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Should Facialists Be Honest No Matter What?

Usually, a spa is a place where you can be pampered and feel good about yourself. That's not the case with some aestheticians who dole out straightforward—some would say mean—pronouncements on the state of their clients' skin:

“If you don’t stay out of the sun and use the products I suggest,” Manhattan aesthetician Julie Lindh warned one client, “you will have saggy skin, jowls, and look like someone’s grandmother in a couple of years.”

Ouch. The client in question continues to visit Lindh because of her facial, but I'm not sure that I would. When it comes to working with aestheticians, would you rather get hyper-direct advice like this, or would you rather just be pampered?


Join The Conversation
phree2b phree2b 9 years
As in everything honesty is the Best policy!
yuliegal yuliegal 9 years
There is a big difference between being honest out of real concern for your client and being mean and rude just to make LOTS of money. An esthetician once told me I looked like 30-and it was 5 years ago-I was 19!!! So if she was just being honest I guess I now look like 40 or something? (I WISH I look like this when I'm 40!!)
keiraz keiraz 9 years
as long as they are being tactful in their honesty, yes. And preferably advice when asked.
htiduj htiduj 9 years
i also think that a beautician is a lot different than a doctor. of course you want your doctor to tell you anything and everything about your health and your care, thats his job. but the beautician's job is to give you a non medical pampered treatment. not to lecture you on the state of your skin. thats the dermatologist's job.
htiduj htiduj 9 years
i am more in favor of a dont ask dont tell policy. if i ask you your opinion, please give me an honest answer. if i dont ask, please dont badger me with insulting things that will just ruin my experience. think about it from this point of view..when you go to get a mani/pedi/wax have you ever had the situation or have had a friend who was in the situation where the beautitian tutts their tongue at you or laughs and says something to her friend in a language you dont understand but know its about you? it just ruins everything. thats sortof true for life. unsolicited advice is not always welcome advice. no matter what the subject.
trixiefire trixiefire 9 years
I dont think that statement is really all that rude--there are some people out there who can really pull off bold statements without them necessarily sounding vicious or mean spirited. I, for one, would have no clue the severity of the situation, and would not take it seriously, unless someone put it to me like that. If they're trying to sell product to me, hell, thats there effin' job, and I should know that before even going into the spa in the first place and I've never been one to slam another's hustle, anyway.
Ziona Ziona 9 years
Let's say be honest politely and don't pressure me to buy your products. I use Olay and have had good results.
MamaD MamaD 9 years
If I 'm paying you to pamper me then I don't want to deal with the attitude you unload on me with your holier than thou skin attitudes!!!! That should come out of a dermatologist's mouth not some technician making slightly more than minimum wage.
bugness bugness 9 years
I've gotten only one facial in my life, and I wish I'd opted for a massage/haircut instead, because it was honestly like going to the dentist. She was so mean. Spas are about pampering, in my opinion. If she would have given me advice in a kinder way, it would have been fine. She didn't have to freak out on me.
mbrown81 mbrown81 9 years
Thats one good thing about someone giving out advice or thier opinion. You don't have to take it. Always be courtious and listen but you don't have to do what they say. It is thier job to tell you that stuff though.
creepupmytee creepupmytee 9 years
be honest but not that direct, hello.
Allytta Allytta 9 years
threre's a lot of different situations, some people know they have problems with skin but there's no product to help them or it doesn't work as good as they'd expect. and 90% of those facial-makers just want to sell you the product, that their spa is promoting. doesn't mean it's the best for the certain client. the same with doctors. so i stick with what i know... and if i like something during my spa session i'll definetely buy it, but not just because i was told to.
rgrl rgrl 9 years
Well, it depends how it's said and if it's really true. The above quote sounds like an exaggeration, but she was probably jokingly doing that to get her point across. Anyway I would never go to someone who was mean no matter how good their skills.
