankfully, Rausch has some experience making tricky decisions on camera. "Something that surprisingly helped me a lot was my time on 'Love Island,'" he says. "When I was on 'Love Island,' it was an extremely emotional experience . . . you just feel so strongly for the people you're with, because you're with them all the time, and you form these bonds where you feel like, 'I can't be separated from this person.'"

Ultimately, Rausch is here to play (and win) the game. That means keeping feelings out of it . . . for the most part. "Coming out of 'Love Island,' you kind of snap out of it, and you're like, that was not real life. That was a weird little fish bowl I was put in," he says. "Having that knowledge going into 'Traitors,' I was constantly telling myself, remove yourself from here, this is a game. You came here to play a game, you came here to compete . . . try not to let feelings get in the way, although it's pretty hard."

We saw a bit of this struggle with Rausch and "Traitors" castmate Ron Funches. The two bonded over being more introverted, forming what felt like a true friendship, and making it so that Rausch voted to banish his fellow traitor, Lisa Rinna, in an effort to save Funches. In a confessional, Rausch explained that, as the odd one out growing up, he understood that sometimes the loneliest place for an introvert was a crowded room (or in this case, a crowded castle).

"I definitely still feel that way, especially meeting new people - and being in this industry, that happens a lot. I'm in a room full of extroverts that are all talking, and sometimes it just shuts you down, and it's a lonely place," Rausch says. "I think anyone that's introverted can definitely relate to that. But it's worth trying to fight because you never know when you might make a new friend."

Chandler Plante (she/her) is a social producer and staff writer for the Health & Fitness team at Popsugar. She has over five years of industry experience, previously working as an editorial assistant for People magazine, a social media manager for Millie magazine, and a contributor for Bustle Digital Group. She has a degree in magazine journalism from Syracuse University and is based in Los Angeles.

Dear Bartenders: Please Stop Announcing That My Drink Has No Alcohol

Haley Lyndes — Thu, 15 Jan 2026 13:16:12 -0800

I'd like to preface this by saying: I'm not a fussy restaurant customer.

I barely - and I mean practically never - complain. But nothing kills my vibe more than going out to a bar or restaurant with my friends, ordering a mocktail or N/A drink, and having bartenders question me.

"You know that doesn't have alcohol, right?"

"Oh, you mean the MOCKtail?"

Yes, I mean the mocktail. Do we really have to draw attention to it? Meanwhile, my friends give me that awkward smile like, "Oh, you're not drinking with us."

The truth is, I want to drink. I want to have one or two without spiraling into hangxiety or sending dumb texts I'll regret. But after having started drinking at 15 years old, I think I need a reset. One drink leads to two, two leads to three, and three leads to, "Why am I out until 3 a.m.?" I've built a toxic relationship with alcohol for myself. And I know it.

That's just my story. But imagine someone who's pregnant and wants to hide it, someone who's on antibiotics and can't drink (but doesn't want to explain), or someone who is an alcoholic trying to better themselves. One bartender questioning their drink can be enough to derail them.

I don't want to be questioned or looked at weirdly for being sober. I'm already dealing with that on my own.

And bartenders, the worst possible case in this scenario is that you give someone a mocktail when they actually wanted a cocktail. No big deal. There are ways to make sure someone gets the drink they ordered without pointing out that it's non-alcoholic, and I'd love it if we could get there.

Haley Lyndes is a shopping writer and editor with more than seven years of experience in the publishing space. Specializing in home and lifestyle, she covers everything from furniture and mattresses to beauty products and fitness gear. Her writing has appeared in BuzzFeed, Travel + Leisure, and Real Simple.

I've Cut Back on Alcohol, but Don't Know If I'm Giving It Up - and That's OK

Sarah Wasilak — Wed, 07 Jan 2026 06:00:03 -0800

I've never been a big new year's resolution person, and I feel like my slow and steady journey in cutting back on alcohol reflects the same sentiment. Resolutions feel awfully daunting to me - while the word itself suggests an intention, in practice, they can feel like a test. How far can you make it without "failing"? That's not the kind of mission I'm interested in signing up for.

I approached my sober-curious journey in the same way. In the last couple of years, I started feeling like it was time to make a change, but I purposefully avoided establishing any defining parameters so that I wouldn't let myself down. Giving up alcohol as a 30-something woman isn't easy, especially when society says this should be the most social time of my life, so I'm being gentle with myself - I'm setting goals, but I'm not attaching them to a timeline or even a certain number of drinks. And while I struggle with anxiety and OCD that consistently tell me I should be more rigid with my rules, my mental health is improving without enforcing restrictions - and that's progress.

Why I'm Cutting Back on Alcohol

I've had a problematic relationship with alcohol for a long time. As a small person with a low tolerance (who also has had an ongoing case of FOMO since I was a little girl), I was always trying to "keep up" with my friends when drinking. Partying wasn't part of my college experience, but I started drinking on weekends after I graduated, and it quickly became apparent that browning or blacking out often went hand in hand. Whenever I consumed alcohol, I'd suddenly not register how drunk I was getting, or that I should say no to another drink. This caused me extreme anxiety and a wretched hangover the next day - and, as many of us know, there's no solution for that. As I grew older, I learned that was just part of drinking culture, only to be remedied with a greasy bagel, an all-day nap, and the shared experience of the "Sunday struggle."

