I've always been fascinated by how we describe people to one another. I've caught myself instantly starting off descriptions of others by mentioning someone's height before stating their other distinguishing characteristics, but when it comes to others describing me, my head full of curly, dark hair [1] is the first thing most people think of when they think of me.
Ever since I transitioned [2] from straight, relaxed locks to my naturally curly [3], coily hair, I've been known as "the girl with big hair" in both my personal and social environments. During the first few years of letting my curls loose, I was always self-conscious about how I would be perceived due to my hair, especially when it came to my work in professional settings, but it was only after I started to embrace my hair and let my curls do their thing, whether I was in a corporate meeting or covering events on the red carpet, that I truly began to see how having hair that was different from those around me could be a blessing is disguise.
I've been known as "the girl with big hair" in both my personal and social environments.
Throughout my career as a writer, my curls have become an instantly recognizable signature that has helped me more than it has hindered me. Associates have been able to identify me from across the room by my 'fro alone, and I've been able to tell when someone has greeted me by easily identifying my locks while they search my face trying to remember my name. Because of the work I have chosen to do, I'm constantly in new surroundings with hundreds of different people sometimes on a nightly basis, and my hair has helped serve as an icebreaker when people have wanted to strike up a conversation with me or simply wanted to know more about who I am and what I do.
I have been cast for a commercial off of social media because of my hair even though I have no desire to be in front of the camera, and I've gotten professional opportunities from many that initially complimented my curls before building a working relationship. My hair has fully become a part of my professional identity, so much so that I have been nearly unrecognizable when switching up my curls with a top-knot or braids, only to be told, "I didn't recognize you without your hair."
It's not lost on me that having my hair be an asset to my life and career has been a privilege.
I was initially reluctant to let my hair be such a defining statement for me, especially as many black women and girls serving in the armed services; working in corporate settings; or going to certain schools in the United States, South America, and Africa are still being told to changes their natural hair to adhere to an arbitrary standard that wasn't designed for them. It's not lost on me that having my hair be an asset to my life and career has been a privilege. Most of my insecurities about my curls were in response to me not seeing many women with a similar look, and I'm not alone in having been afraid of embracing my curls for fear of being different. Even as a successful business owner, Diane von Furstenberg was insecure about her own curls [5] until the late '70s, but got over her own fear when she realized that her brown curls, a feature that not many women around her possessed, gave her an advantage.
Who would Anna Wintour be without her blunt bob bangs? The answer is simple: She would still be the same woman whose work has inspired millions if she switched up her hair tomorrow, but her look, much like mine, has become a part of her persona, and having a trademark can be a bonus when building a career.
I recently cut off most of my curls both to try a shorter look that I've always wanted to explore and to see if shorter hair is more manageable for my increasingly hectic life. As I enter the next phase of my career, one that is quickly requiring me to take on new responsibilities, my hair was the first thing I thought of when I envisioned myself as a budding entrepreneur. I instantly knew that, for me, shorter curls was the look I needed. This look is becoming a signature of its own. While I continue to welcome the comments and compliments I get from my hair in my professional world, I know that having a style that is a conversation-starter is nothing if your work and personality don't back it up. Having a great look has helped me get opportunities, but doing the work has helped me keep them.