diorbaby diorbaby 9 years
I want people to be honest with me , but please, don't hard-sell you $1,000 products on me. ( I went to a spa near my office, and the esthetician that gave me my facial ALSO tried to sell me over 100 products, ranging from skin care to cosmetics, and actually PUT THEM ON MY CREDIT CARD WITHOUT MY PERMISSION and only took them off when I refused to leave the spa with them!)
SparklinSeahorSe SparklinSeahorSe 9 years
i'm an esthetician and i don't think there's anything wrong with us being honest, as long as someone isn't just blatantly mean. i usually tell my clients how bad it is for you to be in the sun, but i say something after that like "but you hardly have any wrinkles for your age... you have beautiful skin, you just have a little bit of sun damage."
veronicaraye veronicaraye 9 years
just shouldn't be pushy with their products.
snowbunny11 snowbunny11 9 years
Ugh, this is my pet peeve!! One time when I went to a salon and spa to get a haircut, I had to listen to the owner (who was randomly shampooing my hair...) tell me what awful skin I had, and how she could "fix that" and what was the point of getting my hair cut if I had "skin like that"? I also had a similar thing happen at the Clinique counter. I went in for a foundation and instead got a lengthy lecture on their skincare line, accompanied by a look of horror. I had pretty bad (at least persistent) acne that has lasted the last four years, though I have finally got it under good control over the last year or two. It's a little frustrating because people assumed that I hadn't been going to a derm. I guess, or that I didn't care. When in reality, when I got these comments aimed at me I was on about two or three prescriptions, it just takes a lot to get persistent acne under control. On the other hand, I want my dermatologist to be as honest with me as possible, I trust him completely, and it's his job to give me what I consider clinical advice. My dermatologist was pretty blunt because he didn't want to waste time with stuff that wouldn't work. I want people at beauty places to make it feel possible that I am beautiful! I have recently had much better luck at stores like MAC where the associates will very compassionately help me find whatever will best cover scarring, or politely suggest a stronger moisturizer, etc.
Vsugar Vsugar 9 years
Absolutely. No one should be cruel, but not being honest would be like a fitness trainer telling you you look great when you have gained 15 pounds from eating deep-fried chocolate covered candy. You are paying her for her professional services, not to boost your ego. That's what your friends and your mom are for.
jmast jmast 9 years
Yes, if it is indeed honesty, but it doesn't have to be cruel.
kcboyer kcboyer 9 years
I'm undecided on this. A facialist, while having had a lot of training to do their job, are also salesman. And like every other salesman, they're probably going to try and get you to upgrade, so to speak, for the bigger sale. But I'd like to think they'd be honest and not sell you something you don't need...who knows? There's probably a bit of both in every person.
JaimeLeah526 JaimeLeah526 9 years
I think facialists should tell the truth but they should deliver it in a more friendly manner. There is no reason why you can't be matter of fact without being an asshole. I do believe that by telling the client in a mean way it sinks in more but for insecure clients it's probably not a great idea.
lintacious lintacious 9 years
i find it funny that this is being referred to as "honesty." the facialist is lying to you, so you can get more treatments done, so she/the spa can make more money!! so i don't think it's rude, it's business. but i wouldn't listen to it one bit.
jennifer76 jennifer76 9 years
I think what she said is fine. Now, if she had said, "You've SPENT too much time in the sun and you HAVE saggy skin, jowls, and look like someone’s grandmother” that would be unnecessarily harsh. Some people need to hear the ugly truth to be motivated to do the right thing.
hebrew-hunny hebrew-hunny 9 years
I wouldn't mind some helpful advice, but I think it could be delivered a lot nicer than that.
badkitty badkitty 9 years
estheticians are not*t i have an estheticians license and here is the deal they tell you that cause they want you to buy the products that they sell and of course they want you to come back every 4-6's called making a living..and I would never be so rude as to threaten someone with "if you dont use will end up like this.." that is unacceptable and pushy..and its bullsh*t.
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