That, plus the fact that drinking led me to make poor decisions (including picking up a nicotine vape from time to time when I was out), did not align with who I am as a person. My mental health and physical health is extremely important to me. As a marathon runner and athlete, my morning workouts are crucial to my emotional well-being. Even if it wasn't obvious to the people around me - many of whom enjoy drinking and don't mind getting a little "sloppy" - alcohol was leading me to be everything but the best version of myself and was directly affecting my relationships.

What It Was Like to Make a Change With Alcohol

When my therapist looked me in the eye and told me, "You have a problematic relationship with alcohol," I said, "I know." Of course I did. I had already talked to my sister about it, which for me meant I was fully ready to make a change - she holds me to whatever standard I set for myself without saying anything at all; I verbalize it, she acknowledges it, and then I do the work. That's just the nature of our relationship, and I imagine anyone who has a sister they are close with can understand that bond and level of accountability.

People who have done work in this area know that this journey is not about proving yourself to others, but much more about self-love.

But doing the work and making a change felt daunting for a 33-year-old woman with friends, coworkers, and family who love to be social. How could I order just one drink? Should I stick to mocktails and not drink at all? Wouldn't that be so boring? But I like the taste of a good cocktail and the feeling of getting tipsy. Why should I stop when everyone around me is ordering several drinks in one night?

Ultimately, it came down to this: I was no longer able to deal with the anxiety and the physical repercussions of drinking too much. All it took was a month or so of cutting back (which, for me, meant having no more than a drink or two in one night if I did decide to go out) for me to feel the difference. It's been about seven months, and I feel lighter, healthier, stronger, mentally recharged, and a lot less anxious.

As someone who had microdosed 6mg of THC to fall asleep for a while, I decided to try microdosing a sativa strain on a night out, which I now enjoy with a nice cold Diet Coke instead. I find this makes me feel just as laughy, if not more so, and I never feel or behave out of control. (Food also tastes better, which is an added perk since my favorite part of a night out is always indulging in a delicious meal with friends.)

What's Next in My Sober-Curious Journey

Part of me wants to give up alcohol completely; then, I could say I'm sober and wear that word like a badge of honor on my chest. I've gotten to a point where I sometimes beat myself up for having just two drinks. But I think that's a touch of my OCD mixed with my competitive nature kicking in. People who have done work in this area know that this journey is not about proving yourself to others, but much more about self-love. Back when I was sober-curious but not making any real change, I used to scoff at Instagram posts that described a dry "lifestyle." I sided with the "YOLO, life's about balance" crew. Now, I'm starting to get it.

I'm not sure what the future holds, but I do know what it does not: drinking too much. And for right now, I'm OK with that.

Editor's Note: If you're interested in watching me talk about my journey, I released a podcast episode on the topic, so feel free to tune in to Dinner for Shoes for more.

Sarah Wasilak (she/her) is the PS Shopping Director. With plenty of experience in the fashion industry and over 11 years as an editor at the brand, she enjoys writing and creating social videos across the lifestyle, health, and fitness categories. She is the host of the "Dinner for Shoes" podcast and has bylines at InStyle, Elle, Refinery29, Who What Wear, Elite Daily, Byrdie, and The Quality Edit.

The "Girly Guys" Are Leaving Performative Masculinity in 2025

Emma Glassman-Hughes — Fri, 19 Dec 2025 10:10:02 -0800

It was the Mary Jane that did it for Estevan Reyes Peña. He loved the silhouette of the black leather Doc Martens shoes, the way they fit his feet, how they had a "kinda dainty" look. He still loves them, several years later, even as his personal style has continued to evolve from skater-punk to the alt-femme but also uncategorizable other thing it is now - enough so that he's actually wearing a pair when we get on the phone.

"This is a shoe that is viewed as very feminine, but it's so sick and hardcore," he tells Popsugar. He remembers the first time he tried on the shoe; it was a "huge click" for him, not just in terms of realizing what kind of wardrobe he wanted to build, but what kind of ethos he wanted to cultivate in all realms of his life.

That shoe was the start of Reyes Peña's gender-affirming fashion journey, which has since migrated to his Instagram, @tevistuff. There, he documents the "feminine-inspired outfits" he wears to his corporate tech job outside Salt Lake City, among other places. Reyes Peña's goatee and boxier frame make him appear pretty masculine, until he gets dressed. Though his following is relatively small, some of his videos - like one demonstrating how he styles a flowy, earth-toned skirt that grazes his mid-calf - have racked up tens of thousands of views and a potentially surprising number of supportive comments. But maybe not so surprising after all?

"There's a huge reclaiming of what it means to be 'girly.'"

Reyes Peña is a small part of a much larger trend, in which traditionally masc-presenting men (especially those who date women and femmes) are embodying a more feminine style - across clothing, yes, but also overall lifestyle and personality. Five years after Harry Styles wore a dress in Vogue, we're entering the next evolution of soft-boi, where descriptors like "effeminate" no longer carry the same radioactive burn for the most crushable celebrity dudes of the day. And while there haven't been nearly as many straight men in skirts and dresses as there were in the early 2020s, celebrity men are still embracing feminization, even if it's subtler. Men like Bad Bunny, Timothée Chalamet, Nic Vansteenberghe, and Pedro Pascal all bring a gentler, more gender-fluid energy to the red carpet, prompting some TikTokers to categorize them as "boys who wish they were hot girls."

Others on TikTok have declared "gay allegations" the greenest flag a straight man can attain (a far cry from the queerbaiting accusations lobbed at celebrities like Harry Styles just a few years ago). "Your boyfriend should have allegations of being gay, that's how you know it's a keeper," creator Evan Lazarus said back in August. "He should have little hobbies that don't make sense, and dress in a way that upsets his parents but brings joy to you."

Reyes Peña knows that video well. "My partner will send those TikToks to me," he laughed. Whether it's his dangly earrings, his set of chunky rings, or his overall warm and inviting demeanor, he says he doesn't usually "give off 'straight.'" (His partner is a woman, though Reyes Peña identifies as pansexual.) Whereas "gay" and "girly" were once considered the worst insults a man could endure, the truth for a lot of men today who have grown up under the influence of feminist and gender-expansive activism is that those are no longer "allegations"; they're affirmations, of something honest about themselves that they once felt they had to bury.

For Reyes Peña, who shares a closet with his partner and regularly borrows somewhere like 85 percent of her clothes, "girly" is not a dirty word. It's a compliment. "There's a huge reclaiming of what it means to be 'girly' and I hope it continues this way," he says.

The Great Softening (trademark pending) has resonated with straight women, whose thirst for softies appears to be deepening. While gender fluidity has always been a turn-on for bisexual and queer women, straight women are also pining after girly guys: Jonathan Bailey was crowned People's first openly gay Sexiest Man Alive this year, while Jacob Elordi - a certified vulnerable king with an impenetrable jawline - is drumming up awards buzz and a buzzing of a different sort altogether. (Vibrators, obviously.) And women of all sexualities have been especially feral for depictions of tender masculinity in film and television, like the sweetly horny hockey players on "Heated Rivalry," which debuted this year to great (critical and clitoral) acclaim.

But this is all happening against a political backdrop that would have you believe the reimagining of masculinity is one of the greatest threats to our nation. The red-blooded "manosphere" is getting louder everyday - one that believes women shouldn't vote, trans and gender-nonconforming folks are subhuman, and that "real" masculinity is measured in cruelty. The irony is that while far-right politicians, YouTubers, podcasters, and streamers anchor their message on the purported value of traditional gender roles, more and more men like Reyes Peña are taking advantage of the freedom carved out for them by the mostly women activists who came before.

Men didn't just wake up one day and decide to start embracing their femininity, Reyes Peña says. "Women, and especially POC women," are the reason men feel more comfortable experimenting with how they present. Their impact on culture at large, not just fashion, is felt every time someone like Reyes Peña gets dressed in the morning. "I hope that's understood," he says.

Where a performative male appropriates femininity and softness for cultural and sexual currency, the girly guy finds a missing part of himself in his embrace of the feminine.

Another creator who vlogs about his feminine-inspired outfits is Vitor Arruda, whose page is full of pep talks for other plus-size men who are curious about fashion but who feel anxiety when getting dressed. He talks about how dressing from "the female gaze" - not trying to attract female attention, but applying a feminine sensibility to the process of getting dressed - has helped him develop a personal style that's more in harmony with his natural figure, more interesting to look at, and more comfortable.

While dressing from the male gaze produces outfits that are "flat," he said in a recent video, dressing from the female gaze means experimenting with different silhouettes, textures, and shapes to create something that feels more personal, more crafted.

The internet might be tempted to write someone like Arruda or Reyes Peña off as a performative male. (And Reyes Peña's trusty tote bag - which he insists he's been using since at least 2018, long before the trend kicked off - isn't helping his case. Just give him a matcha latte and a book he isn't actually reading and he's practically a walking meme.) But where a performative male appropriates femininity and softness for cultural and sexual currency, the girly guy finds a missing part of himself in his embrace of the feminine. Yes, more women than ever are vocal about their desire for girlier, more fluid men. But Reyes Peña isn't dressing this way because it's sexy, or to compete against other men for female attention. He, like other girly guys, is trying to excavate an authentic piece of his identity that was once inaccessible.

"I want to dress how I feel," Reyes Peña says. "And I don't feel very masculine. So I'm dressing for myself."

Emma Glassman-Hughes (she/her) is the associate editor at PS Balance. In her seven years as a reporter, her beats have spanned the lifestyle spectrum; she's covered arts and culture for The Boston Globe, sex and relationships for Cosmopolitan, and food, climate, and farming for Ambrook Research.

Owen Thiele Is a Holiday "Pick-Me," and He's Fine With That

Emma Glassman-Hughes — Wed, 17 Dec 2025 10:05:20 -0800

In Owen Thiele's perfect world, he's throwing a huge holiday bash for both his immediate family and his chosen family - all together. While the thought of mixing social and personal spheres is enough to send some into an anxious peppermint-flavored spiral, the actor and podcast host is all about blurring the lines. Especially during the holidays, when everyone wants a piece of your time and attention. "I love bringing people together, sorry," he tells Popsugar. Sue him.

He knows he's lucky to have strong relationships with both family and friends, and that spending time with them - either in a big group or individually - never feels like a chore.

But for those who are less fortunate - for whom the holidays bring a distinct kind of dread - Thiele has a message, too. In partnership with Baileys Irish Cream and New York City's Funny Face Bakery, he launched a holiday-themed cookie pack called "Swap the Small Talk," designed to deflect those awkward end-of-year questions ("How's the job search going?" "When are we getting grandkids?") with a witty one-liner paired with each cookie. How thoughtful.

Ahead of the holiday rush, we chatted with the "Adults" star and Los Angeles native about staying grounded during this most busy season, forcing his childhood BFF and his new BFF, Emma Chamberlain, to hang out, the worst gift he's ever received, and who will be in his wedding party (no, he's not getting married, stop asking, Grandma).

Photo credit: Oscar Ouk

Popsugar: What's the worst breed of holiday small talk?
Owen Thiele: I hate prescriptive small talk, I hate when a family member tells you what they think you should be doing, especially when they haven't done what they should be doing. I would advise that they drink some Baileys and sit down on the couch and take a load off.

PS: Any tips on how to survive those awkward moments?
OT: I would try to steer the conversation the way I want. I would take charge . . . Or let's just play some games. Let's play charades.

PS: What's the most memorable holiday party you've ever gone to?
OT: Every year, my aunt has this Christmas Eve party and we just sit around the piano and sing, and it's the sweetest, most wholesome night of the year for me. Also, I snuck into Seth MacFarlane's holiday party once. Well, I was technically invited, but he doesn't know me so I consider it sneaking in. It was so much fun. I've never had more fun in my life. It was everyone who I've ever looked up to in a room. It was so intimidating to walk into. I had a little liquid courage and I went and danced the night away.

"My ideal holiday setup has both my family and my chosen family."

PS: What's your take on hosting during the holiday season? Does it excite you, is it a nightmare, or a little mix of both?
OT: Love it. I like steering the boat. If I'm the host, I get to play Sabrina Carpenter's "Fruitcake," I get to have the party favors be Rhode, I get to have the Baileys out, I get to do it my way and no one can say anything.

PS: The holidays are always framed as a time to connect with family, but what about friends and chosen families? What role do those relationships play in your ideal holiday setup?
OT: My ideal holiday setup has both my family and my chosen family. I speak to my best friends every single day, like every two hours. We're constantly talking in a group chat or FaceTiming, and sometimes we'll add my mom into the group chat too. We're all very close. My dream is to have a huge party with my immediate family and my chosen family, both childhood and newer friends. The other day I had dinner with one of my oldest best friends and my newest best friend, Emma Chamberlain. I don't know if they had fun but I had the most fun in my entire life. Somebody I've known forever who I love so deeply, who will be in my wedding party, and then Emma who will also be in my wedding party. That's a dream, getting two parts of my life together. I love bringing people together, sorry.

PS: That doesn't make you anxious, the worlds colliding?
OT: Most people want to keep things separate, which makes sense, your work and your personal life, etc. But for me, because I love everyone so deeply, I think if I love them they should love each other. I'm not afraid to bring them together.

"I'm a big gift-giver, which sounds so much like a pick-me."

PS: Do you have a holiday gifting philosophy?
OT: I'm a big gift-giver, which sounds so much like a pick-me but I do love giving gifts. My favorite thing (that's definitely pick-me) is hearing a friend or family member say how they want something and then you get it for them. You become Santa. It's such a joy. That's my favorite part of the holiday.

PS: What's the best gift you've ever received and also the worst?
OT: My mom and I have matching necklaces, which might seem weird and codependent, and it is. We wear them every single day. That was the best. The worst gift was from my cousin - she knew I liked tuna salad, so she got me tuna cans. I thought it was a bit, but it wasn't. That to me is like coal. Canned fish.

PS: Do you have any advice on tending to your friendships during the super busy holiday season?
OT: Even though I love my family and friends, the holiday season is still tough. It just brings up a lot of things and you're suddenly uncovering parts of yourself while listening to "Santa's Coming to Town" walking through The Grove and crying. I think the first step during the holiday season is taking care of yourself. This holiday season I am going to pamper myself and give myself some extra love. Take it easy. Don't people-please. If anyone's mad at you, check back in January.

Meet Our First Feel-Good Person of the Year, Amaya "Papaya" Espinal

Kelsey Castañon — Mon, 17 Nov 2025 06:10:02 -0800

I've always believed that the people who make us feel the most are the ones who quietly (or not so quietly) change the world. They remind us that impact isn't always about perfection or power; sometimes, it's about mispronouncing a few words on national TV and somehow making millions of people fall a bit more in love with humanity again.

That's Amaya Espinal, affectionately referred to by fans as Amaya Papaya.

If you spent even a single night this past summer with a glass of wine in one hand and your TV remote clicking into "Love Island USA" in the other, you already know who she is. The first half of the internet tuned in for the drama. The second half stayed for her.

We didn't want to pick someone who just dominated headlines. We wanted someone who made society at large feel good again.

You see, Espinal has this magnetic energy that lingers like perfume. On the show, she turned her self-acknowledged speech impediment - and the now-iconic mispronunciations that came with it ("gratatuily," "acopalyse," and who could forget "hyper-bow-lee") - into a lesson in confidence. When she and Bryan Arenales became the first Latino couple to win the show, she didn't just make reality TV history, she also made it feel like the entire Dominican diaspora was celebrating with her. She even introduced the phrase "sensitive gangster" into our cultural vocabulary - a term that, if I'm being honest, we could all use more of in our lives right now.

At Popsugar, we've built our entire brand on the belief that feeling good isn't frivolous - it's a radical act of self care. It's the pulse that drives everything we do, from the stories we tell to the communities we build to the free PS Fit workouts that make us sweat in our living rooms. So when it came time to choose our inaugural Feel-Good Person of the Year, we didn't want to pick someone who just dominated headlines. We wanted someone who made society at large feel good again.

Espinal did exactly that, reminding the world every night but Wednesday for six weeks this summer that being real is still the most powerful thing you can be on the internet. That joy, connection, and authenticity are really what moves culture for the better. This cover story is a celebration of her impact, and the first of many "feel good" moments you can expect from Popsugar. I hope learning more about the person behind the TV personality makes you smile. I hope it makes you think about the people who've brought light to your own year, and maybe even inspires you to shift your mindset when you wake up each morning.

In addition, we're kicking off something of an "Amaya week" at Popsugar. We've asked our team of editors to put what we've learned from Espinal into practice, including sprinkling self-affirmations into our weekly routines, diving into her special approach to friendships, and reflecting on what her Dominican American representation means beyond the show.

Here's to the feel-good effect of Amaya "Papaya" Espinal. Enjoy.

- Kelsey

P.S. It's true, Popsugar's Feel-Good Person of the Year cover story is just the start of our Feel Good franchise, one that honors the people, places, products, and moments that turned pop culture into purpose - and reminded us that feeling good is, actually, a pretty serious business. Watch this space for more.

For Karol G, Success Means Honoring Her Roots and Uplifting Her Community

Johanna Ferreira — Tue, 11 Nov 2025 09:00:02 -0800

Image Source: Photo by Arnold Jerocki/Getty Images

It's been more than two years since Karol G released her history-making album "Mañana Será Bonito," and the Colombian superstar has been on an unstoppable run ever since. The project became the first all-Spanish album by a female artist to hit No. 1 on the Billboard 200, earning her the largest US streaming week ever for a Latin album by a woman - surpassing Shakira. Since then, she's made history as the first Latina to headline a stadium tour and sold out arenas worldwide.

But with success often comes sacrifice. Karol has barely stopped since the release of the album - something fans got a glimpse of in her Netflix documentary, where she opened up about how little time she has for herself. Two years later, that's still the case. And while she continues to struggle to find moments of rest, her goal is to eventually create more balance in her life.

"You are working every day so hard, and sometimes things happen, and the next day you have another thing to do - work, another flight, another something. And there are these little moments where you really do get to stop and it's like, wow," she tells Popsugar. "So lately I've been trying to be more conscious about all the things that have been happening because I'm so busy doing a lot of stuff and things are happening and I'm not even realizing that this is happening to me."

Thankfully, Karol has close family and friends that have been with her on the journey.

"I have the same friends. The most new friends that I have, have been by my side for at least seven years. And most of them for 10 years or 15 years - we are a close group," she says. "If I have two days off, I just bring them to where I am and I try to celebrate with them by spending time. It's my way of celebrating my winnings in life."

Indeed, Karol has had many winnings - she has racked up numerous awards, including several Latin Grammys and a Grammy for Best Música Urbana. This year alone, she dropped her second album, "Tropicoqueta," released her Netflix documentary "Karol G: Tomorrow Is Beautiful," and headlined the 2025 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Yet even with all that on her plate, the artist and entrepreneur still found time to collaborate with tequila producer Casa Dragones and its CEO, Bertha Gonzàlez Nieves - another powerhouse Latina - to create the brand's first cristalino expression, 200 Copas, inspired by her hit song of the same name.

"It was important for me to work with Casa Dragones, because it became my favorite tequila ever. When I tried Casa Dragones, I became a huge fan of the brand and was like, 'Wow, the taste of this is amazing,'" she says. "When I got this idea of doing a tequila, and I found out that Bertha was the CEO of Casa Dragones, it became even more spectacular for me to do this partnership because it represents a lot of who I am and what I stand for. To have the opportunity to create a product like this with Berta, it just keeps the messaging of cumple sueños and Latina empowerment."

Because it was essential to Karol, as a Colombian woman, to honor tequila's true origins, the launch celebration for 200 Copas took place at the Casa Dragones house in the picturesque town of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico - during Día de los Muertos weekend. The location and timing couldn't have been more fitting. It was also the first time Karol - who has always felt a deep connection to Mexico and its culture - experienced Día de los Muertos firsthand. She even brought a photo of her late grandmother to place on the altar and served her new tequila there as an offering to her ancestors.

Image Source: Courtesy of Casa Dragones

The two-day celebration included a panel conversation with Karol and Casa Dragones CEO Bertha González, an intimate dinner featuring a gourmet Mexican meal by Chef Daniela Soto-Innes, and a lively pregame party the next night at Sala de Despecho - where everyone sang their hearts out to Spanish heartbreak classics karaoke-style alongside Karol in a packed bar. The festivities concluded with a full-on dance party back at Casa Dragones. The entire experience reflected not only Karol's attention to detail but also her deep commitment to celebrating culture and honoring Latinidad in all its forms.

Image Source: Courtesy of Casa Dragones

"I think this collaboration came at a very special moment in my career because a lot of things have been happening to me lately. I worked so many years where nothing happened. It was just me working and waiting for an opportunity and waiting for a moment," she says. "And after 2020, I started seeing all the results of all these beautiful things, and I think this collab especially came at the perfect moment. I think I needed this experience. I think I needed the knowledge that I now have to respect what I wanted to do for this special brand that we are creating."

With all the positive things happening in her life, Karol also never misses an opportunity to shout out her Latine community, whether in interviews or in her documentary, where she admits that without the love and support of her Latine fans, she wouldn't be the artist she is today. That gratitude is exactly what inspired her to make "Tropicoqueta," her most unapologetically Latina album yet, with tracks that pay homage to her roots and celebrate the culture that shaped her.

"It's the most Latina album that I've created in my career," she says. "I'm really proud that I'm [performing] all around the world and not just bringing one flag, I'm bringing the flags of all our countries. For me to stand up on stage with the Latina flavor, not trying to be something else. For me, it's the craziest and the most beautiful thing."

This year has been a complicated one for Latines. On one hand, we continue to push forward and prove our resilience. In arts and entertainment, we're thriving - with stars like Bad Bunny and Karol G leading the charge as some of the most prominent global artists, breaking records that even English-language performers haven't reached. Yet, Karol is also profoundly aware of the challenges our communities are facing in the US - from mass deportations and ongoing discrimination to vital programs like SNAP being cut and protections like DACA once again under threat.

"I think right now I'm super happy because this is a great moment for Latinos. But this is also a really bad moment for Latinos right now. So, with the album that I did, I feel very, very proud," she says.

"I just feel like that is part of my mission and as I said, I just feel that it's crazy that I was doing reggaetón and then all these beautiful things started happening, being the most Latina version of myself," she continues. "It came literally because of the people that followed me when I was on tour, and just seeing people bringing their flags to every concert that I was at, I'm like, I want to be this for the rest of my life. I want to be a piece of home for my people and to feel all that love is super special."

Johanna Ferreira is the content director for PS Juntos. With more than 10 years of experience, Johanna focuses on how intersectional identities are a central part of Latine culture. Previously, she spent close to three years as the deputy editor at HipLatina, and she has freelanced for numerous outlets including Refinery29, Oprah magazine, Allure, InStyle, and Well+Good. She has also moderated and spoken on numerous panels on Latine identity.

Ian Lara Believes in Working Hard - but Not Crashing Out

Johanna Ferreira — Fri, 10 Oct 2025 07:00:02 -0700

We live in a world where everyone's chasing their next dopamine hit. With social media and smartphones dominating our daily lives, we've adopted an "I want it now" mindset for everything - from landing the dream job to finding "the perfect partner." So many people believe they're just one viral video away from instant fame and fortune, forgetting that real success has always required hard work, discipline, and time. If there's one artist I can promise you isn't taking shortcuts, though, it's Ian Lara.

Nearly 15 years into his career, the Dominican American standup comedian has built an impressive resume: from his viral Comedy Central set on "Stand-Up Featuring" to his first 30-minute special in 2020 for HBO Latino's "Entre Nos: LA Meets NY," five appearances on "The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon," and his 2022 debut hour-long HBO special "Romantic Comedy" on HBO Max. Now, after two years on the road, Lara returns with his latest special, "Material Boy," which was released on October 10 on Pluto TV and will be available on Prime, Tubi, Roku, and YouTube this November. Directed by Aida Rodriguez, the title is a nod to his unwavering dedication to the craft and his relentless pursuit of perfecting material - a commitment on full display in this special, where every joke lands and the performance is brilliantly polished from start to finish.

"In a society that doesn't want to take time out to build stuff and that prefers things to be handed to them quicker, where stories are being told in one-minute clips, I decided to go with 'Material Boy' because I am a guy who still takes my time. I need time to build and to create material," Lara tells Popsugar. "I value the writing. I value the storytelling aspect of it. I can try to crank out a new special every year. A lot of people do that. But for me, I don't think that's conducive to what I like to do."

Lara is talking about perfecting the balance it takes to turn the world's chaos into laughter - a dance of timing, rhythm, sharp writing, and skillful performance that transforms storytelling into its rawest, most vulnerable form: standup comedy.

If there's one thing Lara has learned from nearly two decades of performing night after night at comedy clubs across New York City, around the country, and even abroad, it's to give himself more grace when it comes to chasing the perfect "work-life balance." He admits he's missed countless birthdays and get-togethers, with most of his 20s and early to mid-30s spent onstage rather than out with friends. Sometimes he doesn't have time to date. And while he makes more of an effort to carve out moments for family - being the family man he is - even that had to sometimes take a backseat while preparing for his new special.

"I think with work-life balance, the definition is different for everyone. What does it mean for me? I just think it means finding that sweet spot between hitting the highest level of productive output without burning and crashing out," he says. "I think that's the balance. You want to be able to do the most work - good work - without losing your mental sanity."

Lara reflects on living in what he calls a "microwave society," an era of instant gratification where people expect success overnight. At the same time, he points out the contradictions we face - especially in America. Capitalism has always preached hustle and grind as the path to achieving your dreams. Yet we've also begun to recognize the need to protect our physical, emotional, and mental health.

Social media, meanwhile, has sold a false narrative: that manifesting alone can land you your goals, a six-pack, flawless skin, and enough money for a private jet in just a year or two. It sounds funny - which is why Lara has plenty of jokes about it in his new special - but the pressure is real. Today, the chase after fame can consume anyone, from aspiring entertainers to your local barista.

"Y'all remember back in the day when if you wanted something, you had to work to get it?" Lara asks in the special. "That's outdated. You no longer have to do that. They created this new thing, it's called manifesting, and the best part about it is you don't actually have to do anything."

"I'm kind of taking the most surreal approach to making fun and mocking it because that's how some of the people I speak to sound to me," he tells me, laughing. "Manifesting and the law of attraction - they've become just buzz phrases that don't really mean anything. The truth of the matter is, if you pursue something with all your passion and give it your all, the universe does contort for you. That's not manifesting, though. It's not happening because you said, 'I'm going to do it.' It's because you are doing it."

Lara believes balance means trusting yourself while putting in the work, making space for self-care, and setting boundaries with your time. But even boundaries, he argues, are something this generation has taken a little too far.

"I saw it with mental health for a while, where mental health exploded, and everyone was like, 'Oh my god, this is so great. We're finally addressing past traumas and dealing with them and growing.' But then people started using mental health as an excuse to not speak to their family because they were 'setting boundaries,'" he says. "They'd be like, 'Every time I go over, they make me wash the dishes and that's against my boundaries, so I can no longer speak to my mom,' which is like wow. I think we've taken it too far."

These days, Lara says balance comes from sticking to routines that keep him focused and organized enough to carve out time for family, friends, and even the occasional getaway - like flying to Puerto Rico with his primo for Bad Bunny's residency on his birthday weekend. His schedule is built around late nights: he's up by 10 a.m. after getting to bed around 3, at the gym by noon, and eating lunch by 1. The rest of his day is packed with writing and reviewing material, calls with his managers, booking travel, auditioning for film roles, recording his weekly podcast, "Adulthood," and squeezing in press interviews. By night, he's back onstage: Monday through Wednesday bouncing between New York clubs like The Stand, Comedy Cellar, Gotham Comedy Club, and New York Comedy Club for 15-minute sets, and Thursday through Sunday on the road performing his full hour.

"I'm trying to be more intentional about finding balance. More intentional about taking time off to live life," he says. "I don't want to waste my youth on things that in the future I might look back and be like, I wish I had done those things but I didn't because I was too busy working. So I say find joy in life with friends and family and be confident that the work is still being done - because you do still need to do the work."

In a world chasing quick wins, where likes, shares, and views often overshadow real craft, Lara reminds us that true success comes from discipline, focus, and the willingness to give something your all. He's mastered what so many folks are still trying to figure out - how to give everything to the dream without losing yourself in the process. Lara is proof that mastering something doesn't have to mean burning out. It means learning when to push and when to rest.

Why Everyone on TikTok Wants to Be a "Cool Aunt"

Emma Glassman-Hughes — Thu, 25 Sep 2025 15:00:02 -0700

Revving a sports car. Hiking a stunning trail. Taking a caviar bump. Surfing a massive wave. These aren't the pursuits most girls are encouraged to chase as they grow up - and for the "cool aunts" of TikTok, that's exactly the point.

Of all the trends that sweep through the app, this one has harnessed the joy of self-determination better than any other. Set to a Kanye song remixed with a track by Nemzzz, a "cool aunt" video (sometimes called "Plan B") typically opens with a list that reads something like: "Plan A: married by 25, homeowner by 27, kids by 30." But when the beat drops, so do a slew of clips of all the amazing things the creator has done with her life instead of hitting those conventional benchmarks. The screen reads, "Plan B: cool aunt." Cue the bucket-list travel and the red carpets and the bungee jumps.

You don't need an actual niece or nephew to qualify as a cool aunt on TikTok - just a camera and a zest for life. (And a well-endowed bank account never hurts.)

One Los Angeles college student joined in on the trend this year, soon after her 21st birthday. Hershy (we've withheld her last name for privacy reasons) tells Popsugar that her mom got married at 21, prompting Hershy to reflect on "what it means to be an adult and be the first woman in my family who has actual choice in regards to children and marriage."

"I feel at this age that my goals are limitless versus when I was younger."

She says her goals for herself have shifted as she's grown up and gained more independence. "When I was younger, there [was] only one path presented to me in life: study hard, marry by 26, have kids, and care for my family," she tells PS over email. "As I got older, I realized that this path never truly served me or the women before me. My dreams for myself are so much bigger and are supported by generations of women before me who fought for me to have the opportunity to live life on my own terms."

@heyimhershy
find out what ends up happening in 5-7 years 🙂‍↔️
♬ original sound - hershy ౨ৎ ஹர்சினி

Kelsey Kawamoto, a 33-year-old Denver-based digital nomad and another cool aunt of TikTok, says she's experienced a similar transformation in her mindset as she's gotten older, having surpassed the ages by which she once thought she "had to hit certain stereotypical 'adult' checklist marks."

"Creating this video made me feel proud of myself for all the 'Plan B' opportunities that were possible in my life because I didn't follow the traditional 'Plan A' schedule," she says. "I feel at this age that my goals are limitless versus when I was younger."

Ten years ago, she says, she saw herself leading a more conventional life, as a married homeowner with kids. But now, the goal that ranks highest for her is to build her own wealth through a job that grants her flexibility in where and how she works. "I want to travel as much as possible and spend my free time doing the things that make me happiest."

That's not to say that marriage and kids are necessarily antithetical to finding your bliss. But fewer straight women are finding suitable partners as the ideology gap widens between genders. And raising children today comes with its own set of unique challenges, like a crumbling reproductive healthcare system and unaffordable childcare; like navigating threats from gun violence, climate change, and AI; and like the still uneven burden of emotional labor that mothers absorb. A through line in so many of the cool aunt videos is the message that the choice to become a wife or a parent should always be just that: a choice.

"Women are so often expected to dim themselves as they grow older . . . but growing older doesn't mean giving up your own sense of self."

And in turn, you can choose to become something else entirely, especially with the money you save from not having to pay for a wedding, pay for a mortgage, or pay for childcare costs.

Kawamoto, for instance, sent her email responses to me from the cruise ship she's living on for the next few weeks, traveling from Alaska to Japan. As a digital nomad, she spends the money she would have otherwise put toward rent on travel costs. "If I did have the common responsibilities that [come] with being a full-time parent I don't believe I would be able to live the spontaneous and free life that I am currently," she says.

@kelseykawamoto
Time to activate… Plan B 🥂 #coolaunt #planb
♬ original sound - DailySav

Kawamoto isn't just an aunt on TikTok, though; she actually has two nephews in real life, too, and she takes her role as a caretaker very seriously: "I will know I have achieved my mission as a 'cool aunt' when my nephews live life authentically and not just by what they think they should do because of societal norms."

TikTok has seen a smattering of "cool uncles," too - guys who post their own versions of the Plan A and Plan B format. But while independence, curiosity, and a sense of adventure are fostered in most boys and men from an early age, women and queer people have had to fight for the space to consider their own freedom before signing over their lives in service of others.

Hershy, who hopes to build a career in dance, music, fashion, or content creation after graduation, feels like she hit her cool aunt milestones when she hosted her first Diwali-Halloween party in her college apartment, and when she flew from LA to New York City alone to attend New York Fashion Week.

"Cool aunt is an energy!" she explains. "Women are so often expected to dim themselves as they grow older and to build their identity around motherhood and marriage, but growing older doesn't mean giving up your own sense of self. Being a 'cool aunt' simply means being a mature girl who lives her best life on her own terms."

I Have FOMO Over Charli XCX's Wedding, and You Can't Tell Me That Isn't Normal

Emma Glassman-Hughes — Mon, 22 Sep 2025 15:35:01 -0700

On the first day of autumn, Benito Skinner reminded his Instagram followers of the true meaning of fall - that is, to "fall in love again and again." Specifically, on a Sicilian beach with all your hot, sweaty friends.

Yes, I'm talking about Charli XCX's wedding celebration, in which the glitterati of the chronically online (see: YouTube sensations like Amelia Dimoldenberg, pop stars like Troye Sivan, and Instagram comedians like Jordan Firstman) gathered on the rocky shores of Sicily to smoke cigarettes and eat giant prawns.

Now, I'm happy for them. Really, I am. But I'm also vibrating with enough FOMO to launch a thousand yachts, or whatever the bratty bunch rode in on to celebrate the union of Charli XCX and George Daniel.

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Even at a time when everyone else seems eager to announce their "ROMO" - the relief of missing out - my FOMO still drives approximately 98 percent of my life decisions. I have so much FOMO that I even have FOMO about not having ROMO. (What, we're all having ROMO now and no one told me?)

No matter what I do, I'll always be a FOMO kind of gal. Having a party? I will be there. Going to dinner? Save me a seat. Telling a secret? My ears are open. I know we're all burnt out and overstimulated thanks to our screen addictions and the ceaseless demands of the capitalist agenda. And believe me, I feel that, too. But I've never understood how so many of my friends and peers can be so comfortable staying home while the rest of the world is sipping champagne and skinny dipping in the Mediterranean.

The way Charli XCX's "Brat" album took over my summer last year makes me feel like I probably should have been on the guest list, too.

In general, celebrity parties (and the Instagram carousels they yield) are major FOMO triggers for me. No matter how much healing I've done in the almost 10 years I've been out of college, something about a mirror selfie at the Met Gala or seeing Caroline Polachek drink an Aperol spritz makes me feel like I'm 19 again and I didn't get the invite. I know these are just parasocial friends and not real friends, but the way Charli XCX's "Brat" album took over my summer last year makes me feel like I probably should have been on the guest list, too.

This is not a sob story for me, though. I've found that listening to my FOMO - or you could call it my curiosity, if you're feeling nice - has led me to say yes to some pretty special experiences of my own, from headbanging with punks in Dublin to cage diving with great whites near Cape Town and watching the sunrise from a rooftop in Mexico City. Though it's sometimes cast in an unflattering light, more often than not, my fear of missing out shape-shifts into my bliss for having participated.

As far as celebrity parties go, however, not all are created equal. I wasn't afflicted with an ounce of jealousy for any guest at the Bezos-Sánchez wedding. (I wouldn't touch that gathering of billionaires with a 4,000-mile-long pole.) But ever since I binged "Overcompensating" in the spring, I do have to admit that anything Skinner touches will have me foaming at the mouth.

Lorde, who was not pictured in any of these nuptial photo dumps, said it best in a comment on one of Charli's posts last week: "My FOMO activating." I guess in the end I'm never really that alone, am I?

Emma Glassman-Hughes (she/her) is the associate editor at Popsugar Balance. In her seven years as a reporter, her beats have spanned the lifestyle spectrum; she's covered arts and culture for The Boston Globe, sex and relationships for Cosmopolitan, and food, climate, and farming for Ambrook Research.